What should I do?Am confused...serious answers only pls…read all?

Question

I told my close female friend how I felt about her, she said we'd never be together-not what I wanted to hear.We have a very close+intense friendship,spend a lot of time with each other,constant touch,trust,care bout etc She can't imagine me not being in her life/a part of it.
I'm finding this hard to accept as i believed we would get together 1 day. I've not spoken to her for 5 days now(feeling guilty,as she has txt asking why I've gone quiet)I'm not sure what to do?

I seem to be questioning the friendship as the reasons for us not going further was that:we are complete opposites,different views on sex\relationships,I keep winding her up,we give each other headaches,it wouldn't work out,wouldn't feel right for her,its just me-meaning?

Why are we friends then?How cud we have got so close and not go further?

Solutions, ideas?What should I do?

We did contemplate sleeping together(1 night stand)but she said it wouldn't feel right,it'll be wrong-so we r atrracted to each other

1)She still gets jealous when I mention other girls I’m interested in.WHY?
2)She believes I'm dating someone but she did NOT ask me about her at any point--seeing that we're friends.WHY NOT?

1 night stand was talked about us BOTH, not just my idea!

Answer 1

its something inside her which is holding back this relationship and unfortunately there could be many reasons for this. ask yourself does she go out with other guys the answer is probably no. it is possible that there is something in her past or that she is looking for the perfect relationship which unfortunately does not exist. i had a similar relationship with guy once with the same suggestion sleeping together which i would not do although i would have taken the stars out of the sky for him i loved him dearly. i had a real problem with the fact that other women literally chased after him constantly and this always held me back from taking anything further. it is a sad fact that few people end up with the one they really love and settle for something less. women normally settle for security and in my case this was one thing i never felt with him.

Answer 2

Just because you are close friends and share so many intimate details with each other, does not entitle you to additional benefits, sexual or otherwise. Your feelings, while completely understandable, are just that, feelings. You are feeling a little raw and vulnerable because you exposed yourself emotionally to this girl and she rejected the idea of taking it further. She is still wanting your friendship, because she is texting you and wondering what happened to you while you are sitting there pouting. I also see a little sadism on her part, she acts jealous of other girlfriends? Why? Sure, why? I wonder that, too. Maybe it isn't jealousy? Maybe you are ascribing something that isn't real? Or maybe she doesn't want you to be happy with anyone else while she determines how long she can play with your heart? Who knows. Its seems to be a lot of drama for two people who who claim such a close relationship. My suggestion, is to sit down with her and ask the hard questions, or find another friend who doesn't play with your heart, to bare your soul to and would be interested in more than just friendship. I'd say ask the hard questions and be prepared to move onto someone else who can be what you want and won't jerk you around! Good luck to you!

Answer 3

Ooh a tough one, but I've been there more or less. Maybe she just wants you to fall back on when things go wrong for her, ya know if she has a bad relationship she can always come for you for comfort and affection. BUT if she is getting jealous over you and another girl you should ask her why! Talk to her again, you don't want to lose her as a friend, or is it one of those "if i can't get anymore I'm not interested" ones? I think your contrasting views on relationship mean you probably aren't meant for each other, but it's always good to have some female friends for tips and advice!

Good luck what ever you decide to do!

Answer 4

you both obviously care about each other a great deal, she probably feels a bit scared at the moment that if anything did happen between you and it didnt work out that she would lose everything you had before because relationships always seem to change things no matter how good a friend you were before, you should try and keep in touch with her because she will need reassurance that you dont not care about her now and you werent just friends with her so you could be with her, you have a closer relationship with her than any partner she could ever have she is probably scared of losing that , hope this helps x

Answer 5

I have a very good best friend of the opposite sex, and although he would love for us to get together, I just don't want to go down that road. If anything ever happened in the relationship I fear that it would hurt our friendship. We have been friends for many years and I would never want to risk it. We are also 2 very different people. That's fine in a friendship, but doesn't give credance to a worthy romantic relationship. He has listened to me about by romantic guy friends for years and has just recently told me of a woman that he is dating. I wouldn't call either of us jealous. That is an immature trait, especially between friends. Good luck!

Answer 6

You are not confused at all, what you wanted you now know is not what she wants, now because there is no hope that she will play with your willy for you, the idea that you were friends has now dissolved. The reality of the situation is a little crushing and you are upset and angry. You also see girls, pretty girls as something to put on the end of your willy, not really as friends at all. Get over it if the shoe was on the other foot she would be throwing tantrums.

Answer 7

from what you just said it seems like she is scared cause if you get together as boyfriend and girlfriend then it doesn't work out then she has lost a true friend so just go with the flow and she will come around cause she acting jealous when you talk about other girls so there is some feeling there a little stronger than it should be so just wait good luck

Answer 8

Look at you. You're a mess (emotionally). Give this one a breather. Step back. Both of you. Be kind to one another. For certain, if the two of you are to entertain closeness, intimacy and affection, romance and maybe even something long lasting, it surely will assert itself in no uncertain terms you will both understand. Please remember this: if the chemistry is there between the two of you nothing can take it away, ever. If the chemistry is not there, nothing can be created nor manufactured by either of you to make it happen.

Answer 9

I think she's known for a while that you like her and she is flattered but still not interested. She likes having the male attention but she doesn't intend to do anything about it. She considered the one night stand because she enjoys your attention, not because she wants a sexual relationship.

I think she would be quite happy to go back to being just friends and knowing your fancy her. If you're not confortable with that then let her go. And just because you're male and female doesn't mean that anything would ever have happened.

She will never get together with you though, you'll have to accept that.

Answer 10

This is not the girl for you if you want a lasting relationship. If you want to be with someone for a lifetime you must be on the same page--same views etc. If you want to fool around then it doesn't matter.

Sounds like a physical attraction, and there is nothing wrong with that, but you'd probably be better off with someone else.