A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
2006-11-10 08:55:01 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
A man is sitting in his living room reading, when he hears his wife shouting in their bedroom. As he runs in, he sees a man diving out their window.
"What happened?", he shouts!
"That man assaulted me!" she cried.
"Why didn't you shout sooner?"
"Well, it was dark, and when he started, I thought it was you,."
"How did you know it wasn't?"
"Well......after he lasted longer than 30 seconds...."
2006-11-10 09:03:06 · answer #1 · answered by Hatir Ba Loon 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Best joke I've heard in weeks! Excellent punchline!
2006-11-10 09:05:26 · answer #2 · answered by Beck 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Husband shows his wife that he really loves her by getting himself banged by the Criiminal with guns !!!! Ha Ha Ha ...a great one !!! I liked it !
2006-11-10 09:00:06 · answer #3 · answered by Tickler 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
F*cken hilarious Loved It!!!
2006-11-10 09:05:57 · answer #4 · answered by straykat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heard it...unfortunately my version had a Christian message attached. It was a whole lot more traumatic.
2006-11-10 08:59:00 · answer #5 · answered by Hacksaw 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heard it before.
2006-11-10 09:00:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO LMAO LMAO LMAO!!!!.... *takes a deep breath* Oh lord... *chuckles* thats funny...
2006-11-10 08:58:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
lolololol
2006-11-10 09:32:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha haha! ^_^ That one was good! ^_^
2006-11-10 08:58:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
lmf'nao omg that was freggin hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the best one ive heard\read all day!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-11-10 09:21:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋