married? Is this how it really is or am I missing something? I know that my guy friends and so forth were nice about shopping with me. Does marriage make guys a complete *** when looking for clothes, even when you, the female are paying for your own clothes? Is that fair or is it a rule never to go shopping with your husband. I thought marriage would be doing most things together, give and take.
I had a bad experience tonight and was so embarrassed by my fellow at the store that I was ready to smack him. He said the rudest things out loud and even offended some of the clerks, I think. I mean remarks like--well is that something a step mom would wear and so forth. ( I am not a step mom and I have no kids).. He was just making fun of a pair of pajamas out loud while I was a few feet away looking at a necklace. He said that infront of about 6 other people. He said and acted rude in other ways too. What is up with this behaviour? Am I missing something? Give me your input.
2006-11-12 15:02:35 · 6 answers · asked by just julie 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Just wanted to add--I did watch the game with him today. lol
2006-11-12 15:14:14 · update #1
Watching other people shop is downright mindnumbing. Not that I'm excusing your man's behaviour. If he didn't want to be there, he should've been doing something else, or he at least could have had the courtesy to shut up. As for me, I have a man who has to browse through every bloody shop and it's hours before we get out of a shopping centre. (I'm the type who shops if I need/want something, not someone who just goes for a look.) So we do the 'I'll be over there looking at something that interests me' thing. Honestly, if the experience of shopping together is an argument waiting to happen, just don't do it. Mostly I shop on my own so I'm not being whined at, or boring anyone, or having to find them again. It's much more peaceful and I can find better things to do with my boyfriend.
2006-11-12 16:41:08 · answer #1 · answered by The Mad Shillelagh 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I've been married for 30 years - and yes that is the way most men act. This is what I do - I leave his butt at home when I go shopping. That way he's happy and I'm happy. I don't watch the ball game with him.
We do have things that we enjoying together - and that's cool.
Basically - you have to decide how much you want to put up with him making an ****** of himself in public.
2006-11-13 02:17:52 · answer #2 · answered by Karla R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really don't know why you even bother with the ? marks!
Yes, most men can seem shallow. Here is why:
Men are form MARS and women are from VENUS.
Men are all about action, fast moves, exciting newness.
Shopping is very boring to most men. And, that is when the stupidity starts to just bubble up and out of them!
You might have him go over and look at the video games or the car stuff, and tell him to meet you in 45 minutes at the bench out front!
We both carry our cell phones (with consecutive numbers, that I bought, and pay for, each and every month) into the store, then, it is ok for me to go to video, audio, car (and kitchen! I am the cook in the family!).
As soon as she needs me, or wants my opinion, she rings me!
Look, I am not her love slave, even if I do want to be, but, to be healthy and sane, I need MY space, too! So, give your guy a bit of room and just call him when you are ready for him! You have all of your lives to be together, so, save some for later...
If he starts to see how cool you are with that, then he just might start to take those lessons in how to give morning massages and how to make the perfect breakfasts!
I also expect that there are times when it is important for her to go out with her girlfriends to Curves, to a party, or shopping. This marriage is about what we can bring to give to each other, not how much time we need to be reassured by our mate that we are still loved!
Besides, we see each other about 14 hours each weekday, even if we sleep 8 of them! Then, there are the full weekends! Give each other a little space, a bit of their own free time, so they keep it all sorted out. Everyone needs a bit of time to themselves each day.
I think you are going through a settling down period in your marriage. Just be cool like I can see that you are! You didn't slap him, and you are really great to be in such self-control, but, I hope you told him you were a bit peeved. Now, you two need to figure that all out. Talk to each other.
Bless you, and best wishes!
2006-11-12 23:30:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First...try to always remember that men and women do have some differences in their basic sense of humor. I have heard women tell jokes and make comments they think are funny and I fail to see the humor. Same with some jokes I made around my wife.
OK, I was married for 20 years and when my ex and I went shopping before,during and yes after our marriage I acted the same. I gave her my opinion wasn't insulting but did tell some stupid jokes...when people we not around people. But she also knew that she would have a more productive time shopping for her clothes without me. I was more than happy to give her my opinion when she got home...but if she was going to wear it I figure her opinion carried more weight.
When we shopped for just about anything else together...cars, homes, furniture...even grocery shopping we tried to come to an agreement on our decisions...or continued to look else where.
You friend was rude to make such a comment in ear shot of other.
But to tell you the truth, I am willing to bet I am the exception to how guys act after getting married however.
2006-11-12 23:19:59 · answer #4 · answered by iraq51 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been married for 7 yrs and yes they get so anal when its your time to shop . it could be for shoes or just going the grocery . they hate to shop now if u buy them a ipod with nothing but NFL and NBA all the best games oh they'll be thrilled to shop. My hubby acts such a malebitch when we have to shop . So i leave him at home and get to enjoy shopping by myself.. You messed up taking him out the house today during the NFL games and it was quite a few that he missed and he is pissed right now.
2006-11-12 23:12:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course, because YOUR man does it, that mean EVERY man does it.
Look, I dont mean to sound rude, but why not deal with the problem instead of generalizing it to everyone else of the same group? I think that would be a lot better.
2006-11-13 01:34:05 · answer #6 · answered by I'm Still Here 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋