Is she normal?

Question

13 yo stepdaughter shows no empathy towards anyone. She never seems happy or sad. She never gets excited about things. She is very selfish. She made her dad cry and she brags about it to her friends. She won't talk to us. Whenever we ask her if something is wrong, she says "I don't know". We cannot get her to talk. Took her to counseling and she wouldn't talk. At our wit's end. We don't know what to do with her. Is this normal behavior? What else can we do?

Answer 1

My older sister is like that. It's either a behavioral disorder or something that happened that made her decide she was going to close up, and not feel anymore. Keep in mind that you can't "fix" or "change" her...and get a hold of a counselor you can talk to, while your daughter is not around, to see what they think. Maybe there's things both of you need to change. If it gets worse, call Dr.Phil, he's good with that stuff.

Answer 2

Just let her know that she's loved... teenage years can be very trying for parents and teens... it's the time when she'll find her own identity and her own way of communicating with you.

Forcing the issue may only push her away. I was not very communicative with my mum when I was that age, but now we are close... it just took me time.

...as for bragging to her mates about making her dad cry... that's just her finding out that she has some control over you... it's probably normal, but I'm sure you are worried. If you can't talk to her normally, try a letter or an e-mail explaining how you feel, but not putting pressure on her.

I hope it all works out, just be patient with her. x

Answer 3

THESE TYPES OF BEHAVIOR COME FROM FEELINGS OF BEING BETRAYED AT YOUNGER AGE BY SOMEONE THAT SHE LOVED AND OR PUT HER TRUST INTO AT THAT YOUNG AGE, THESE ARE FEELINGS OF INSECURITY'S AND A SIGN OF EMOTIONAL TRAUMA . WHAT SHE NEEDS IS TO FEEL LOVED BY THE PARENT OR A STEP PARENT,THE MORE THAT SHE SEES THAT YOU REALLY CARE ABOUT HER THE BETTER THAT SHE SHOULD GET, THE MORE THAT SHE FEELS LIKE SHE IS BEING CONTROLLED THE WORSE THE BEHAVIOR COULD BECOME. MY ADVICE IS TO SHOW AS MUCH LOVE TO HER AS YOU CAN ENOUGH THAT SHE FEELS THAT YOU LOVE HER IN THE GOOD AND IN THE BAD IN SUCCESS AND IN FAILURE,THIS IS ESPECIALLY IMPORTANT IN THESE TEENAGE YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT, SHE WILL THANK YOU WHEN SHE IS OLDER , JUST DO WHAT YOU CAN TO ENCOURAGE HER AND UPLIFT HER. YOU NEVER KNOW MAYBE SHE WILL BE THE NEXT OPERA OR SOMEONE ELSE SUCCESSFUL. HER BEHAVIOR IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE EXCEPT WITH TIME (REMEMBER THIS) AND THE MORE YOU SHOW THAT YOU CARE THE MORE THAT SHE WILL FEEL LIKE SHE CAN TRUST YOU AND THAT SHE HAS SOMEONE TO TALK TO ! THINK ABOUT HOW YOU FELT AT THIS AGE. ( READ 1 CORINTHIANS 13:4-8 )

Answer 4

Honestly, if it isn't just plain teenage rebellion, then it could possibly be a mental disorder. Have you tried asking her what she wants? If she answers something like "a new toy" or "a later curfew" then you know it's materialistic and she's doing it to get what she wants.
Have you also tried not paying attention to her? If it gets worse if you ignore her, then she's looking for attention.

However, that does sound an awful like the premature stages of schizoid personality disorder.
It's characterized by:
- not wanting or enjoying close relationships, including being part of a family
- not having strong emotions
- almost always choosing to be by themselves
- not taking pleasure in activities
- lacking close friends
- not caring about praise or criticism from others
- seeming detached, unresponsive, or emotionally cold.

But hey; I can't tell you everything. Try doing a Google search. :)

Answer 5

all i had to do was read the word "stepdaughter" and i already came to the conclusion of the problem.

children in today's society have and will always have problems with there stepparents for the mere fact that the stepparent is not there original parents. as much as i hate to say it, there is nothing else you can do. if she won't open up to you guys now, then she probably never will because that is how she feels towards you.

Answer 6

I sympathize with you. This must be so diffucult for all of you. I think she is going through a phase which is pretty normal for the situation she finds herself in. Give her some time to come out of it. I went through the exact same situation and my stepdaughter got out of it on her own. Just be there for her if and when she needs you.

Answer 7

find her a friend i mean com on

she got to have like other people to talk to before something happend or something she's normal but she needs something to look on to everyday send her to public skool so she can have more friends that don't work [find her a friend] like ur friend's daughter or something i mean she 13 i bet she been through alot


i would no

Answer 8

Sorry to have to tell you this but she sounds quite normal to me. Best way to deal with it is ignore her bad behavior, she will hate it, when she stops getting all the attention she is seeking.

Answer 9

she doesnt like the change she wanted everything to stay the same way tell her that ure not here to replace her old but become her friend and mom

Answer 10

Either she has Aspergers or hates you. Stop giving her things, stop driving her places and take away all phone priv. See if she shows emotion then. That way you will see if it is Aspergers.