I had mine at about 21. I never, have and still don’t want children. I certainly didn’t ever want any surprises.
Almost from the word, “Hello”, I would state that I don’t want children, and I had a vasectomy. Many women would have nothing to do with me as a result.
Would you just keep quiet about it? I always used condoms anyway, so would it matter?
I know that sounds kind of cruel, but we live in a hostile world. Most of my friends are deep in debt to child support. Women whom lie about talking the pill where very common when I was younger. Most of my male friends tell me, “If I could go back in time, I would have used condoms, or had a vasectomy, or both”.
They called me stupid back then. Today, they phrase me on my foresight. I am 40.
2006-11-11 01:33:03 · 9 answers · asked by Marvin 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What Curtis_A and pitmanett said has been consistent with what I have experienced, with women, when I told them up front that I had a vasectomy.
2006-11-11 04:44:34 · update #1
What Curtis_A and pitmanett said has been consistent with what I have experienced, with women, when I didn't tell them up front that I had a vasectomy.
2006-11-11 04:45:13 · update #2
Hello,
I have a friend that was going through the same thing you are now. He found out with most women, when they did find out, they would just blow him off.
So he stopped saying anything about it, and a few of the woman he was with, didn't want him to wear any protection at all, they said I'm fine, i have birth control, and would hold him in, when he finished..
Well after that happened for a couple of months, this one woman said, do you want to have kids, he said no, and that is why I got a vasectomy at a early age... Well, she got so pissed, ahe stromed out of the house and won't have anything more to do with him...
Come to find out, one of her G/F's said, she was't on anything, and she was trying to get pregant by him. So there you go. but not all women are like that.
Men, lets put the shoe on the other foot, we start a relationship with a woman, we really like her, and things are coming along really well. Should we find a casual way of talking about children,Yes,,,,, Bring it up some how without being to bold, and give her a change to talk about herself.
A womam that had her tubes tied or just couldn't have children, this might give her the change to talk about things. Would it be fair for her not to tell us???? yessssssss
Because we may want children some day. This isn't something that is going to be talked about on the first date, but the 2 or 3 date it might come up. Hey, ya got to know sooner in honesty, rather than later in decent!!!!!!!
2006-11-11 02:53:31 · answer #1 · answered by caasos 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A serious step like vasectomy and the choice of having children is your decision so I'm not going to say anything to it. Don't say it as the first thing straight after hello. Women tend to breach important subjects on second or third date so once the talk about children comes up say it straight forward to her. Tell her that this is your opinion on this subject and it isn't going to change. Don't lead them on that would be unfair.
2006-11-11 01:40:37 · answer #2 · answered by selene 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why might want to you save something like that as a secret from someone you're courting in case you do not have a issue telling people on Y/A? because you by no potential extremely had a reason to save it a secret contained in the first position, you do not favor to rigidity about it now.
2016-11-29 00:52:24 · answer #3 · answered by schiavone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not a man, but I have a story. Many years ago my brother in law was dating this woman. She was bitchy to everyone whenever he wasn't around, but sickening sweet when he was. He had kids from his first marriage and she volunteered to watch them when he had to work. She was vicious to them, and they called me for help. I came over and let myself in just in time to catch her *****-slapping my nephew. I got the kids out, then we had some words. She told me that their father would believe her, and not me. She said, I'm going to get pregnant and he'll marry me, so you better get used to me. I started to laugh, he had a vasectomy about 10 years ago! She went nuts and started screaming. She called him at work and told him she was pregnant-she was sure I was lying. He said, it isn't mine-I had a vasectomy! I haven't seen her since! I would wait. If a woman tells you she's had an abortion, then you can tell her!
2006-11-11 01:47:32 · answer #4 · answered by pitmanette 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let us leave aside you claim that you did the best thing that you had vascetomy. The world population may silently thank you for not adding to its alrealdy heavy burden. However, you are quire right in revealing your girl where you stand . It may be hat one day you may come across a girl who may be sharing your views. Then there would be no problem. But keeping away the fact may lead to complications later on.
2006-11-11 01:45:39 · answer #5 · answered by Prabhakar G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its gd that yr being honest .. i praise u for that .. probably the one that u dated before intends to settle down. have family and kids etc in the long run ...on the other hand its also a gd thing not to tell so that incase yr partner turns up pregnant .. chances are the kid's is not yrs and yr partner is having an affair..
anyway gd luck in finding yr lady love..
2006-11-11 01:41:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes its the right thing to do..
2006-11-11 01:39:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say nothing until it looked like sex would enter into it.
Then, disclosure
2006-11-11 01:37:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her when you really get to know her.
2006-11-11 01:39:53 · answer #9 · answered by Christian c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋