everytime we fight he used violence towards me.he dont even care whether im pregnant or not.i wanted to leave him so many time but he refuse to let me go.what am i supposed to do?
2006-11-10 22:22:12 · 12 answers · asked by cutie pie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Please leave him right now, what are you going to do when you have your child, he will be violent towards the baby too. If you care at all about the baby and your self you will go and far away, you don't even want your child to see a father like this. Your situation sounds terrible, but it will never stop unless you do something. Just ask yourself two things, do you love him more than your baby? and is love supposed to be like this? and you will know what to do
I hope you are alright, find someone you trust to help you move out, and don't tell him where you will be living in the future, people love you and will help,
one day in the future you will have beautiful baby, and will be surrounded by people who love you truly, as people who hit you don't love you at all
best of luck :)
2006-11-10 22:37:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, you can't be afraid to make it on your own! There are many women who probably weren't as capable or as brave as you but somehow they are living a better life simply because they took ACTION. So, be strong and have courage first of all. Just do it. GET OUT TODAY IF YOU CAN.
There may be some women's groups or even a shelter for battered women in your area. Be determined to find some help. If you're afraid of calling the police and having a restraining order put on him (sometimes it doesn't mean a thing to psychos or mean people) then you have to find a way to save and hide some money.
Get a paypal account or something. Or, any kind of an account that doesn't send records to your home. Build that cash up until you have enough to leave and be secure for a while. In the meantime, try to find a better job or go back to school or something. Tell him that you're doing it for the both of you just in case he tries to accuse you of cheating or something.
You have to be tactful and smart about this. You have to pretend. You may even have to be a little deceitful. But be nice, supportive, and do whatever you can to "show you care". Fake it. Get a good friend or your parents to help you out in this if you need to. But don't put your full trust in anyone just yet. You may not be ready. Try to depend mostly on yourself.
Get a P.O. box if that will allow you hide your "important mail". Or, some other kind of mailbox.
If you're going to church, try to inspire him by asking his opinions. Try to make him feel important. Do whatever you can to stay on his good side until you can make your escape.
I don't recommend violence because sometimes the laws will not work out in your favor. And besides that, you could get hurt even worse - or wind up in a worse off situation.
But try to focus on being stronger, tactful, and getting out. If you can find a good friend or relative (that he doesn't know about), tell them what you're going through and see if they will help you or let you stay with them for a while. The further away, the better!
2006-11-10 22:50:30 · answer #2 · answered by mo2dajizzo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I feel that you should leave him and not stay with him bcoz you are pregnant. No doubt your child needs a father but remember this "Two wrong doesn't make one right". can you imagine what is the impact on your child development when he sees his father always use violence on his mother. It is never a healthy sight for a child and it affect the child development.
You must firm when you made up your mind on whether to leave him and not regret it later. If there is a need you can apply for PPO from the court against him. All the best to you
2006-11-10 22:56:17 · answer #3 · answered by Clown & Joker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pregnancy isn't a reason to stay. Your child is going to be around that violence too if you stay. Protect yourself and your child and leave, be somewhere safe. Love doesn't give someone the reason to be violent. Perhaps he should seek help about anger management. Just don't let your child be a part of it. Once that baby is born, it will be the only thing that matters to you, and if he figures that out he will use it against you. Please be safe and good luck.
2006-11-10 22:35:28 · answer #4 · answered by KC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think violence on women, especially pregant ones are unacceptable. Its hard to give advice on this but the best one I can give is that you start thinking about your baby. He's attacking you, he might attack your baby as well. You might even lose your baby. As a mother you don't want to take that chance. Ask for help from YOUR relatives or the police or a guidance counsellor, there are organizations out there made for these things.
If you want to leave him, they could help you out. Take care.
2006-11-10 22:34:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Usually I will advise you to stay and work things out but this one is too much..hitting a pregnant lady is an act of cowardice.
Please I know you love him but if you wanna remain married to this guy cos you love him too much try avoid any confrontation with him..when he is in fire you shall water it.
Do not say things or do things to agitate him, find a good time to talk to him on whatever things you wanna say especially things when you think will trigger his temper.
Patient and sacrifice is important in this kinda relationship.
But if you think he is too violent I think you should leave him.
2006-11-10 22:35:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first question for you is WHY are you in love with someone that is abusive towards you? For your safety you need to get out because it will get worse. But if you stay with him it is no one's fault but your own. Its your choice of putting up with the abuse or leaving and going out and finding someone that will treat you like a woman is supposed to be treated and would respect you.
2006-11-10 23:11:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pack your bags, call the police and get out now.If he ever has to watch the child and that baby cries the chances are he will get violent with the baby. For your sake and the future of your baby GET OUT NOW!!!!
2006-11-11 01:29:32 · answer #8 · answered by bob j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
either make a police report or
learn up Jeet Kun Do and fight him back.
2006-11-10 22:58:15 · answer #9 · answered by Peter I 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE
or
Get a baseball bat and put it beside the bed when he asks why tell him he has to go to sleep sometime.
.
2006-11-10 22:30:52 · answer #10 · answered by kevin_4508 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋