To be so jealous? My boyfriend and I are both very attractive and I consider myself a very confident woman normally, and prior to him, I was never jealous of my past boyfriends talking to other women. This one, I just cant get over my jealousy issues. We have been together for over a year and live together, so I know who he comes home to every night and cheating isnt an issue. My issue is that he is only friends with women, all of whom he has slept with once or twice, and if Im not positive, I can only assume because he seems to have slept with all women he has come in contact with. We moved recently to another city and Im afraid of what I will be like when his female friends decide to come visit. When he talks to them (which isnt often) I find myself making nasty comments about them and I understand that it makes me look bad, and even worse, feel bad once looking back. But what can I do to get over this jealousy issue that I am having? I cant tell him he cant have friends...
2006-11-12 18:16:28 · 13 answers · asked by jenmimo7 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You two need to sit down and address your insecurities to him. I think you are 100% justified to feel the way you do given his past history with these women. With any of these women who he had a relationship with/slept with - you have a right to know about that past relationship. If it was a one night stand, then he doesn't really need to maintain that relationship. But if they were friends for years/dated for a while, then you should be open to the notion that they share common interests are still friends.
Overall, you should talk about all the women he's friends with and he should happily talk about each one. He should care about your concerns and how you feel. You should ask about the general nature of his friendship and what they talk about. Those are all justifiable questions to ask in the beginning. What you should do is put it all on the table and let him know how you feel, give him a chance to talk about his friendships and make you feel secure with his friendships, and then just trust him on it.
I used to have a bunch of girlfriends but now since I'm in a relationship, I have distanced myself somewhat. Talking on the phone/catching up with REAL girl-friends is understandable. But I don't really keep in touch with acquaintances anymore. However, if you have any problem with the women coming over to YOUR house, then you have a right to feel that way no matter what. You should never make him choose but he should also never put you in a situation where you will feel uncomfortable.
Just talk to him and tell him how you feel and give him a chance to tell you his side of the story. If he really loves you then he will put you first no matter what. And if you really love him, you will learn to trust him based on what he tells you.
2006-11-12 18:28:21 · answer #1 · answered by WordToTheWise 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol no you cant do tell him that...lol but is it normal to only have female friends? i think not but maybe a good way for you to deal with this is to get some guy friends and see how he handles that...i dont know jealousy is tough subject and its hard to not be jealous im sure i would have a problem if my lady had all guy friends so i try some guy friends or better yet why dont you both go out with other couples try to get him involved with some male bonding or something like that good luck and try not to be jealous it isnt healthy and makes people you know...crazy lol j/k
2006-11-12 18:25:29 · answer #2 · answered by hardrox4u 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What are they talking about on the phone or when they are around each other? If it is the "flirty" conversation then you have a right to tell him since it obviously makes you uncomfortable. Do you see the two of you getting married? If so, you need to talk to him. As far as the "friends" coming to visit, I would definitely have to say not to let them spend the night, they make hotels for that. You are in a relationship, and this makes you uncomfortable. You need to talk to him, open honesty and talking is the only way to make your relationship stronger. If he goes off and completely loses it over you telling him, then I would have to say that he isn't as secure with the relationship.
2006-11-12 18:23:32 · answer #3 · answered by wifemanagermom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-11-29 02:22:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it would seem very strange that he only associates with the women he slept with. that would or should send up a red flag to you that he may still be seeing them. there is nothing wrong with keeping in touch with friends, but only the ones a person has been intimate with is not the normal routine.
2006-11-12 18:22:43 · answer #5 · answered by hollywood71@verizon.net 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How do you think he'd feel if you had male friends over to visit???
Ones in which you've slept with once or twice....
2006-11-12 18:20:35 · answer #6 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should surround yourself with your friends and and talk with them. your wrong on this issue but not totally at fault, you are human. you trust your bf, but not when his friends are all girl, who would? obviously you care for this guy and you have commitment with him, he should commit to you too. have a talk with him before jumping doing another.
2006-11-12 18:31:31 · answer #7 · answered by Magnuszero 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get some professional counseling.
2006-11-12 18:19:36 · answer #8 · answered by mustanglady 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try a Full frontal lobotomy...
You just sound like a typical woman..
2006-11-12 18:19:59 · answer #9 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
well its not a prob with my gf she knows that most of my frnds are female
she trusts me fully
2006-11-12 18:21:35 · answer #10 · answered by Angad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋