I just don’t know how to go about it, I am 19 years old, I live in my own apartment and have a 2 year old daughter. My boyfriend just recently turned 41. Now he is younger then my parents (they are in there late 50's early 60's), but he is still more then twice my age! We have been seeing each other for a while and have had very many serious talks about our future and what we would want from it. It’s obvious that the relationship at this point and time is in for the long haul (he would like to get married one day and has voiced this to me on more then on occasion). I feel fully confidante of our relationship, my only concern is brining this obviously older man, that’s grey and going a bit bald, to see my parents... and advice?
2006-11-13 07:13:50 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I too have a preference for older men and have been there. First off don't be offended when your family starts in with the what does he want someone so young for. Most occasions when an older man is interested in someone so young it is because there is something wrong with him. That being said there are some relationships that do work out becuase both are really in love and only time will tell this. I suggest that you tell your parents that you know that there is high percentage of varying age difference relationship problems and the two of you love each other and discuss the topic often and want to do your best to work through that and feel it is worth it. More than likely you will get oposition concerning this but don't get angry. There is reasons for their concern and respect that. There does have to be a point though after your family has met him and he has proven time again that he does love you that you need to take a stand and say that's enough he has proven that he loves me regardless of my age and his only negative aspects are normal and I can live with them so I suggest everybody else to just accept my relationship and get over their expectations of me finding someone your own age because it's not going to happen.
On the other hand if their fears eventually get confirmed then don't be so hard on yourself. We never see it for ourselves until it is too late and going through what ever you may go through could have ended up being a wonderful relationship but you wouldn't have known unless you tried.
2006-11-13 07:26:59 · answer #1 · answered by Janet J 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
i would talk to them about it first. it would probably make things worse if you just showed up with an older guy when they were expecting someone more your own age. they may not like it, and i could understand why. while age IS only a number one does have to sit back and wonder why a 41 year old man would be in a relationship with a teenager. i know you have a child and i'm not saying you are immature that has nothing to do with it, but the fact is that you are still a teenager. what is his past relationship history? has he previously dated women much much younger than you? i was once in your shoes, dating a man almost twice my age and now that i look back... i wonder if he was just trying to make himself feel younger or maybe there were other issues? i don't know. just know that your parents will probably be concerned but do tell them before you go over there so they will be prepared.
2006-11-13 07:20:34 · answer #2 · answered by somebody's a mom!! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, my sister in law who is 18 married this 44 year old guy.. Not that its anything wrong with it, its just a difference of experience... I myself dated a 35 year old once, me being 21, and she was a great person.. If you explain your relationship in terms of learning, wisdom, and compassion and love, rather than age and sexual terms, you'll do ok... but also realize, that he will be much older than you, meaning he will probably die sooner, this happens.. I'd recommend analyzing what is best for him, and your parents... this is more important than just yourself, so focus on what will make them more content.. cheers
2006-11-13 07:48:12 · answer #3 · answered by Tom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It almost never works you should be out with your friends and raising your daughter 20 years is quite a distance in fact to much and he knows that he is just getting laid by a young chick my advice is to loose the old fart and get on with your life and remember your daughter should be the main focus in your life.
2006-11-13 07:50:08 · answer #4 · answered by L J 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
it's not your parents who are going to married the 41 year old.just tell them I am getting married to they guy really love and care alot for...
2006-11-13 07:17:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them the truth and give them some time yo get used to yhe idea. Talk to them alot about him until they know you are sincere.
2006-11-13 07:18:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well. I would like to congradulate your boyfriend for getting with a young chick. He might be a kiddy chaser
2006-11-13 07:16:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are a grown women live your life and if they can't be happy that your happy, then that's there problem.
2006-11-13 07:23:38 · answer #8 · answered by catpink1002 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just sit down with them and tell them all about why you're dating him. they'll hate it at first but give it sometime and they might learn to accept it...
2006-11-13 07:20:19 · answer #9 · answered by melz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make sure he leaves you everything in his will ;0)
have a good life with your sugar daddy
2006-11-13 07:26:48 · answer #10 · answered by pidgeywidgey 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋