The man was told he had twenty four hours to live
He couldnt change what he was told,
no matter how much he wanted to give
At home he sat in his usual chair;
with his hand he made one swoop through his hair.
He got up and headed for the door,
opening it up to a world that twenty four hours from now he will see no more.
Slamming the door shut he swung around,
walking through his house,
searching for something that will never be found.
A few tears rolled down his cheeks,
off his chin on to his rugged looking sneaks.
It made him feel good to know that within himself he could confide.
At least he knew he still had a little bit of pride.
Wiping the tears away, he knelt down and began to pray.
He knew this was the last thing he could give,
within his last twenty four hours to live.
Just wantin to know if this is alright. I wrote this awile back. Be honest you wont hurt my feelings.
2006-11-12 06:25:07 · 14 answers · asked by melucknope 1 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
i like it
2006-11-12 06:27:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're talented, but you should post it in the Arts & Humanities section-- they probably have a place for poetry-- Also, be careful where you display your work, as there are people out there who will plagarize it. I would be a shame if someone else tried to take credit for something you came up with. (I know it's tempting, though, I'm a poet, also. I've been debating on posting one that I wrote to my father about what it was like to be his daughter. -He passed away in 2000, but got to hear it beforehand, and I read it at his funeral. -- This isn't about me, though, sorry for rambling!!) Good luck!
2006-11-12 15:33:28 · answer #2 · answered by BetchaBiteAChip 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one, a poor/sad man out there
2006-11-12 14:27:51 · answer #3 · answered by Pd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was pretty lame. It didn't really explore anything and I think the rhyming interfered with what you were trying to say.
2006-11-12 14:31:30 · answer #4 · answered by anonymous 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you did a good job, it brings back some memories
2006-11-12 14:29:47 · answer #5 · answered by wildeagle63 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its an awsome poem you did a great job.:)
2006-11-12 14:28:07 · answer #6 · answered by Charliee[[JB]]<33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that is good and sad and i dont usually enjoy poetry
2006-11-12 14:50:18 · answer #7 · answered by kd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like it
2006-11-12 15:02:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice, it's better than anything that i can do.
2006-11-12 14:40:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I LIKE IT I WRITE POEMS MYSELF
2006-11-12 14:33:35 · answer #10 · answered by starlight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋