A man staggers into an A&E with a golf club wrapped around his throat. Concerned, the doctor asks what happened. "Well," begins the man, "I was having a quiet game of golf with the wife when she sliced her ball into a field full of cows. We went to look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed one of these cows had something small and white in its backside. I walked over, lifted up its tail and, sure enough, there was the wife's golf ball lodged right in the middle of its ar*e...and that's when I made my mistake."
"What did you do?" asks the doc.
"I yelled to my wife; "Hey" This looks like yours!"
<><><><><><><>
Patrick is walking down the street when he notices his grandfather sitting on his porch, in a rocking chair - with nothing on from the waist-down. "Grandpa," he asks, "why are you sitting out here half-naked?"
The old man looked at him sheepishly.
"Well," he said, "Last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck. This was your Grandmother's idea."
2006-11-12 09:25:41 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Brent - I live on the Emerald Isle (\(*;*)
2006-11-12 09:49:01 · update #1
Well done, you don't sound like a Yank to me. I hope not for your sake. Let me know with an edit please. !!!!!!! thought not, nice to meet you, drop me a line sometime. I'm really pleased for you, you know how I feel about the Yanks but I love the Irish ( well the women anyway) oops thought i'd better let you know. Don't want to be mistaken for a rear gunner. See ya.
2006-11-12 09:39:28 · answer #1 · answered by Shredder 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Love them fidgety. Here,s a rude one for you.
Jack and Flo went to stay for a weekend with his parents.There wasn't much room in the tiny flat so Jack ended up sleeping with his dad.In the middle of the night he got an elbow in the ribs.
"Jack,Jack," whispered his dad "I'm going next door to give your mum a good rogering!"
"What! Dad,it's the middle of the night and you're 75 years old."
"Yes,but I've got such a mighty fine erection-the first for 15 years-and I don't want to waste it,son."
"Well in that case,I'll have to come with you,"said Jack.
"You're holding my knob."
2006-11-13 04:38:59 · answer #2 · answered by the gunners 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Brilliant! Grandma's a smart lady.
2006-11-12 09:28:08 · answer #3 · answered by aureliusrocker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one.
2006-11-12 09:27:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the second ones good
2006-11-12 09:28:55 · answer #5 · answered by Emily S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont get the question! Maybe there should be a jokes or statement page set up on here!
2006-11-12 09:28:13 · answer #6 · answered by noggintrude 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Hilarious!!!!!
2006-11-12 09:44:44 · answer #7 · answered by jennav 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
funny
2006-11-12 09:37:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
funny
2006-11-12 09:29:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yup yup yup yup yup...
tee hee tee hee tee hee
In other words...
I like your style - you made me laugh so much that I read them out to my husband!
(he liked them too)
2006-11-12 10:02:58 · answer #10 · answered by franja 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋