i just feel like i do nothing but get onto them for the smallest things. i mean, they are 1 and 3. i know they are going to get into things and get in trouble. why do the little things they do bother me or work my nerves so bad?? they don't ever seem to listen to me, and i just always feel like i bring their spirits down. what should i do?
2006-11-10 07:25:28 · 13 answers · asked by trisha_r_c 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
no im sure your kids would be lost without you ..sounds like you just need a break go out by yourself and get some time alone!!
2006-11-10 07:28:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, NO your children would not be better off without you. Nobody can take your place as a mother, even when you are feeling incompetetant.
Its hard to have two little ones at once and the stress of them not obeying (which is normal) is probably making you more irritable. If you don't have someone who can relieve you every once in awhile, I recommend signing up at a gym that offers daycare. A little exercise relieves stress, plus you have an hour to yourself.
Its important to lower your stress level before you think about discipline issues. Your children will respect you because they know they are being punished for not doing the right thing if they know its not from Mommy's frustration.
Good luck!
2006-11-10 15:35:09 · answer #2 · answered by leahivan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is natural to feel guilty sometimes but you need to consider if you are just down or if you are really bringing their "spirits down." Perhaps you need some time to yourself.-(maybe a few hours every week) Maybe a friend or relative could help watch them when you feel overwhelmed.
However it is most important to remember that the well being of your children should come first. You may think about talking to a doctor about this. He/She would be able to offer some advice and reassure you.
2006-11-10 16:55:47 · answer #3 · answered by artimis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your 3 year old is old enought to start helping you. When you do the housework have him/her help you. When my girl was 3 there was always something she could help me with. Give hh the feeling that you need them. While you two are together talk alot about what your doing something you saw on tv and soon. HH will feel vip around you. the one year old can also be with you two in a secure chair. You can ask your 3 year old to tell you when hh little sister/brother is ready for a nape. When its sleep time for the one year old explain to the 3 year old thats the time for you two to relaxe. You can read a book while your 3 year old plays with something on their own. Its work with me after awhile my daughter start going into her room and would play for 2 hours on her own. OH Happy day. Good luck
2006-11-12 08:45:28 · answer #4 · answered by eidunotno 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so after all that, you want to leave them without a mother?... at least you know that you are wrong unlike some parents, they never even realize it and its the kids that suffers, think of it this way...its so hard for you to control your anger right? and you are like how old? now think about how old your kids are, if you can't control your anger then why do you expect your 1 and 3 year olds to control their behaviors, they are genetically programed to be a hassle around that age and i know its hard. trust me they are NOT better off without you but you really do gotta have more patience or they'll continue this upon their children. you have quite a big responsibility there, good luck ^_^
2006-11-10 15:31:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Awww! They love you very very much and would probably be lost without you around since you've been around from day 1. Kids love to test your patients and see what they can get away with. They for some reason or another love when their mommies or daddies get angry and frusterated and see you crying or looking dumb falled.....Kids will test your limits and seeing as though they are only 2 years apart they can get into trouble and test you together..You just gotta take it with a smile and let them know whats not good and whats okay...Be consistent with your choices and let them know its okay to have fun but when mommy gets angry and upset..nobody wants to be upset!! good luck and trust me it is all normal and part of them growing older.
2006-11-14 15:20:35 · answer #6 · answered by rkonkin226 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
awe that's sad. You need to come up with a calming device. Think of one thing that you can do in the situation and use it to calm yourself everytime so you can think clearly. If you feel yourself starting to get mad count to ten, or get a glass of water, or go scream into a pillow or something. Ya know? Its much easier to fight fires with a clear mind :) good luck!
2006-11-10 15:37:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do fun things with them.Like the park or zoo.You have to be happy to make them happy.You have have the same discipline with them and look up on parenting to see what to do for children there age.Be patient.It does get better.Victoria
2006-11-10 15:33:16 · answer #8 · answered by victoria m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to be a bit more patient with your children. Like you said, they are very young and it's in their nature to get into things and get in trouble. You need to start dealing with things differently. Make learning "right" and "wrong" fun for them, so that they, and you, aren't getting so upset over the "bad" stuff.
Have fun with your kids, because they won't be kids for long.
Goodluck!
2006-11-10 15:31:24 · answer #9 · answered by *Logan's Mommy* 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a father of a 1 and 2 year old, and they drive me bananas sometimes, but you gotta stick with them, they would be lost without you. They will grow out of it........ I hope
2006-11-10 15:34:08 · answer #10 · answered by nystateofmind8989 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋