Why do i feel like its a no win battle?

Question

I am always stuck in the middle between my husband and children. My husband is a very controlling man. When he wants somthing done he wants it done now. He gets yelling a screaming and always the kids run to me.He likes things his way or the highway. He is always saying go to mommy shell give you what you want she always does. It dont help when his sister is always saying that we let the kids do what they want. I do not believe in hitting my children but his sister is forever saying theres nothing wrong with a slap on the ***. Weve tried that it dont work. As my oldest son gets older their fights are more like brother fights then parent and child. I feel like my husband is very childish. My oldest son wouldnt clean his room so my husband picked everything up off the floor and threw it in the garbage. Of course my sond yugioh cards where part of that clean up and that started a fight. Then i had my parents phoning me and says what right does he have to throw my oldest sons cards out.

I have no problem with having someone work with us which i am but my usband hates it. Its a no win battle.

My oldest also has a learing disablitlty and will be gettn tested for other things. Ive got organizations working with us. Things will work out but it just seems like its taking forever.

Answer 1

Tell your parents and sister-in-law that they have no say in how you and your husband raise your children. It's inappropriate for them to interfere and get between the two of you. Your husband might benefit from some anger management classes to help deal with the yelling. Discipline has to be something the two of you agree on otherwise it's useless. The kids pick up on the mixed messages. Maybe the two of you should sit down and discuss what appropriate behavior is for your children and how you both will deal with them breaking house rules in a way you both can agree on. I hope that helped. Good luck.

Answer 2

You need to seek marriage counseling and he needs anger managment classes. You also need family counseling. Although, your son should have cleaned up his room before it got to the point where your husband threw the things away. If he cared so much about his cards he should have taken care of them. It sounds like your husband's parents were controlling and that is where he and his sister learned this behavior.

Answer 3

Sounds as if family counseling is needed as soon as possible!
Your parents should not be part of the equation unless there is child beating.etc. If your husband won't go, go anyway. Good luck!

Answer 4

Counseling

Answer 5

It is hard to have to mother your kids, and then turn around and your husband want to act like the biggest baby of them all. I don't know what kind of advise I can give you other than seek out maritial counseling.

Best wishes for you and your family

Answer 6

You and your husband need parenting classes. He needs to realize that it's no fun growing up with a bully and that's what he is.
You need to learn how to talk to him and your children. There has to be a balance between the parents, when it comes to discipline, one cannot and should not be the only disciplinarian in the family.
I feel sorry for your children. Please seek help!

Answer 7

I think once you are into the marriage counseling that should help.
yes, it does take forever. but you need to get this out in the open, and let your husband see his flaws in this as well.

Answer 8

I think you could be right, it sounds like a "heads they win, tails you lose".

It may be time to go radical. Book yourself in to a health spa for a week, and let them get on with it. Then, tell them you MAY consider doing it more often, unless .......

Answer 9

he is very abusive. I would make plans in order to get out.

Answer 10

see a family doc..psychiatrist.