To make a long story short.. I just recently broke up with my bf of 5 years because he is jewish and I am not. He didnt break up with me saying it was over forever, he just said "There is no doubt in my mind I love you. I would propose today. But Im just confused. I dont want to disappoint my family and history." So... We basically talk everydya. Usually turns into an argument. He freaks out. Says really mean things (he is normally the sweetest guy ever!). And he is so strong. In the past during a short breakup he has later admitted that he wouldnt call even though he really really wanted to... So basically he tells me he misses me. He says he loves me. But then he gets frustrated when the converstation gets heavy and yells and says "Its over, I never want to see you again. I dont care what you do" What does this all mean? Is it completely over? And what do I do about it?
2006-11-12 03:00:23 · 15 answers · asked by leebee1234567 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A religious Jewish man can't marry a non-Jewish woman because in their faith, thereligion of the children is the religion of the mother. If you want to marry this guy, you need to convert to his faith. My suggestion is to not do it because women are not treated equally in some Jewish sects.
2006-11-12 03:04:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
This brings back memories . . . I was in the same situation once, many years ago. I was madly in love (really in love, too) with a Jewish guy, and I am sure he loved me too. I am not Jewish and his family strongly disapproved of our relationship. It was a terrible struggle and we kept breaking up and getting back together. Finally I could not stand it anymore, broke up with him for good (it helped that he moved thousands of miles away) and moved on. With the benefit of many years of hindsight, I can see that I did the right thing, even though I did love him very much. I've been through a lot in my life and I understand that love isn't everything in a marriage. Situations such as your in-laws hating your guts can make life too difficult to bear . . . and religious differences are among the most tragic ones because everyone thinks they have God on their side.
You seem like a thoughtful person who is in a lot of pain and even after the many years that have gone by for me, I remember what that was like . . . it was so hard to walk away . . . but if I had it to do over again, I'd do the same thing.
2006-11-12 03:15:13 · answer #2 · answered by Helen W. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, its sounds like he loves you very much. The man is just conflicted due to the religion thing. If you love him and want to be with him, I would suggest you at least consider converting. Have you talked about it with him? See if that would make things easier for you guys. Honestly, right now is the time for you to reevaluate your feelings about this guy because you're either going to get in deeper now or completely end things. If you do not want to convert, I would try to make a clean break so that you can move on and so he can do the same. Sorry it came down to that sweetie.
2006-11-14 02:35:23 · answer #3 · answered by CandyAppleRed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if there is a family problem of ur BF then it means he is serious, because it seems he likes u and cares for u but at the same time he also respects his family and his culture, and he may not leave his family for u , if u want to be with him then ask him if he could leave his family and u both can start living somewhere else, i mean start a new life
2006-11-12 03:06:13 · answer #4 · answered by engr_ehsen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that it is over, if he really loves you like he says he does, he wouldnt break up with u just cuz hes jewish, if he really loved you, he wouldnt care about his religion, he would want to do anything to be with you
2006-11-12 03:04:39 · answer #5 · answered by aprildarcie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes it's best to just end things. Cut your losses and move on. When it comes to a religion, people get pretty serious about it, and even if he isn't serious about his, you better believe his family is. Unless he wants to endure a lifetime of critisim from his family he has to end it with you. That wouldn't be fair to either of you because they would be making you miserable if you actually married him.
2006-11-12 03:05:35 · answer #6 · answered by Corona 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you consider converting to Judaism for him? If yes, tell him so. Maybe that will solve the problem and let you move forward as a couple. If you are not open to that, then I think you should treat your relationship as over and move on.
2006-11-12 03:04:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he looses control , so even if you get back together , how long before he looses control , you said he is so strong , do you mean controls all the situations (dominate) , perhaps you were under his influence and very submissive before ,(agreeable) and now you challenge him in conversations and that's what makes him angry , sounds like some issues , I think you should move on and find a better chose
2006-11-12 03:20:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oy vay. All I can say is this, you two will have some kind of contact until he finds himself a nice Yiddish girl from the east side who is good with money and her last name ends with -stein.
2006-11-12 03:14:13 · answer #9 · answered by Shadow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a nice gentile. Let him find him a Jewish girl. He is too confused to be in a relationship with you. Find someone who can love you for you not for who your parents where.
2006-11-12 03:04:15 · answer #10 · answered by ♂ Randy W. ♂ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋