how do you get a one year old to stop hitting without spanking? thanks?

Question

too young for "time out" of course.

Answer 1

You are right a one year old is too young for time out and spanking is never a good answer.

When your child hits, don't get mad or say no (no negative attention), but show with you face that you are not happy. Take his hand and calmly say "nice" or "gentle". Put his hand on what he was hitting and stroke it gently and repeat, nice. Then take your hand and stroke him gently and repeat the word "nice". Do this every time. When he does it be very encouraging and smile.

If you can try and grab the hit before he hits and repeat the above process

After doing this for a while, when he starts to get it and if he hits again you can say no hitting and then repeat the process. You don't want to say no at first because you want him to focus on the right thing to do and not just that you are saying no.

I did this with my son and it worked great

Answer 2

Well, s/he might be too young to understand what "time out" means and so won't stay in the time out spot, but a time out could still work if structured correctly.

Set up a playpen in a quiet corner with no toys or other fun stuff to do. The next time s/he hits, it's time out time. Pick the child up, take her/him to the playpen, and leave her/him there for a few minutes with absolutely no attention from anyone. Also make sure you don't make eye contact, and when you tell the child why s/he is going to time out use a flat, stern voice. The reason for the lack of attention, eye contact, and inflection is to make sure s/he isn't hitting partly because it brings attention. Just be as consistent as you can about it and s/he will stop hitting.

Answer 3

Catt has the right idea, you have to teach him the difference between hitting and being nice.

The one thing I wanted to add is that children want nothing more than their parents attention. If your child hits another child and makes them cry nothing works better than telling your child "No, we don't hit", then picking up the crying child to comfort it.

Talk to the child you're holding, things like "Oh, poor baby, did (child's name) hurt you? That wasn't very nice" Your child will come to share the attention, you have to make him wait a minute for your attention because you are dealing with the pain that he caused. Only make your child wait long enough for him to start to feel badly, then draw him close to you and point out, in words, that he made the other child cry by hitting.

Help your child to comfort the child that he hurt. By doing this, your child is getting the idea that you will give comfort to a child that he hurt, but NOT to him. Children are self centered and learning empathy is a hard lesson, you have to help him learn.

Good Luck!

Answer 4

sit him down and have a talk.he isnt too young to understand that you mean business is he? of course spare the rod spoil the child.ive had my fair share of punishments.switches slaps and belt welts across my butt and back.however i was 8 or 9.that would be abusement wouldnt it?well back when i was growing up that really got my attention faster than getting a lecture.it also made me realize i had messed up and i would not do that again.or at least try not to do it again

Answer 5

He really isn't too young for a time out, the time needs to be much shorter than with younger children.
When he does these behaviors, tell him No, and IMMEDIATELY put him in his crib for two minutes.
He'll learn quickly.
(I never understood the spanking thing, hit someone, so they will learn not to hit?)
Good Luck!

Answer 6

some people think it is cute,and laugh that is one problem, at one year old the child doesn't really know what is right or wrong.my suggestion is everytime it happens say no, get her hands and show how to do it nice and how much you appreciate with a big smile .she will get the point.

Answer 7

wait you're saying there is a better alternative to teaching a child to not use physical violence than using physical violence against the child?

that makes no. sense. at all. I'd say basically the only logical thing to do is put the child in a kennel and continue reading parenting advice from complete and anonomous strangers.

Answer 8

No he is not too young for a time out, put him on the couch for 1 min. (his age) and sit away from him & put him back when he gets up.

Answer 9

slam his/her fingers in a car door. Just kidding, that's a tough one you may have to give him/her a little tap and tell them that this is why you don't hit, it's because it hurts.

Answer 10

well if the one year old is hitting another child, I say let that other child smack the one year old, let him see how it feels when he hits someone!