A few months ago, while I was overseas and out of contact for a week or so, my bf started talking to another girl that he met online. She knew that he had a gf and she had a bf at that time too, but he claims that she was very blatant about liking him and flirting with him. After chatting for a week she asked him to hang out at the mall together and he went. They also had a drink together afterwards which he paid for. However, he felt guilty about it and didnt want me to ever find out so he broke off all contact with her soon after. I only found out about this accidentally weeks afterwards when I saw some emails from her in his inbox asking him why he didn't talk to her anymore. However, he tried to lie to me about some things that happened (eg. he lied about having a drink w her; he lied initially about meeting up w her, etc). Is this considered cheating?
2006-11-13 11:30:12 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Lying is cheating. However, that said, it's relatively minor and what you should do is use it to strengthen your relationship. Tell him that you know what happened and you appreciate him breaking off contact with her. Tell him that above all else, you value honesty and he hurt you by lying even though you understand that he did that with your best interests at heart. Be open and calm about it but don't be angry. Never confront a person in anger. Infractions need to be punished, and most of the time, just discussing something openly is enough punishment to the guilty party. The tricky part is that after punishment, you have to reaffirm your affections by being lovey-dovey (aka make up sex). Everybody loves make up sex...
2006-11-13 11:37:35 · answer #1 · answered by positivepua 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not cheating. It is not that much different than if he had had lunch with a female friend. though "However, he felt guilty about it and didn't want me to ever find out so he broke off all contact with her soon after." and the fact that he tried to hide it means he felt he did something wrong or that there is more to the story. Talk to your man be reasonable and non accusatory. You might find he felt wrong about it because he cares about you or felt you would be jealous and didn't want you to feel insecure. never know.
2006-11-13 11:40:30 · answer #2 · answered by masterlunatic 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you are gone for a week or so and your boyfriend starts looking at other women?
Whether or not his actions are considered cheating or not is irrelevant. He started flirting with other women and even went as far as meeting up with one that was interested in him. In addition, he lied to you about it all. Tell me, does someone who loves you do that?
2006-11-13 11:43:42 · answer #3 · answered by M.A.X. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah I consider that cheating, especially if he lied about it, he's feeling guilty about something but if nothing went on then he shouldn't of lied to you about all of it.
2006-11-13 11:41:49 · answer #4 · answered by Cutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sure sounds like he feels guilty about something, wouldn't you say?
2006-11-13 11:35:05 · answer #5 · answered by randyken 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmmm sounds like cheating to me
2006-11-13 11:35:31 · answer #6 · answered by esile619 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋