Why can't I just have a guy FRIEND and nothing more??

Question

It always seems that as soon as i meet a guy, and we get to know each other AS FRIENDS, he would end up liking me, all i want is to have a guy friend, and have him be nothing more then that- advice at all?

Answer 1

Maybe you're just too good looking and irresistible. Try farting around them, a lot.

Answer 2

First of all if this is really what you want then you will have to let the guy know up front. He may think you are not sincere about this type of relationship. Also, what is the rush a friend is a friend and until you meet a guy that takes you seriously just deal with the friends you have. "This may be some of the reason why they might not believe you, is that you sound like you have to have a male friend right now.

Answer 3

American Men are not mature enough to handle a Guy Girl relationship as friends...It always seems they want more and just cant be friends..It is the sexual attraction that they cant supress or maybe they are just downright horny for you...Maybe you should take a look at how you act around them?..Skimpy clothes touching?..over affection?..You never know...But definately you are in the wrong country for "Just Friends"
All I can say is Make it clear from the start and keep making it clear...as long as you do this the other person should get the hint and stay "Just Friends"
The other alternative is to hang out with Homosexual men...I hear they make great male partners and I am sure they wont want to hop in bed with you that quickly.
Check yourself and Good Luck

Answer 4

You may not like my answer, but the truth is that men and women are just not meant to be friends. There is an instinct in us that is there for a reason, and it is called procreation. If you can TRULY be friends with a guy, maybe you should consider being more, because there are a lot of very unhappily married people out there that wish they could be friends with their spouse, but just cannot because lust brought them together. And being more than friends does not mean you have to have physical relations with a guy. Women have become slaves to physical love and men are happy for it. You need to demand respect from a guy, and if he is your friend, willing to wait for 'hot and heavy love', and spends time with you, like your friends do, enjoying things you enjoy, then why not? If he just wants to get it on, then ditch him, because you can't have a friendship with someone that only sees you for what you have to offer in that department.

I say all this with the assumption that you are currently single:)

The bottom line is, maybe you are a good catch, and that is why guys want to become closer to you when they get to know you. But if it is just for hopping in the sack, then you are wise to back off, that is not a good way to lay a foundation for a relationship.

Answer 5

If your friend starts putting the moves on you, simply tell him that you like him very much AS A FRIEND and you don't want anything to spoil that relationship. It's really great when you have guy friends as well as girl friends. But when you're young, it's sometimes difficult to convince them that you're not interested in crossing the line into a romantic relationship. One way to help keep him as a friend only is to look for activities that you can do with others, so you don't wind up as a 'twosome' all by yourselves. At least, not until you have firmly established your friendship at the level that makes you comfortable.

Answer 6

Well, an unattached female that is developing a closeness fwith a member of the opposite sex can transform a friendship to a love. Friendship is a much better basis for a lifetime committment than pure lust...and perhaps both are involved.

TO many guys, your signals may be confusing. In fact, it may be construed as being a PT to the guys...even if your motives are pure. If a guy walks away after asking you out, he wouldn't be much of a friend anyway

In a way, your complaint is odd...it sounds like you are collecting something...like needing one close girlfriend, one close guy friend, a classic skirt, a pair of boots, etc.

Answer 7

Why are you a lez? We men are all into women considering that they're not homos, even homos would screw women. So the point is that we are all walking sex machines. So unless you meet a guy with no sex drive what so ever, then you'll have him as a friend only but otherwise they're all thinking about screwing you sexually. Go rent the movie "When Harry Met Sally" even though it's just a movie but it states the facts. You can still have male friends as long as you don't cross that line by not putting yourself in that position you can become intimate.

Answer 8

you must, MUST state your interests in the first 5 minutes of making a new male friend. you know what happens when you don't assert yourself right away? BINGO! the new 'friend' sees 1) here's a cool girl 2) here's a cute girl, and the most important, 3) here's a cool, cute girl PAYING ATTENTION TO ME! i don't care what age you are, it'll always happen. so, you MUST get that out of the way in the beginning. if they go, they go. if they stay, they stay knowing how it's going to be. and if they fall for you, it's their deal. JUST REMEMBER: even if you've told a guy you only want to be friends, and you start getting all touchy-feely with him like you do your girl friends, just understand that that's a HARD thing for guys to deal with sometimes... especially if they're not seeing anyone. just try to remember how they might read into some things. and once they look like they're going to stick around, you'll know them better and have built trust and understanding.

Answer 9

Speaking as a man, it's hard to be in a relationship with a woman for whom I have romantic feelings if she wants to keep the relationship as a friendship. It's particularly difficult if she knows how I feel about her. My experience has been that one of two things happen. Either it becomes so uncomfortable (particularly for the woman since she doesn't reciprocate those feelings for the man) that the relationship abruptly ends (meaning there is no actual goodbye, rather communication just stops)....or.....they are able to talk through what's going on and be mature about it. That has happened in a few circumstances for me. Even though I have had romatic feelings for her and she hasn't had them with me, we have been able to talk about it, talk about the friendship, talk about what we want to do together and where the boundaries are for inappropriate behavior. I have discovered that those honest conversations are very important and helpful and conducive to growth. However, most of the time, they don't happen because it's easier to avoid those awkward situations than it is to address them. If you want this guy to be a friend, see if he is willing to talk through what he's feeling, what you're feeling, and establish some boundaries to the friendship that you do want to have. (Remind him that it's a friendship you DO want, because he will be a little heartbroken and will need some encouragement from you.)

Answer 10

You do ask a "tricky" question.
With the GENDER-issue being at hand, I hope you do understand how THE BIGGER PLAN plays in all this insanity.
Ever since *the beginning of time* it was intended for the two genders to meet, gain a more intense connection and then develop such a commitment for each other to build [a cohesive unit] %FAMILY.
I'm sure that as you age, you will understand this issue more as a HEART-feeling (which is such a driving force.)
If you LEARN about this now (I have no idea of your age) you can successfully apply it's values to your life.

Answer 11

It's a natural progression. Platonic friendships are rather rare. If you truly only want friendship why must it be with a guy? What is it you want from a friendship that only a guy can provide? The answers to those questions contain the answer to yours. The guys are getting those signals from you.