how can I prevent a mom of 3 young kids with a job in the high $50's from joining the Army?

Question

She is 24, single parent, She is sold on the whole GI bill, as well as the $$$$ to be made once she becomes an officer. She believes she will get a low risk MOS (method of service) and wont be sent to die in some country. I am trying to convince her otherwise.

he is 24, single parent, She is sold on the whole GI bill, as well as the $$$$ to be made once she becomes an officer. She believes she will get a low risk MOS (method of service) and wont be sent to die in some country. I am trying to present a reasonable account of alternatives. Im not opposed to military service, just want options.

just looking for facts. Her main motivation for joining is student loan debt relief. Not trying to live anyone elses life, just wanted alternatives that accomplish her same goal.

Let me emphasize. I am not trying to change her decision, I just want to have the facts on the implication. God bless all the heroes we have. I'm looking for a counter to the Recruiter spiel.

Answer 1

umm what right is it of yours to tell her how to live her life? how would you like someone to tell you not to take a job or not to date a certain woman? you'd be offended.

if you are a true friend, you'd support her choice of what she wants to do in HER LIFE.

live your own life and butt out of hers. least she is doing something for her country.....what are you doing for your country?

Answer 2

If i would be in her situation i would stay where i`m the money is very good that she makes for being 24 ,but the main fact would be the 3 kids.
Does she know how hard it is to be in the military to be a single mom,some do a wonderful job they have a lot of friends and family support,but most can`t handle it $$wise and stress wise.
Tell her that no mos is a sure mos go can be send anywhere at anytime with any mos,sure some are more deployable then others doesn`t mean you never get deployed.
plus she need to think about not only deployment wuz up with the field school training how is she going to handle it being away from her kids how are her kids to handle it,she has to have a family care plan
"she must by regulation"does she have somebody she can put on who takes her kids at any time of school for 3 month 1 month in the field deployment etc?
i tell you that i would not understand how can she make such a ?
so my fact are her kids.
If she would not have a job and sees it as i good idea then i would say if you have the family support go for it.
But with what she making now ,knowing she has a good job.....i wouldn`t do that to my kids.

Answer 3

Bottom line and experience here (no kids - but I will give you an analogy). I make about 65k a year, and serve in reserves. I was deployed, made a fraction of my civilian income. Was working on a Master's at the time - had to drop out because of the alerts and deployment. There is no way you can concentrate on school with things the way they are now (at least not a Master's track). On that note- the G.I. Bill is a bit of a joke - I funded most of my education out of pocket or student loans even WITH the GI Bill.

And you can bet your *** she will be in Iraq - whether she has a low risk MOS (Military Occupational Specialty) or not. You mentioned officer pay - she would need a degree or close to it to EVEN BE commissioned as an officer in the first place.

Without a family care plan (a legal guarantee of who is going to take care of her kids during a deployment) they will not let her enlist anyway.

Sounds like a recruiter doing their business, or someone with selective hearing... Ten years service talking here, and I will be getting out this year for good (if you think the education is a joke - the retirement plan is even a bigger joke).

With that said - tell her there are other options out there other than the GI Bill - lots of grants available for single parents with kids. If she still insists on joining, then back her up and support her on her decision - believe me, she will need it.

Answer 4

It is her right and her right alone to decide whether or not to join the US Army.

You have the right to voice your opinion, but that is all.

If she wishes to join then let her, she obviously has a plan to help her family down the road and will understand once she begins the enlistment process that ALL SERVICE MEMBERS will face the risk of a combat tour or combat situation during their contract of service.

Since the US is currently involved in multiple War Zones the chances she will be deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan is very high. Not to mention, with the tensions with N.Korea and Iran could also land her in a potential future War Zone.

If she does well enough during testing she may be able to get a choice of MOS (Military Occupational Specialty).

If she chooses to go you should be proud that she is willing to put her life on the line so you can have the rights and freedoms you currently take for granted, while other people around the world are persecuted, killed tortured or suppressed for even the smallest of violations of some law or dictatorship rule.

Answer 5

well since no one above me pointed this out i will. TEll her to have fun with that because no service is going to take her , with her being a single mom of 3. The limit is 2 kids of a married couple for any service.If they have more after one parent is in the service then it's ok . I tried to get into the coast guard when i only had 1 kid and they wouldn't take me because i was single. They do not believe in seperating the kids from there only parent for long periods of time or having that parent be sent off and killed, and leaving the kids with no one. So i hate to tell her but it won't happen, unless it's different where you live which i doubt.

Answer 6

I was in the Navy so I am all for military service, but in this case she needs to stay at home a take care of her kids, that is the most important job she will ever have! She will not make 50k even as an officer(at least not for many years). She is better off finding an employer to help pay for the school bills.

Answer 7

Good idea, has she thought about the Navy?
Try to reason with her. She probably will get sent somewhere she doesn't want to go. She should know that. It's not worth it to risk it w/ her kids. Plus, being in the Army/Military is a hassle. I'm a NavyBrat and I gotta tell ya, it sucks moving around and having your parents not around a lot of the time. It's not all that it's cracked up to be.
Tell her it's probably way better just to stick with what she's got.

Answer 8

The GI bill and a bunch of B.S.. Tuition Assistance (TA) is a MUCH better deal. It is her choice to join or not. Although, they may not let her join because she has too many dependents. However, the military has been changing rules so quickly, they may no longer be true.

Answer 9

My husband is in the military.

1. He DOESN'T get debt relief.

2. He DOESN'T get paid more than 50k

3. Chances are shes going to the desert more than once ESPECIALLY if she plans on becoming an officer.

If those are her only reasons for joining the military shes got another think commin! And shes gonna have a SPLENDID time figuring out how to take care of her three kids!!!!!!

Not to mention daycare is usually around $600 a month for ONE kid... maybe they have group discounts but i can garauntee if she moves away from family and friends shes gonna have to pay at LEAST half her paycheck to have them cared for!

Answer 10

Be blunt. Tell her she is selfish and dilusional if she thinks that just because she is a mother they won't send her A S S to Iraq.

How traumatic for her three kids! I could see if she were working in a gas station or as a hotel maid. But she is making decent money and needs to place the priority this time, on being there for her kids. It's not a matter of life or death for her to earn better money.

There is no pay-off like tucking your sleepy, cuddly kids into bed at the end of the night.

She's NUTS if she goes.

**This is from a mother who didn't go and who is glad.

Answer 11

She is a single parent - that automatically disqualifies her from joining (see entrance requirements for services linked below). For married soldiers there is a dependent limit (I believe a previous poster pointed that out).