I'm kinda of a hermit (I have only one close lady friend, and I live by myself in a studio apartment in Boston), but the thing is I have a majority of family members who criticize me for losing touch for long periods of time. (Most of my family is from the south in Alabama and Georgia. Very strong need for family values) I lived most of my youth and young adult years surrounded by family, and I have always wanted more time alone to center and balance my mind and spirit. Now that I finally have it, they want me to continue to keep in touch. I don't mind any of them calling or visiting me, but I told them (nicely) that I refuse to go out of my way to keep in touch with anyone. Too much work and worry. Anyone got any ideas on what else I can say to get my point across? (Keep in mind. Most of my family is very stubborn)
2006-11-10 03:40:59 · 6 answers · asked by Daemon 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I did tell most of them that I was sort of a loner and/or hemit, and I always had this mentality since I was younger, but my words continue to fall on deaf ears.
2006-11-10 03:58:07 · update #1
This is for Sally. No, I don't feel like I'm being mean, and yes, I'm in my right mind. True, in my mind, I don't like the thought of feeling responsible for other family's issues and problems, but that doesn't say I won't be there in a time of need and emergency.
2006-11-10 04:22:33 · update #2
Well, that's just plain sad. For them AND for you. They love you and you obviously don't love anyone back. If you did, you'd want to keep in touch. One day your family members will get sick and die. And you won't care? You have children being born into the family that you will never know.... When you get sick someday, nobody will care or help you or take care of you. You want them to visit you, but you won't go out of your way to visit with them by phone, mail or in person. Very selfish. Sorry, that's how I see it.
If you are mentally ill, you should seek help. If you are just being selfish, you should straighten up and fly right. Life is too short to be so mean to all the people who care about you!
2006-11-10 04:07:22 · answer #1 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Family is extremely important. These are the only people who are going to be unconditionally loving you for the rest of your life. That is great that you found somewhere that gives you peace of mind, but do not forget them. Remember during the hard times, tehy are always going to be the ones there for you (bad or good times). Make sure to call them and check up on them once a week. Just tell them you an afford to visit every weekend. But do not forget...family is LOVE. :)
2006-11-10 03:46:08 · answer #2 · answered by Mimi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well thats a hard one. The thing about family if you really really want them to leave you alone then you need to shut them out pretty much. I have a cousin who compeltely shut everyone in the family out even his own mother but she also does the same to him. Nobody bothers him anymore because he doesnt respond to emails, doesnt answer his phone, and just recently a family member visited him and he didnt even answer the door.
2006-11-10 03:46:54 · answer #3 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So why not agree to contact one of them on a regular basis, say once a month. That way they know you're still alive and well, and you do your familial duty. Not too much to ask is it?
2006-11-10 03:45:16 · answer #4 · answered by F 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why wont you tell them the truth tell them how you really feel about the situation they should understand
2006-11-10 03:50:07 · answer #5 · answered by foxy_sexy_lesbian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just talk when they call you but remember loneliness will happen if you isolate yourself too much...they miss you..theyre different from you...ive knowm many Libras who do well living alone...
reassure them they will see you soon for Thanksgiving
2006-11-10 03:44:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋