Getting pregnant by an illegal alien who is married to someone else and having a baby out of wedlock when he is not even around, or smoking a joint? I'm the one who smoked a joint by the way, and I've always been considered the bad guy by my stepmother, this other girl's mother. I think my stepmother has been abusive to me for many years because I smoked a joint. Big deal, I tried drugs, didn't like them and quit many years ago. I thought I was normal like many people. My stepmother is a bigot and doesn't think so. She came from an alcoholic family when she remarried my father and is always pointing the finger because I smoked a joint. But her daughter is perfect. I think my stepmother is mean. Her son smoked weed and it was fine for him to smoke weed! She's a bigot.
2006-11-11 14:40:01 · 17 answers · asked by WhiteRain 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
the girl is worse than you. you need to get away from that family. at least you can admit you've made a mistake and they can not. i'd say as soon as you're 18 find somewhere else to go.
2006-11-11 16:01:44 · answer #1 · answered by angelica 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you should feel the need to compare yourself to others in order to make yourself seem better. Everyone makes mistakes and regrets things. There is obviously a lot of competition in the family, likely instigated by your stepmother. If she feels you are somehow less perfect of a human being for smoking a joint, that's her own ignorance. If it is affecting you and your self-esteem, then you guys should talk about it without getting angry, if possible. Or you should write her a letter with your feelings in it. Whatever you do, you should not feel the need to pull her daughter into the discussion. By judging someone else for what they've done wrong (in your opinion), you're only doing the very thing that your stepmother is doing to you.
2006-11-11 14:47:54 · answer #2 · answered by Shawna Q 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes just growing up the stepchild you get looked down on no matter what you do, right or wrong. Try not to let it affect your self esteem or judgement on the person that you are. Obviously SHE has her own personal issues. Besides that if HER OWN daughter got pregnant at 17 by ANYONE then her parenting skills aren't right up there with June Cleaver's.
I will agree with her that smoking the joint (or trying any illegal drug) at your age is not right but then this is the year 2006 and by most kids teenage years they have tried some sort of drug...some far worse than Marijuana.
Have you tried talking to your Father about the way you feel about the way she treats you? Or a School Counselor or Relative? If it is serious as you feel then you should talk to someone. Good luck to you.
2006-11-11 14:55:38 · answer #3 · answered by sarteaga1970 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Instead of yelling, try dropping your voice. It will probably take everything you have, because you'll be angry/upset/etc., but it will catch her attention. Kids at that age (and ongoing from there) tend to escalate really quickly, and they will fight just for the sake of fighting, because they want to be right and assert themselves as being independent from you. So if you stay calm, she has less to build on. When she raises her voice, just let her know that you're not up for it (again, in a quiet voice), and walk away. Wait until she cools off before pursuing it, and don't pursue it if it's just a small thing. Choose your battles--just major things rather than daily hassles. She may well believe that she hates you, but if you consistently love her and show her that she will eventually get over that phase and once again be able to show you that she does love you. It's possible to love someone and hate them at the same time (I'm a parent--I feel like that all the time about my 2 year old!). Stick to your guns on the really important issues (e.g., her safety, your core values), and try to let some things go. If it makes her feel like she's being independent because she gets to do something you may dislike (e.g., dying her hair; piercing something relatively innocent), it may ward off a bigger battle over something more serious and potentially very dangerous (e.g., going out with a really awful friend and drinking). Hope this helps.
2016-05-22 06:21:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first one is definitely worse. While I don't condone the use of any illegal drugs, I think that your stepmother needs to gain some perspective.
2006-11-11 16:29:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like a typical bigot stepmother to me. and yes i totally agree that smoking a joint was not all that bad. I feel for you having to have a step mother like that.
2006-11-11 14:53:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
id say that smoking a joint once in your life is not a life altering thing. Big deal. your stepmother needs to chill.
2006-11-11 14:42:44 · answer #7 · answered by Jaylee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting pregnant by a married man is alot worse. It's normal for kids to experience with pot..as long as it does not become a habit.
2006-11-11 23:28:23 · answer #8 · answered by KathyS 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MAYBE YOU STEPMOTHER WANTED HER DAUGHTER TO BE MORE LIKE YOU. DON'T WORRY ABOUT ANY OF IT ANYMORE, SHE MAY ALWAYS LOOK DOWN ON YOU. YOU JUST CONTINUE TO BE THE BIGGER PERSON BY HAVING A GOOD LIFE AND TRY TO BE THE BEST YOU CAN BE.
2006-11-11 16:14:42 · answer #9 · answered by BLUE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say getting PG by an illegal alien...smoking a joint once ur life doesnt mean anything just bout everyone does it....i think ur step mom needs to get her head outta her ***
2006-11-11 14:49:28 · answer #10 · answered by butterfly_84_2004 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋