My boyfriend and I have known eachother since August, and we know that we want to get married, probably the middle of next year. I think he's going to propose officially soon. Just looking for some opinions- are we moving too fast?
2006-11-12 05:29:21 · 30 answers · asked by jerimbato 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If the relationship has been good and based on honesty, I think it's ok. Besides that, you will be engaged for awhile so that gives you more time to get to know more about each other before getting married.
2006-11-12 05:32:09 · answer #1 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is too short of a time. In my opinion no one knows who they get married to. I mean even if you've known or been with that special person for 3 months; 8 months; or a full year or two, you don't get to know who that person really is until you actually get married to one another and start spending the whole day and night with each other. Some may become nicer and some mean. Things are always different when just going out with each other, that person treats you like a Queen, but once married all that will change, in a positive or negative way. But remember love can do it all. Everybody gets married with love, it's just the lifestyle and differnet attitudes you will have to live with or try to change. Good Luck, No time is too soon or too long to get engaged.
2006-11-12 07:12:01 · answer #2 · answered by Gemini 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may be, you may not be. It depends on how you feel.
I moved in with my boyfriend after only one month of being together. I'm still with him three plus years later, and the only thing stopping us from getting married is money, honestly. We knew within the first week of meeting each other that we were meant to be together.
Some people say age makes a difference. If you are 18, you might want to take your time. A lot of maturing happens between 18 and 21. Hell, between 21 and 23, a lot of stuff can happen.
If you feel uncertain, listen to that inner voice, and ask your boyfriend if you can slow down. Trust yourself. Don't be pressured by anyone to make a decision that isn't true to what you want. But if you think it's right, go with it.
If it wasn't right, it'll be a learning experience. :)
2006-11-12 05:33:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends upon your maturity and knowing what you want. Please don't mistake "maturity" with "age". I know some people in their 50's that still have screwed up love lives and some that have gotten marriend in their teens that are doing very well.
The important thing is being honest with yourself. Do not go into this relationship with "blinders on".
I usually describe the beginning of a relationship as the "fantasy" phase. You do not see the flaws or if you do, you discount the seriousness of them. This is why honesty with yourself is so important. For example, it may not bother you that he doesn't have a job now but in a few years it probably will.
This part of the relationship is also quite lustful; It is very very difficult to seperate lust from love during the fantasy phase.
I've noticed that many people that seemingly rush into a marriage have some self-esteem issues: "He is so perfect, how can he actually love me?" Do not put him up on a pedestal. Everyone has their flaws.
With maturity comes this honesty. You will know what you want and you will not have to ask "are we moving to fast?"
2006-11-12 05:51:15 · answer #4 · answered by my2cents 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Typically couples wait at least 2 solid years of dating to consider marriage, but the max is a year. It's not like your parents where they got engaged after a few months and stayed married for many years.
2006-11-12 06:55:35 · answer #5 · answered by nabdullah2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should take more time. Being engaged that quickly is OK but you should make the wedding later - not next year. Be engaged for awhile first. Live together for at least a year and spend more time with eachother first - also do alot of counseling
2006-11-12 06:14:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nah, why not... my grandparents knew each other 2 weeks, and got married. Been together ever since! Course, things were quite different back then.
If he asks, get engaged. But dont jump into marriage until you both think your ready. Dont let people push you. EVEN if you get pregnant. Just because people get 'pg' they feel pressure into marriage, when in fact its not always the best thing to do. Take your time, you'll find out.. theres loads of things you dont know about him and you just may change your mind. Good Luck....
2006-11-12 05:43:40 · answer #7 · answered by debs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love each other, than no. And if you have to think about whether or not you really love each other you are not really in love. My husband and I knew each other a mere three months before getting engaged. Of course our engagement lasted a bit over a year but all the same. Love is love and there is no better explanation then that.
2006-11-12 06:48:24 · answer #8 · answered by bubb1e_gir1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes it's alittle fast! slow down.. life is hard enough sometimes without rushing head first into things like that. People now days don't take marriage as serious as they should. Don't think about getting married until your sure that you can wake up to the same person everyday! Don't jump in just for the sake of saying you married! Divorce sucks!!
2006-11-12 05:43:05 · answer #9 · answered by fatbrat64 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not knowing anything about you and your personal situation, it is hard to say. What age are you, do you have jobs, did you finish school, is this a remarriage for anyone of you, do you have any children from other relationships, how do you see your future together, how deep is your love, did you go through some rough times together (money problems, arguments, health problems etc.). Make sure you are engaged long enough to answer all relevant questions with "Yes, no problem, I love him endlessly!"
2006-11-12 05:40:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋