My son spends a lot of time at his grandmothers house. Now my son prefers to stay there, and i dont blame him bc he is like a king there. He will go and spend the night over there probably as much as he is here. I don't really mind bc hey love having him and he loves being there.
The thing is that he is potty trained. We worked on that for quite some time. The problem is that he wont go to the potty when he is at home. He will do all kinds of stuff at his grandmothers. He wil go potty b himself, get his own drinks, wash his hands, brush his teeth, and so much stuff independtly. When he comes home he reverts into a baby. He won't do anything for him self. I've tried and tried with rewards and punishments and talking to him. He has 2 younger brothers at home. I've thought about the attention thing, but he gets alot of attention and praise. How can i get him to be more independent at home?
He is a relativly good and smart boy.
2006-11-11 02:25:01 · 5 answers · asked by Mama of Cuties 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
It appears that grandma has it down right! He KNOWS that when he comes home...MOMMY will do it! So find out from grandma what she's doing right...and apply it to home. It may take some adjustment on his part to get used to the change..But he's going back to being a baby cause you would rather do it for him than....like grandma has figured...do it himself and be a big boy!
You know he's smart...cause he has you on your last wits end!!! LOL
2006-11-11 02:50:06 · answer #1 · answered by just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is your son? Boys do not completely potty train until almost the age of 3. Are you sure he uses the potty at the Grandparents or are the Grandparents just saying that he does?
He is absolutely vying for your attention; He knows he can get it by messing his pants. You should not punish him for this behavior because he wants you to pay more attention to him.
I think you should restrict him from the grandparents house and deal with this at home. He is going to get tired of messing in his pants and he will also be uncomfortable acting like a baby in front of his two younger brothers.
We used to put little briefs on my son and call them "big boys" because only big boys wore them. Make him proud he is bigger and growing up.
I had this situation with my parents always wanting my son to come to their home and keeping him all the time, spoiling, etc. I wish I had put my foot down and kept my son from all that spoiling because he would be a better man today. It is not too late for you to take back you son and let him feel he has a part in the family as the big brother.
Why not ask your son help you with the chores around the house and help in caring for his two brothers. Tell him he is growing up and he has to set a good example for the brothers and that it is a big task to change their pants and you would prefer if they could use the toilet. Let him watch you change the diapers and impress on him it is better to go in the commode. No kid can stand being called a baby or acting like a baby when they know better, eventually your son will want to grow up and get past the potty issue.
Also, if you can get him around a child that is about a year older then peer pressure is everything to kids. My son was finally potty trained when he got around my roommate's daughter. For some reason she was able to stress to h im that he was not a baby anymore and he needed to go to the potty on his own and she really helped him get over his issues with training.
Also, sending your son to pre-school for a few hours each week will get him around his peers and let him have fun with other kids, also make him embarrassed if he has to use diapers at nursery school.
2006-11-11 10:44:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well ask the grandmother what she does for him to listen to her. Maybe he thinks he can get away with things around you or maybe he doesn't like to be around his brothers. Also tell the boy that if he doesn't start listening to you that you aren't going to take him to see a movie or something like that. Don't bribe him to do the potty. What my uncle does is he has the potty training toilet by a wall then he has a sheet of paper taped above the toilet and every time his kids go potty in the toilet he puts a sticker on the sheet of paper and then by the time the kids reach 50 he takes them to a movie or buys them ice cream.
2006-11-11 10:41:51 · answer #3 · answered by babysunshine4114 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure he gets lots of love and attention. Make sure your house is set up so he can get his own drinks, wash his hands, etc. Then don't do it for him. He'll get thirsty enough. When he tells you he's thirsty tell him There's milk in the fridge if you'd like to go get it. Don't get it for him. He'll get it eventually. If it's something like washing his hands where he won't ever decide to do it on his own say "You can come have dinner with us as soon as you wash your hands." then stick by it. Be consistent.
2006-11-11 10:31:50 · answer #4 · answered by AerynneC 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe when he is home, have him start "teaching" his younger siblings how to use the potty and such. Like say to him, "Do you have to go potty? Would you help me and show (their name) how to do it?" And then actually take them in there with him like he is showing them and helping you. Same with washing hands and brushing teeth etc.....that might help....Good Luck!
2006-11-11 10:34:32 · answer #5 · answered by Shari 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋