he always tells me the reason why he hides it from me is because i will get mad. i hate the fact that he talks to her and im not normally jealous but i dont like them talking because he hides it from me. i constantly want to look at his phone to see if they talked and its not all the time it kind of goes in spurts. what do i do. i told him i looked through his phone and i hate doing it but i want to know because he wont tell me. what do i do
2006-11-13 05:15:48 · 14 answers · asked by Redneck Woman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The more you censor him, the more he will hide.
I don't think he is right to hide this from you, and would guess that he doesn't have great intentions.
I would try to have a sit down and get it worked out.
By the way, I think he should be "allowed" to speak to his ex girlfriend, I just don' think he should be hiding it.
2006-11-13 05:21:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, if you don't trust him, then your gut-feeling is telling you something. Some guys (mine included) remain good friends with their ex. My problem is when my guy and his ex talk about me personally or our relationship, which is a deal-breaker. This is also something I'm working on. Anyway, it's due to your jealousy that he is keeping this a secret from you, but I'm kind of curious that if he is keeping this from you, then what else is being kept a secret from you also? He may NOT have anything going on with the ex except for just a friendship, that really could be it. But, if you are that insecure in your relationship, then it won't last. Trust is key, so is communication. Without either, there is no real relationship between the two of you.
Either talk to him (without flying off the handle) about your feelings and ask him to meet you 1/2 way on this. If he refuses, then leave him. If he says ok, then work on your jealousy issues and allow him to be able to talk to you without getting upset all the time.
2006-11-13 05:21:10 · answer #2 · answered by GirlinNB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To guys, women are like cars…
Guys will get the one that they REALLY want. We admire others as they pass by. We'll even look up different models on the web or magazines. We imagine what it would be like driving others. We even sometimes miss the good times and bad of previous ones. We can even pay money to test drive others (eww). BUT…We will NEVER give up or replace the one that we have and love.
AND...
I've posted this reasoning before...
>Put your hand in a bowl of water, make a TIGHT fist, pull your hand out, now open it.
>Now, put your hand back in the bowl, GENTLY cup your hand, lift slowly
>>>Which one allowed you to hold on to what you wanted?
I'm a victim of this very same parable. So...I know exactly what can happen.
2006-11-13 05:20:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't tell you either if you were going thru my phone. Yeah, I wouldn't like it either, but give him some space. Stop getting mad about it and ask him what did she want. It could just might be that the ex can't let go, or wait, maybe she and he are just friends?????
2006-11-13 05:19:09 · answer #4 · answered by Fuzzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I personally think that it is normal for a female to be a little bit jealous. Talking about an ex- doesn't help your relationship, and he shouldn't be talking to her since he has got you. I think its time you think about you. If you are unhappy, make the decision for you. Put yourself first.
2006-11-13 05:23:20 · answer #5 · answered by Island Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it sucks but maybe you should accept it.....well my fiance still talks to his ex girlfriend....was happening even when we started dating....i decided to be friends with her and guess what she turned out to be the coolest friend ever....when we talk its soo much fun and I can complain to her about my fiance and she knows exactly what i am talking about since they dated before...give it a shot and he will stop hiding it from you...if it doesnt work then tell him how you feel. Also tell him how he would feel if u were talking to your ex!
2006-11-13 05:31:25 · answer #6 · answered by Babe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hon if he knows that it bothers you this much..and he does know. Then if he loves you he would tell her to find someone else to talk to. You cant sit there and tell me you are happy having to check up on him and play cop everyday. Tell him ditch her or I am leaving! and if he wont stop talking to her then; You need to leave him because you both are going to be miserable.
2006-11-13 05:50:10 · answer #7 · answered by ~Jennifer~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
calmly have a conversation with him and ask him why does he talk to her?ask him how much he talks to her and how long do there convo's be,and more importantly what do they talk about.let him know that it bothers you and tell him.if he doesn't see anything wrong with what he is doing and then you Can either trust him,give him and ultimatum,or play games and start talking to one of your ex b/f on the phone.
2006-11-13 05:24:37 · answer #8 · answered by alexander 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have no right going thru his stuff you are just a girlfriend, you are not his mother or wife, you may need to back off or he will dump you for not trusting him and invasion of his privacy
2006-11-13 05:19:21 · answer #9 · answered by seilygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
start talking to your ex and see if he likes it !!!!!! two can play that game. maybe he will understand or care for your feelings when the shoe is on the other foot.
2006-11-13 05:24:55 · answer #10 · answered by smurfette_ftwayne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋