How can the personality differences be resolved in this relationship when 2 people desperately love each other

Question

My bf and I typically get along great. However, there are some aspects of his personality that make it difficult to be with him. At the same time, there are some aspects of my personality that don't always make it any better. 90% of the time, we're great. We love each other deeply, and it's painful to consider that we won't be together, and we can't figure things out as to why some things reoccur. We really want to work things out, but we're afraid of causing each other pain (mostly he's afraid of causing me pain, but I think about this also). Part of me wants to give up, but another part of me doesn't - I feel like I'd be letting the love of my life slip through my fingers. We tend to communicate well, but it's mostly after the fact...we need to learn how to better communicate in the midst of a disagreement. Is my best option to just leave him alone during disagreements and wait for things to subside? I want us to start fresh - should we spend some time apart or would that be worse?

Answer 1

The reason you feel like you should let it go is because your worying about it. There are two ideas i can suggest.

taking a break, or time apart, is sometimes healthy for any relationship, if you disagree but love each other then that may be a good path to take, just make sure you say its a break, not a BREAK UP.

or, spend some quality time together, go on romantic dates, put all the stuff aside, learn about his past, where he comes from, silly little things he did when he was a kid. Getting to his roots and understanding him will show him how much you love him and want it to work, he'll respect that.

Good Luck ^_^

Answer 2

It takes two people to have a relationship. You do not say whether or not these problems are recent. If they are, perhaps the impending wedding is causing some stresses. If the relationship has been like this all along, you may consider taking a break from each other and see how you feel. Relationships are not created without a lot of work. Communication being the most important and hardest to achieve. Personal differences can be solved if there is mutual respect. After three years you two should have started on the right foot to achieve these. How can you love some one you are unhappy with? Good luck!

Answer 3

There are many 'differences' that couples can overcome and lead happy lives together. However, there are some that make for an unhealthy relationship and you should call it quits while you can....you don't really say what these differences are, so I can't know which category you fall under. Generally, if these differences don't undermine your physical, emotional or mental health, you can work them out.
If they are just differences that cause annoyances, inconveniences every once in awhile, there are many ways to deal with them. One--relationships don't just make themselves, they need work and effort from the two people involved! Make sure you are purposely setting aside time every week to do the things you enjoy doing together. Don't just rely on empty time being filled up with fun out of luck--plan time together that will focus on your similarities and build bonding. That kind of bonding will help you deal with the indifferences with more patience and respect.
Two- people should never have to 'fake' enjoying something that their partner likes, but it's a very lovely gesture every once in awhile to go along with what they like--whether that be an activity, or biting your lip during a conversation where you want to debate their point (not for really important things, mind you, but if it's unimportant and silly, let them have their moment--this goes both ways, you both have to do it for each other) I wouldn't reccomend doing this as often as you do the things you like together--it will just make you resentful and bored. Maybe once a month you can each do something that the other person likes, discuss something in detail that the other person is interested in, take time to learn something the other likes. Perhaps plan a date for the other that you know they would enjoy, and not depend on them to plan the activity they want to do.
Third-allow each other time apart to do the things that you each like.
I know that all of these things aren't necessarily 'personality differences' But you'll find that doing these things that respect each other's different interests builds up patience and repsect, which helps you deal with personality differences better--helps you to not think it's the most important thing in the world to always be right, even if its at the expense of each other's feelings.

Answer 4

No one is ever going to have the same views or opinions or personalities. You don't have to continue the relationship, but if you think he's the one, the one you wanna marry, and the one you want to spend your life with, you gotta make an effort-both of you. My honey is stubborn too. Just like me. You know what I learned? That you have to let him have his opinion. He is entitled to, just like you. You might think of it as agreeing to disagree. If you love someone, you love someone-good and bad. Nothing is perfect...make sure the positive outweighs the negetive. We all have little quirks!

Answer 5

Do your best to accept each others personality traits, other than that communication is the key, the two of you need to talk about things before problems arise, and cause issues....

If it helps i know how you feel, my husband and i are the same way.....he doesnt understand that he needs to communicate with me, for things to be dealt with properly......

Answer 6

give more time....to each other
like spending time together always might be bored
bcos u meet each other and its like seeing my face and ur face
it get pretty boring...
trust me.....