There is this guy I know that I like, and he seems to like me--but I can't help but get mixed feelings. I'm not the greatest. I mean, is there something wrong with this guy? I'm f/23, 5'9". I weigh 165 lbs. My cheeks are masked in ance scars, however, they are not deep. If someone stands 10 feet away from me, they can't see them. Actually, my face is rather pretty if you overlook the scars. But, I'm also overweight.
I know he isn't gay, but I just can't help but think that he is either werid, pulling my leg, or has really low self-esteem. Which is why I do not have enough confidence around him... When he smiles at me kinda sweetly, my first thought is "What does he see in me...?" And when I see him across the room looking at me, I want to go over to him, but then I remember what I look like...
Can it ACTUALLY be possible that he isn't weird, pulling my leg, or has low self-esteem? Or is it just me? I thought guys, who have nothing wrong with them, like their women slim, shapely, and have a perfect face.
2006-11-12 10:33:58 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
its your lack of confidence talking, most men dont like skinny girls, homosexual dress designers want wonen to look like boys, men like a bit of meat to hang on to, may be he doesnt care about your acne scars becuse he figured out long ago he isnt going to date naomi campbell, the scars are your hang up not his, men dont look a woman with a magnfiying glass, sure your imperfect but guess what he is too
why doent he ask you out perhaps it is becuse being reject hurst and makes you feel bad, we cant read minds and men dont do subtle , make it blindly obvious that yoyu want to go out with him, suject a movie
try have you see such and such movie yet if he sayes no say your not doing anything saturday night and dont have anyone to go with, that way it isnt a date but it could be
2006-11-12 10:40:45 · answer #1 · answered by Bryn L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your only imperfection is your own low self esteem. Be proud of who you are. You sound like an OK person. Don't get hung up on looks. Looks are superficial. If you're a loving, caring person, that shows through. Maybe that is what the guy who shows interest in you can see.
One of my nephews married a woman much older than himself. She is grossly overweight, has no teeth in her mouth, yet he still loves her. He himself is good looking for a guy. Slim, muscular.
Don't be too hard on yourself, girl.
If your being a little overweight is a problem to your self esteem. Then start watching what you eat. Cut back a little. Nothing too severe, because long term, that won't work.
You could also try Vitamin E oil on your face. Great for healing scar tissue.
Don' let this opportunity pass you by.
2006-11-12 10:40:34 · answer #2 · answered by eddie_schaap 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your problem isn't whether or not he likes you....you don't like yourself. what person on this earth is pure perfection? doesn't sound like he has low self-esteem.....you do!
you need to look past the physical because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and if he's interested in you, he obviously understands what that saying means.
slim, shapley, and a pretty face does not perfection make. you're too hung upon your appearance which dissatisfies you. so, you should take steps to improve your appearance for yourself, not because of what you perceive, not because of pictures you see in a magazine, and not because of the women you see in public.
until you get right with yourself, and correct the problems YOU see in your image, you will forever doubt anyone's feelings for you and you'll always be miserable.
2006-11-12 10:46:49 · answer #3 · answered by loving 40+ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I read this, my first thought was he's thinking exactly what your thinking only his thoughts are if you notice his imperfections. I'm sure he wonders if I say hello to her she's gonna think I'm a dork, or she so smart why would she look at a guy like me. Girl put all those thoughts aside a go get that great guy that's waiting for you to just say hello and break the ice. He's shy so you gotta start it.
2006-11-12 10:46:41 · answer #4 · answered by tori 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut yourself some slack, hon. There is no one on the planet who has a partner with a perfect body. He must see something in you, so take a chance. And honestly, for your height, I don't see how you're overweight. I am sure you are very pretty, but if you continue to doubt yourself, you could miss out on a really great guy! Good luck to you!
2006-11-12 10:38:43 · answer #5 · answered by Moxie Crimefighter 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've never met a person in my life who was "physcially perfect" so I'm not sure where you got that idea sweetie.
Learn to like you...if you don't like your weight, then change it...if your scars bother you, then wear makeup....what matters is that you like who you see when you look in the mirror...if you don't like you, how can you expect anyone else to?
Give the guy a chance...don't assume he's shallow and small minded simply because you have an incorrect stereotype of males...that does a disservice to all the millions of guys on the planet who DO look beyond the scars, the fat, the bad hair, the lazy eye, the small boobs, etc in women and see the person inside...
We don't know this guy, so can't know his true feelings or motives...but what would it hurt to find out? Go for it...
2006-11-12 10:39:20 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
How is your personality? That may be what is attracting him to you. You see, love is blind.
Listen to this carefully: "BEAUTY IS SKIN DEEP, UGLY IS TO THE BONE? This means that the most beautiful girl in the world can be ugly as sin because of her personality and other traits, while the less beautiful girl may be BEAUTIFUL underneath her skin.
Let me tell you something. Most "young" men DO look for the "perfect" woman but just how many actually gets the perfect woman? I bet the percentage is very low.
Another thought: IF and I say IF something were to happen to my spouse, I would look for one thing FIRST in another wife and that is COMPATIBILITY. She would HAVE to be compatibility with me before anything else was discussed. It wouldn't matter if she were heavy, not pretty, not beautiful.......compatibility first and then the other traits would come in somewhere below in requirements. Get my point? Good luck!! Pops
2006-11-12 10:42:57 · answer #7 · answered by Pops 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Weight: 3 Muscle: 2 Body Shape: 2 Face Shape:1 Skin Tone/Race: 3 Hair Color: Light Blond Eye Color: Blue or Green
2016-03-19 06:56:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have some confidence in yourself everyone no matter what they look like has a soul mate out there, don't scare the guy away, get to know him, and stop being so hard on yourself. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
2006-11-12 10:39:43 · answer #9 · answered by lara 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are right - ""guys, who have nothing wrong with them, like their women slim, shapely, and have a perfect face."""
but then at the same time - we can't resist girls who are simply nice and caring. inclination towards looks is just a matter of few days, after that the face which used to be so pretty - is just ok now- after this what matters is "nature of a person". what matters the most is if he cares or not / or if you care or not.
guys who dont value - a kind, lovable, caring person what do u think is that guy thinking anyways. would you want to be his gf?????
2006-11-12 10:45:17 · answer #10 · answered by i don know y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋