Help How do I tell my girlfriends shes fat??

Question

Ive been with my girlfriend for two years and I love her very much but I dont know how too put it into words so she wont think im being mean.But,she is 5'5 and.... she use to be 120.... know shes 150 pounds and im not attracted to her right now her face is all puffy and her body is grossing me out,and she wonders why im never in the mood...how do I tell her in a nice way that she better shape up .....or im shipping out??Ladies no rude remarks....

Well she lost her mom recently,I know thats why she has gained weight so quickly,because she always been an active girl and loved to exercise and take good care of her self...and I dont want to leave her I love her

Answer 1

Well if you love her you will love her regardless, because it is what is inside that counts. If she complains about her weight and is self conscious and unhappy, you can offer to go walking with her or join a gym together. You can spend evenings together fixing healthy but yummy snacks. She has to want to lose weight and then you can support her. There is no way to tell her that she is fat, and 150 for a 5'5 girl isn't all that huge.

Answer 2

How I would want to hear it would be in a concerned way. Like "honey, I love you to pieces, but you've put on some weight and I have too (even if you haven't) and I dont think that you are happy with yourself. Why don't we start going to the gym together." Plan a trip so she is motivated to work towards something. But what it comes down to, if you really love her and she is the one, you'll do whatever to help her and if you're ready to leave over her gaining weight and not helping her or giving her a chance to fix it, then she's not the one and you should let her go and find someone who will love her for who she is. Im not being rude LOL!! Good Luck! You deserve to be happy just as much!

Answer 3

Don't! Women can be very sensitive creations! (seriously, a guy ought to know that) If you want to break up with her just say that you think that your not ready for that kind of relationship. If you want to keep the relationship, go to the gym and ask her if she would like to come with you. NEVER insult her about her weight. Don't force her to come either. That way she will feel that you really care about her and will want to come even more. The benefit of doing this is, when she looses all the weight, and if she's a really sweet lady, you'll have the perfect woman in your life to be with forever.

Answer 4

There is no easy way to do that and I don't know that I would. I'm sure she is perfectly aware of her weight and how she looks. You have to find out WHY she has gained weight. She might have some issues with self-esteem you do not know about. Focus on what might be bothering her. Compliment her every chance you get. If she's wearing a nice dress, a sexy perfume, say so. She will lose weight on her own without you mentioning it!

Answer 5

No i think that sounds fair enough! instead of telling her shes fat buy the both of u a gym membership, it works two ways u can spend time with each other and u can both get fit! if u tell her shes fat she will be hurt, try suggesting low fat meals and walking at night, buy a dog and walk it together. i hope this helps. as a 23 year old single mum i know what its like to be told im fat (even though id just had the buggers daughter!) it really hurts.

Answer 6

Do you know how she gained so much weight? You could try to suggest eating better diet or being more active TOGETHER. You don't have to tell her that you think she is fat. You can tell her your want to be healthy TOGETHER. You can't just tell her the problem and hope she solves it on her own. You two are a couple now. You have to tackle the problem like this together. Rather than thinking how to tell her the problem, start thinking how you can solve this problem.

Answer 7

ooo..this is tricky she might think u only want her for her body!
she will drag this each time u guys a fight and might eventually lose faith in the whole r/ship.

go for a workout togehter daily. say that you want the BOTH of u to live healthier and suggest spending more time doing fun, physical activities like daily power together or cycling etc and watch what u eat together too. dont make it seems as if she have a problem but that ur simply trying to improve both lives.

Answer 8

Don't be hateful about it ... start out by suggesting you do healthy things together. Start bike riding or hiking ... something that is part of a healthy lifestyle. If she doesn't want to follow your lead, then I suggest you part ways. If you aren't attracted to her at 150, you won't be attracted to her if she gets any larger ... and there's no sense in leading her on.

Update: I'm sorry. You obviously love her and want to stay with her. I'd stick with suggesting healthy activities ... if she used to like being active, she'll take to it like a charm. I agree with the poster that suggested the gym. See if she'd like to go with you three days a week ... get her back on track. Good luck ... I hope it all goes well.

Answer 9

I understand, you are concerned about her.

If you are really close to her, sit her down and tell her you are concerned about her health.

If you are not comfortable with that, the next time you two go out, do something more "healthy" like go play tennis at the park, go to a fair where you can walk around..things like that. When you go out to eat, go to healther places - not Mcdonalds.

But I think the best way to help her is to talk to her. Let her know that you are worried about her health and you want her to be the best she can be. She may not be aware that her appearance has changes and may want your help. Be supportive on whatever she wants to do.

Answer 10

Tell her she's fat? She has a mirror she already knows that. She just probably thinks you love her for her. You need to tell her that you are a superficial person who values appearance over substance and being the kind of person you are she needs to lose weight or there is no way you can be with her.