Has your child become more aggressive?

Question

My 2 year old son started school in September. He has been in child care his whole littel life, so he is very used to being around children. When he first started he did alright but recently he has become more aggressive, saying shutup and shoving kids. Now I know there is another child in the class who says shutup and a few other not ok things, so i am pretty sure that is one of the reasons. he had tubes placed in his ears when he was 1 1/2 and just recently started to pick up words (not mayn, but enough), so he will begin speech therapy soon.

How have you dealt with an aggressive child? He does not do it at home, but just at school.

Excuse the spelling- i forgot to do spell check.... lol...

His teachers believe it is because he is becoming more frustrated with his lack of ability to communicate his needs. He acts perfectly well at home, even better than my older two, who are 14 and 10!
Working on his speech is the biggest thing for right now.

As far as staying home, that never has been, nor ever will be an option in my home. He is in Early Childhood Education, a pre-preschool of sorts.

Thank you for all of your wonderful comments thus far!

Answer 1

I worked in childcare for many years as a teacher and a director and can tell you that every child goes through this. Even though he's been in child care his whole life, he knows the the difference between getting undivided attention and just supervised. Chances are he's looking for more undivided attention and the smart little guy has discovered the way to get it is by acting out. I If you have him enrolled in a quality childcare center, they should be able to handle this with rediretion and some quiet quality time with one of the teachers without really bothering you. You also need to remember that he's 2 and is being 2. He probably has reached a comfort level at the school and now is testing his independence. Unfortunantly, he's chosen to do it through aggressive and defiant behaviors. As of the shut up saying, that could have been picked up anywhere, even at home or (hopefully this isn't the case) the teachers at the center. Kids are such little sponges that will soak up anything new they see and hear. I'm a SAH mom now and I babysit in home and one of the children I watch painted a picture of "a pain in my a##". Just to give you an example of what they could pick up. Also, check with his sleep patterns, eating habits, any changes to his routines, if he's spending more time at school, the time change could still be effecting him, he may be having ear pain even though he has the tubes, and the lack of communication could also be getting him upset, the list goes on and on. (I also have a minor in early child development so many things are coming to mind)

Answer 2

My son is 3 he on the other hand has never been to a day care. People use to go on and on about how he never hit the terrible twos he has always been well behaved. So much so that we would even laugh and joke around that he is more polite and cleans up around the house more than we do. I just had another baby 8 months ago and something seriously changed. Now he is moody and defiant .. At first I thought it was just jealousy. But he has started to say shut up and his personal favorite lately has been "your getting on my nerves" We were floored! I have no idea where they get this stuff? Maybe from the other kids when I take him to the park? I kinda of think it's just something new and they want to try it. you know the saying "terrible twos" didn't just come from anywhere. They say in childhood is the time kids are most confused from all the changes besides pre teen. I wish you luck! :) I am hoping my self that it is just a phase and while I tell him he shouldn't do it and get on to him I try to let him know I am here for his frustrations...

Answer 3

My son did the same thing at age two. He was in daycare too. The only difference was I had just had our second child. He was never mean to the baby, but he was definately upset with us. He also changed classrooms - which means new teachers. I figured it was the terrible two's combined with the addition of our daughter and new classroom environment. He is not quite three now and he has been fine for several months now.
It sounds to me like it may just be a bad influence at school or perhaps if there was a teacher change, that could be it. Children thrive on routine. If there has been any change in your/his routine that could do it. Just be patient, but remind him of what is acceptable behavior.

Answer 4

He is apparently mimicking behavior he has witnessed in other children or perhaps even on television. Be consistent about letting him know this behavior is unacceptable. My daughter is two. I have been at home with her since her birth. She has been very sheltered. Recently, I started letting her play with a friend's three-year-old son. I have noticed a dramatic change in her behavior. She shouts at me and screams when she doesn't get her way, something she never did before, but something I have witnessed in the other child. We cannot protect our children from everything. But we can be patient parents. Consistency is the key. Say what you mean, mean what you say, and don't give in. He is testing his new freedom right now. When he learns the limits of what is and is not acceptable, he will conform. Good luck.

Answer 5

sadly, toddlers in child care for a full day program tend to become more aggressive. this tends to get worse as they get older and are still in child care. the loudest gets the attention. and soon, the other kids learn that concept. toddlers believe they are the center of the universe, imagine for a moment, you are a toddler. imagine yourself in a day care, you are no longer the center of the universe, your only option may be to lash out. like the other kids, to get attention.

Answer 6

Children who are put in social settings early on in life (before age 3) tend to have social problems. I think maybe you should take him out of school (2 yr. olds should not be in school..that's ridiculous) and get him a babysitter.