My boyfriend and I became official about 2 weekends ago. The day after I caught him in a lie about his EX...He said he lied cause it wasnt even a big deal to him...i dont trust him cause I think he is lying about where he is spending his time...it is ruining our relationship, and I must say... besides this lie...he is AMAZING...thoughtful, sweet, romantic etc...help!!!!!!
2006-11-13 10:24:59 · 20 answers · asked by yayapoo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, relationships are based off of trust. In order for it to be healthy and grow properly, you have to trust him. usually when a guy lies or just doesn't say something about an ex relationship, it's not because they have something to hide, it's because they have something they would rather not talk about cause it's in the past and this is the present. They difference between guys and girls is guys base their friendships off of actions(sports, video games, egos, etc.) and women base their friendships off of emotional bonding. If he has treated you well except for this one thing, then you should seriously forgive him and realize that nobody is perfect. you might miss out on something very special.
2006-11-13 10:39:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy, violence, lies, anger, dishonesty - all these are enemies of Love which leads to insecurity and ends up in a break up. Trust is the most important factor in love. If you do not trust each other a relation can never last for long. Trust is not a thing to learn, one has to earn it. If one has lost trust in you then its impossible to gain it back (as at some point they might think u r lying). Take your partner to some place where both of you can talk and no one to disturb. See if both of you can work it out and then give your relationship a new beginning and don' t mess it up this time if you get a chance. Earn each others trust, control your anger. and just LOVE each other. This is possible if both of you are willing to stay in this relationship. So give it a shot. All the best.
2016-03-28 04:43:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy, he's got you wrapped around his fingers doesn't he? WOW! So you're willing to swallow he's a liar, cause he is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO amazing (what a big fat lie he told and you are willing to eat?), thoughtful (thinking of more lies he can tell you?), sweet (sweet nothings he was telling missy X?), and romantic (while he's figuring out what he has to do or say to get you outta your panties?). WOW! You sure got him fooled huh? BESIDES with all that going for him, I bet the next girlfriend he has will make him one slick willy? Oh waitno, that's Mrs. Clintons name for Bill isn't it? Hmmmmm.....I see....well I for one, will wait with baited breath for when you come back here strapped with his 3 kids crying he left your dum fanny with your best friend and you didn't see this coming. Come on Darling, wake up and dump him now while you only have 2 weekends into this dog. Why wait until 10 years and your looks are gone? Sheesh!
2006-11-13 11:31:02 · answer #3 · answered by Tippy's Mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So what don't you understand about something that is a big deal to you but not to him? You want truth and he doesn't want to give it to you. You're right, he's amazing--amazingly unworthy. Go very slowly with this deal because it's not a good sign at all when he lies about where he spends his time. Why is that? Because if he lies about that, he'll lie about other things--such as his sweetness, his romance etc. Are you getting a picture here?
2006-11-13 10:31:24 · answer #4 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wait a minute! are you saying your relationship is a mere 2-3 weeks old? Not much of a relationship to repair, is there?
dump him. He is a liar. Dump him now while your investment in time and energy is small. Look at it this way. A guy is on his very best behavior early in the relationship. He's only going to get worse. If you don't trust him, you have nothing. He's banging his ex... guaranteed.
2006-11-13 10:30:24 · answer #5 · answered by Jack C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really don't think that there is anything that he can do to make you trust him at this point. You are going to have to learn to trust him. I'm in the same situation. I don't believe much of what my man tells me but because I love him and want to be with him, I try to give him the benefit of the doubt most of the time. I realize that me never believing him can ruin our relationship so I either have to (somehow) trust what he says or give up our relationship. I have explained to him how his lie has affected me and sometimes I make him sort of prove that he is telling the truth, but all in all I (and you) have to try to put the lie behind me (you) and try to move forward one day at a time.
2006-11-13 10:32:24 · answer #6 · answered by shellese2 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I went through the same thing with my "amazing, thoughtful, sweet romantic" bf also.
if he was all of those things you would not have any doubt about his integrity.
a man should at least be as good as his word.
you guys have only been going out for 2 weeks and there is already problems? walk away before things get worse.
2006-11-13 10:30:51 · answer #7 · answered by Atllas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK...take a step back and read your question again. In one breath you are talking about a lie and how you don't trust him. In the next, you are talking about how "AMAZING" he is. Relationships are built on trust and respect. How can you respect someone you don't trust. This one is doomed from the start. Cut your losses and chalk this one up to experience. Move on.
2006-11-13 10:29:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sadly, I have to say... either accept the fact he lies, and use him for whatever you can OR dump him.
That excuse means he is uncomfortable telling the truth and doesn't respect you enough to be honest.
Regardless of how wonderful a person is, if they are not truthful with you (and you with him) then the relationship will be .... well.... a Lie.
2006-11-13 10:29:43 · answer #9 · answered by kiltboi 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if you only became official 2 weekends ago then he cant be THAT special to you i say if he is lieng leave him....lieing is the worst thing u can find in a man because it always leads to cheating
2006-11-13 10:30:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋