Do you punish your child for screaming?

Question

My 2.5 yr old is so loud. Sometimes I just can't take it, when I am trying to hear what my husband is saying or when the baby is sleeping he'll scream so loud and I tell him "shhh baby is sleeping, please stop screaming" and he'll do it louder and nonstop just to get a rise out of me. I can ignore it most of the time but sometime it just really gets on my nerves and after warning him several times I just grab him and put him in his room and shut the door for 2 minutes. How does everyone else deal with it? And please don't tell me to ignore it, I mean sometimes I can't even get a word in edgewise at doctor's visits or speaking to someone important on the phone for 2 seconds.

if I ever threaten him with anything like "no toys unless you stop screaming" or if I take a toy away or turn off his facorite show he just screams more!!

Answer 1

Then do like you did. Put the screamer in another room. Don't get mad, just move his butt, tell him its not acceptable, and leave him in there till he stops screaming. I'd seperate him anytime he started that so he's realize that its not correct behavior and you aren't going to just put up with it. I am at the point now where I tell my kids to quit the screeching and they do, but it took time. Just make sure to not lose your cool and don't let him see a reaction from you. Once its no longer fun, he'll stop.

Answer 2

I think what you are doing is correct. Just ignoring the sound will work occasionally, but your child is doing it constantly. I would definitley not bribe your child, that will start other bad behaviors (ex., screaming until you tell him if he stops you'll buy him something, then stopping, just to get the item). The only real punishment is a time out, exactly what you are doing. Putting him in his room for 2 min. will help calm him down, and then think about trying to talk to him. Tell him what he's done wrong.

I would also suggest watching some of those TV shows such as Nanny 911. They might seem stupid, but it can help dealing with situations, such as this. A lot of these children can be way out of control, but the way she deals with things, could help you.

Answer 3

my son will be 2 in feb but does the exact same thing. My husband works night and has to sleep during the day so it can be really annoying. I know i'll probably get a lot of thumbs down for this but sometimes I get to the point where I can't take him screaming anymore and put him in his room. in there he can scream as much AS HE WANTS AND IT IS MUFFLED. As for a way to cure it...if ya find one let me know. trust me my son gets plenty of attention and he still screams. I ried talking and all that. the best thing I've found is just putting him inn his room and letting him scream there. Afer a while I'lltell him if he will stop he can come out an he complies.

Answer 4

It sounds to me like the problem is inconsistency. If you ignore it most of the time but sometimes punish him that won't teach him anything. If you are consistent he will quit. Also make sure you never scream at him, your husband, or anyone else so he has a good example to follow. You have to be willing to be consistent even if it's a bad time for you. For example, if he screams in the grocery store, pick him up and take him out. Leave the cart of food halfway full- just leave. Then go back later and don't take him with you- leave him with your husband or someone else. Make sure he knows why you're not taking him.

Also if he does it to "get a rise out of you" you need to make sure your reaction is calm, firm, and emotionless so there's no fun in watching the rise. If you're going to put him in his room, just pick him up and put him there. You can either not say a word or say "I'm putting you in your room because you're screaming." Either way be calm and emotionless. He'll figure it out. But you have to discipline him every time he does it or it will have no effect.

Answer 5

hi, as a child of this age especially when there's another younger baby, he tends to want to attract attention from you, thats why he will do these funny funny things to let you notice him, therefore perhaps you can make him occupied by getting him his favourite toys to play, or let him watch his favourite cartoon or maybe just give him a pen and paper jus let him draw whatever he wants. Most important is do not IGNORE him coz it will worsen the situation. if you want to put him somewer, do not put him in a place he's familar, example his room coz he will not feel the fear. Like my kids, if they cant keep themselves quiet despite to 3 times warning, they are to go to the store room without the light on. of coz they will be frighten or even cry louder, juz shut them in for about 5 mins, then before I let them out, I will warned the last time that if they make noise again, they are going in for a longer time. So if your child is afraid of the store room or any wer else in the house except his room, try put him in there, he will think twice the next time if he were to make noise again. (ps : dun put him in a danger place, make sure theres no dangerous stuff or window shut bfor you want to shut him out.) Try a few times it will work. But dun forget, after he quiet down, dun forget to praise him or jus a hug or kiss will makes him feel that you still loves him. (Child of his age needs a lot of praising!) Hope this can help you

Answer 6

Teach him that we have a volume control, just like the radio or the television. Teach him that "inside" voices are for inside and "outside" voices are for outside. Make sure he gets enough time to use both. When you are outside with him, make a point of reminding him that you are outside and can be very loud!

You cannot ignore it when he screams for no reason, but you need to make sure that he doesn't actually have a reason. Generally kids scream because they want attention and a 2.5 year old is a perfect candidate, especially since you have another child. Make sure you give him a bit of your time everyday that is just HIS. Even if it's just 15 minutes reading a book to him, going for a little walk or playing with a ball, anything that requires you to give him, and only him, your time.

Chances are he already resents the baby, simply for being, but he'll get over that once the baby is at a more interactive age. Do not make the connection for him that his behavior is dependent on the baby, "sshh, the baby is sleeping" will only make it worse. Actually, while the baby is sleeping would be a perfect time for you to spend a bit with your son.

So, in a nutshell, if he screams inside you say "Inside voices, please" and LISTEN to what he has to say. Incidently, it's never too early to teach them to say "Excuse me" and wait for a response. If he insists on screaming, you have to learn to ignore him. Get down to his level and tell him "I cannot listen to you when you scream, find your inside voice and I will listen to what you have to say." Then TURN YOUR BACK on him. It's tedious and frustrating, but he'll get the point. By putting him in his room, you give him permission to use his outside voice anyway.

Good Luck!

Answer 7

My 2.5 year old daughter does the same thing. Its for attention in my opinion. I think what you are doing is find and will eventually work since he is doing it for your attention. When my daughter screams we give her one warning, then put her in her room and tell her she can come out when she's ready to stop screaming. Works like a charm. The key is to be consistent with it though. If you are going to punish for screaming, do it every time so he understands why he is in trouble.
Good luck, its a hard stage!

Answer 8

I read 2 of the responses....what are these people on?!!

Punish a 2.5 yr old?! For screaming?! Months ago..you wondered if he'd ever speak..and now that he's VOICING himself...you want to punish him for it... "be respectful of mommy " he's 2.5 freakin years old...GEEZ!!

My 2.5 yr old is the EXACT same way!!! Are you sure we don't share the SAME son?!! He also STOMPS FROM ROOM TO ROOM!!! LOUDLY!!! I know that ignoring it doesn't work... I just have learned to walk away..YEP!! I remove MYSELF!! If he does it while I'm talking to my husband..I simply wait until he's done ranting..which when you don't even look at him...it takes about 3 seconds to end...he runs to the other room and I can continue my conversation with who ever! I know you want to pull your hair out...TRUST me...I think I've got a bald spot on the left side of my head!!! He can be sooo sweet!!! He has older brothers (2 of them) and an older sister~ he's fighting for attention and if screaming is how he THINKS he's getting it..all the punishing in the world...is just going to keep him in time out! (which don't work!) (I still use the good old palm of my hand...Hurts my hand more than the meaty part of his little rump!!!) (ALL OF YOU WITH A PROBLEM WITH THAT...keep it to yourself!!)
He's doing it for attention and...I know sweetie that you wonder to yourself...will they ever find the body?!! LOL BUt he will out grow this...I have a 14 yr old who did the same thing...and he's still alive and is now the quietest child I have!!! Email me and we can swap war stories about our 2.5 yr olds...LOL [e-mail]

Answer 9

Yea, that's rough. I send my son to his room, take away toys, we won't go places if his is acting badly, and if he deserves it he gets a spank on his butt. I know what you mean though...it seems like no matter what you do or how you threaten them they still act out. My son is four and this type of behavior just started about six months ago. Although he doesn't so much as scream as talk back and get nasty. I'm starting to lose my mind because no matter how he is punished he still does it. It doesnt seem to make much of a difference.

Answer 10

It sounds like you've tried sticks (punishment), but try combining it with a reward, too. It works wonders with my just-turned-three son. His reward is Chuck E. Cheese, even though I don't like the place, and it works with all sorts of things ... being loud, staying in his own bed ... yelling.

I usually have to make a little chart for 5-7 days with each day having its own box. I usually explain the chart to him a dozen times, but I tell him that if each day he does good at this one thing, such as using an inside voice and good manners (not yelling), then he gets to mark off the day. Once he has gone for 5 to 7 days CONSECUTIVE, he gets a trip to Chuck E. Cheese IF he promises to keep being good about not yelling or whatever.

It's worked like a charm for us. He potty trained in a week (only two accidents, I think). I've told a couple of friends and everyone has been delighted with using Chuck E. Cheese as a reward. I didn't even know my son knew about it when we started.

If you don't have a Chuck E. Chesse near you, look for something else equally special and exciting and hopefully it will work. Good luck. It sounds like you definitely have your hands full.