what can I tell my eight y.o son who wants to call his dad who refuses to speak to him b/c of child support issues he has with me? His dad cussed me out, and told me to have a nice life raising my son on my own b/c I put him on child support . My ex has not called for 3 months to talk to his son and he won't return my messages, texts, letters, calls .
2006-11-12 17:57:15 · 9 answers · asked by nene 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
He's obviously an @ss, I would get some psychological help for your son as soon as possible so he doesn't end up with abandonment issues and blaming himself for his biological (only) father not wanting to see him. Good riddance to him, sorry for you and your son.
2006-11-12 18:14:16 · answer #1 · answered by onottopilot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly i think your son has a right to know the truth, see what the father does when you call him with your son on the phone, having said that i wouldnt go through the trouble, why should you have to go through the trouble of trying to get your ex see his son when he doesnt even try to make an effort to see him, i know its for your son because he probably thinks the world of his father and misses him, but as long as he has you as mother and father, and as long as you show him unconditional love honey that is ALL he needs, and i say this with 100% of my whole heart, because i know what it feels like to be in that same situation, my son thinks the world of his father, and he doesn't seem to give a s*** about his son, i wish you and your son luck, but as for the dead beat drop him like a bad habbit, your son doesn't need to be put through that sort of punishment and neither do you, your ex will want something to do with your son when he is older and by then it will be too late your son will tell him "where were you when i needed you? Where were you when i was growing up?" Keep your head up, things will turn out ok in the end you will see!! Good luck to you and your son, hope i helped!!
~CHEERS!!~
2006-11-12 18:31:35 · answer #2 · answered by Romy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him you love him. 8 yr old are emotionally vulernable. your ex has the issue and needs to grow up. that does not help your son. tell your son that you dont understand why his dad wont talk to him or you. just say it hurts, and reassure him that you wont abandon him. keep the focus on your relationship with your son and the things that you do together. you did the right thing by putting the father on child support. its there to support the kid regardless if the child is seen or not by the other parent. it might not hurt to meet with a child counselor to work through this too.
2006-11-12 18:37:45 · answer #3 · answered by Skorpian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's using that as an excuse against you, because he doesnt want to pay child support. That's his problem. Has your son tried to call him?
I'd hate to see your son hurt. That would be the ultimate cruelty if he wouldnt speak to his son, once he actually picked up the phone. Maybe your son could also send a note to his dad.
It's YOU he's mad at. He may weaken for his son.
2006-11-12 18:04:11 · answer #4 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for what your son & you are going through. It happens so much and they tell the kids it's your fault they didn't see them. I would tell your boy it's not his fault in any way,kids are so smart these days. It's not right that the dad behaves this way. It's hard to know what to tell your son. Just let the man come to his senses,if he ever does. I wouldn't want my son to be emotionally abused. So tell your son not to call ,to let his father do so.
2006-11-12 18:55:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your ex is being that much of a pig about lie to your son. Tell him he is in the military or off working in Alaska and does not have a phone, have him write letters to him and you keep them.
Fess up to him when he is older, He might understand that you did not want him to hate his father but tell him when he is older how his father was and you saw no better way to handle things.
2006-11-12 18:47:50 · answer #6 · answered by LadyCatherine 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that his daddy loves him but is upset with mommy..and yes that is no reason to talk to you but hey it will make your son happy right...Don't say anything negative to your son about his dad..He will find out all he wants while he gets older ..and that is so sad...Your ex needs to grow up and not take what he is mad at you about out on his own child...Why should the child suffer for what his daddy considers to be important..The child chould come first..
2006-11-12 18:12:34 · answer #7 · answered by Mrs. M 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not take the previous answer "tell him daddys upset with mommy" because later he might think it was your fault that his dad never came around or anything. I went through this with my son i had to make my sons father visit his son. His father did everything you say-disappering never called anything. I always looked for him for my son-BIGG MISTAKE!!!! Dont do that, my son thinks his daddy hung the moon because i would make excuses for his dad all the time and so my son never saw anything wrong with his dad and they try and turn him against me.
2006-11-12 18:34:50 · answer #8 · answered by Kristi A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
**** that sorry SOB and move on your son does not need him in his life i pray that you move on and maybe you might find some one to love you and your son and be a postive influence on his life because his sorry daddy can pay up.
2006-11-12 18:00:32 · answer #9 · answered by alexis 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋