Just keep trying? Would you give up?

Question

I try to be supportive and encouraging. Most of my compliments are met with resistance, like she doesn't believe them and hence, thinks I am lying. Moreover, she has said before that she doesn't deserve to be in a relationship. She is such a great woman and great person. I want her to see that. Is there anything I can do to convince her? She knows she has issues with this stuff, so how can we start to get past it?

Answer 1

keep loving her the way you do,but sounds like you must have alot of patience...it sounds like you haven't reached that fed up limit.... she's lucky to have you, but sounds like there's alot of insecurity on her part. Good luck to you both...

Answer 2

Obviously she has been damaged in her self esteem either by her family and/or past relationships. Show her besides saying it how much she means to you in the little things you do and keep saying it. If you do love her don't give up. Say how you will never stop believing in her and how she makes you feel is true and real and why you are with her and want her in your life.

I have a similar experience with my man as he has a family who (still) treats him like he is insignificant and a loser. He still wonders why I am here and sometimes says he would understand if I wanted to leave and find someone better. I just tell him how much he is my partner, my other half and that I will always support and believe in him. I tell him to stop saying those things because it hurts me and how does he think it makes me feel? Why would I be with a loser? Why would I stay with someone not great and wonderful?

It is frustrating sometimes but just keep moving forward together as time passes she will see that you are for real and hopefully that she is worthy of a great relationship with you in her life.

Answer 3

I have a lingerng feeling you are keeping something away when asking this question. Please if you have come up for buttermilk why hide the utensils behind you. Since you say that she is a great women this 'stuff' unspecified by you must really be hurting her so much that she had forgotten her reasonable and taken his extreme step.If I w ere you I will not give up when I know (as you do) that why I am leaving is a good thing. If this 'stuff' relates to you admit your lapse and crave forgiveness.Between the two of you , you should not stand on formalities.Try to save the marriage.

Answer 4

You cannot make this type of woman see anything if she doesn't want to. I say give up I wasted five years trying to convince this one girl that I loved her and she should love herself, and no matter what I did for her she would keep going down the same self destructive paths and breaking my heart while she was. Best to walk away with everything you got left in ya.
-NmD!

Answer 5

hi, she obviously has low self esteem and it sounds like in the past she has been treated like crap as she can't get used to you being so nice to her, if you can't make her understand how worth while she is then perhaps she should go to her GP and try for counseling this may help her by talking over the issues she has with herself good luck all you can do is love her and hope she can see she is worthy of your love, i hope it all works out well.

Answer 6

i think perhaps you should give her some space alone to work out what it is she really wants as she seems very confused also her talking to someone other than you a friend, relative may help her realise what she wants, good luck.

Answer 7

I once had the same problem with someone and i wish i had answers to that

Answer 8

I really appeciate you doing that....just do something very special for her...like take her for a very romantic date...& tell her "if you would not have been special i would not have done this for u...so u really r special..."....even i feel wat she feels at times...so i think this will work out..