Is my husband a pedophile?

Question

I am a young mother 24 and I am seriously thinking of leaving my husband who is 14 years older than I am. I am having a strong feeling in my gut that he might molest my son. My son is only 10 months old but my husband is very strict with him babies at this age love to touch things but my husband get's so angry that he swats his hands constantly. He has alot of anger issues because his father was physically violent towards him and his mother and two sisters. He doesn't play with my son or interact with him. He is constantly playing video games or watching television. He lashes out at gay's on television on anything that comes up about gay's (we are both christian). My real suspicion is that my husband loves to touch my butt constantly, he never plays with my son but always sit's him on his lap if only to watch television. When I accused him of being overly affectionate he lashed out and starting cursing and calling me vulgar names. I am deathly afraid of leaving my son with him.

I have never left my son alone with him ever! He knows what I think of him but doesn't say anything. When he does change my sons diaper he is rough. When my husband was younger he admitted to me that a young boy tried to come on to him but he kicked him off of him. He also said that he has had anal sex with a girlfriend I know most of you are laughing because you think it's silly. But my gut is telling me to never leave my son alone with him. If I do decide to leave him I know that he is going to file for joint custody I don't want my son alone with him. What should I do? Should I stay with him and leave when I have enough evidence. I don't want my son to be molested in order for me to get full custody. I have been praying for a way out but I can't risk my child at the hands of him.

Answer 1

i think that you and your husband really need some counseling. and he also sounds like a homophobe. Me and my entire family are christians, and i have been raised in a christian house hold, but gays are people too. But you and him, ya'll need to go into some couples therepy and ya'll need seperate shrinks. I'm not laughing, cuz you need help.


O, and if you're gonna pray, there is no need for worry, God will work it all out. You are worrying too much. Just pray, a real, heart-felt prayer, and pray over your son, and your household, and pray for your husband. Don't keep praying and worrying, and being scared, for God said that he would never leave us or forsake us, and he also has not given us a spirit of fear. Remember, worry cancels out prayer. as soon as you stop worrying and just pray, things will iron themselves out. God Bless

Answer 2

I would like to request that before disregarding this response as the opinion of a sick person, you read it in its entirety with an open mind; I happened upon your question as a childlove activist. I am a girllover who fully supports adult-child relationships with consent. With that in mind, I would like to point out that as with adult relationships, there can be healthy relationships and there can be abusive ones. Whether or not your husband is a boylover, it is clear that he will be abusive. The question at hand is not whether your husband is a pedophile, it is whether he has a strong likelihood to become an abusive father. Based on what you have told us, I feel the answer to the latter question is far more workable than the former. In that sense, my initial reaction is still similar to others that have responded: that you need to get out as quickly as possible. Upon rereading your question, however, I took strong notice of your fear of joint custody. I agree that if you are going to leave your husband, it is essential that you have full custody of your son. Your safest option, I fear, is to wait until there is more evidence; enough that you can rest assured that you will have full custody. If I were in your situation, I would definitely want some form of hard evidence. This means video or audio, a spy camera or bugs, while this may seem extreme, it is the only way that you can rest assured that you will have full custody. You only get one shot, and you want to make sure it doesn't go the wrong way. Lastly, while I support adult-child relationships, they are still illegal, so use the law in your favor! As a childlover myself, I know that if you can prove that he is a boylover, and has acted on it, he will never get to see your son again. Good luck! And may the LORD be with you,

loveactivist792

Answer 3

Get yourself and your son out of there and into a safe situation for living and get help from counsellors involving your husband on your level.......to swat a 10 month child is very wrong and doing it in anger can be very dangerous especially if you arent sure if he is going to really lose it and cause your son some real damage.....it can happen in a second you maybe just haning the washing or taking a shower. By the sounds of it he had a hard time as a kid but would probaly see it as normal behaviour because he knows no different but he needs to learn how to be a parent so you can have great paent relationships with your child ..when you speak witha counsellor to start do it on your own and express any sexual concerns....good luck

Answer 4

Even if your husband is not a pedophile all other behavior you have described are reasons to leave him. Usually if you have a gut feeling about something like molestation, you are probably right. Get out now, hon. Even if your baby has not been molested yet, don't let it get to that. He will be affected by your decision for the rest of his life.

Answer 5

It sounds like he has more anger and homophobic issues than being a pedophile in my opinion. Although I'm not against swatting a child's had to teach them they can't touch everything they see, it doesn't have to be too hard for them to get the point. Don't stick around waiting to see if he will do something to your child. Make your move as soon as you can and get out of there, for both of your sakes. Being Christian does not make you perfect and accepting of all people, and that's obvious in this case. He has issues he needs to work out and you do not have to sacrifice your son for him to work through then either.

Prayers, peace and blessings to you and your son, sweetie!

Answer 6

I don't think he is a pedophile so much as an abuser. I mean he swat's his 10 month old's hands...He grew up in a bad home. The lashing out at gays in a macho thing and I think he is a bully and you should seriously think about leaving him because it is only go to get more rough as your son gets older.. Seriously..

Answer 7

Although nothing you have written is any indication to me that your husband is a pedophile, he does sound abusive and I believe you should trust your gut. Take your child out of harms way before anything tragic happens,

Answer 8

Is my husband a pedophile?

Answer 9

based on your description it doesn't appear he's a pedophile, but men in this day and age can be really pervy so you should keep an eye on the situation and try not to leave your son alone with your husband,

Answer 10

trust your gut instinct, he sounds like he has some issues, so whether or not he is a pedophile I would get myself and my child out of there. If anything did ever happen you would feel terrible because you had the gut instinct but did nothing about it.