My dad commited suicide when I was 12. He was in the hospital for a week, and one day i didnt go see him because i had church. The doctors released him from the hospital, and i cooked dinner that night. I made pizza, but i burned it. The next morning i went to school, and he went to the golf course by our house, and shot himself. I feel like im the one that has put our family through all of this, like it is all my fault.
2006-11-09 22:30:38 · 18 answers · asked by gardner7988 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
It is NOT your fault. Your dad made the decision to do this on his own. You had nothing to do with it. You are a great person. Find an adult you can trust and talk to them about it. They can help you deal with your feelings.
You did nothing wrong. You are a great person who loved your dad very much and did the best you could to help him feel better.
2006-11-09 22:45:14 · answer #1 · answered by D W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It is not your fault.
People who commit suicide are most likely to have been affected by depression. Even people who are outgoing and extroverted can be depressed and it can go un-noticed. Depression is something which develops over time, not overnight - in serious cases it can last for years especially if the person does not seek help. Your father had probably been feeling depressed for a long time, possibly even a few years.
Your father's suicide is not related to your actions you've described. This was probably something he had been thinking about for awhile before he died.
Naturally you are thinking that there was something you could have done differently - like if you'd cooked a lovely dinner, or you had seen him in hospital. The truth is that you couldn't have done anything differently to change the outcome, because he had already decided on his own.
If you are still feeling that you are at fault, please, talk to someone you know and trust well. Please talk to a psychologist. The more we communicate rather than bottle up our feelings, the less likely we are to be depressed.
2006-11-09 23:07:51 · answer #2 · answered by Satinette 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd suggest you talk to you mom about this if you can but the truth of the matter is is it is not your fault, most dads would be happy if their kid tried to make them dinner even if they did burn it they would still be happy because it is the thought that counts, your dad most likely had severe depression and or there may have been other things going on in his life that you were unaware of, it wasn't your fault, not in the least bit, you should go talk to a counselour or your pastor at your church or even talk with your mom about this if you can
2006-11-09 22:35:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your dad was thinking about killing himself for a long time before you burnt the pizza. People who kill themselves have many complex reasons for doing this. It is normal for family to wonder if they could have stopped it, but the truth is they can't. you were 12 years old, you can't possibly have known what was going on in your dads head. even adults who have to deal with suicide of close family have trouble coping. Please stop blaming yourself. your dad was very sad about something, but it was no ones fault. Sometimes the sadness just comes from inside. the fact is, as much as it hurts, it is your dads fault he killed himself.
2006-11-09 22:40:48 · answer #4 · answered by Alice H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suicide is a choice by the person who takes their own life. This is not your fault. The choice your father made was most likely influenced by sever depression. When a person chooses to end his own life, he is the only one responsible for that decision, no on else, ever.
2006-11-10 12:29:17 · answer #5 · answered by julitasoup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, its is not your fault. Suicide was an idea the person had that committed. he didn't realize the aftermath of what would happen when he committed.
You are not alone. I asked that question to myself about my best friends two of them. One of them killed himself after graduation in the parking lot. My other friend slit her wrist.
It is okay to grieve, go through emotions.
YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME.
Read this article about suicide. It more indept and gives information.
2006-11-09 22:36:10 · answer #6 · answered by dee luna 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
AWW I'm sorry to hear that. But ya know what! NONE of it was your fault cause your dad was just obviously thinking about this for a while.So it is NOT your fault at ALL.
2006-11-09 22:41:15 · answer #7 · answered by CollaredShirt452 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Unless your hand was on the trigger. Its not your fault. Speak with his doctors, tell them how you feel. Im sure they will tell you som,ething thats missing from the picture. Obviously it was something he couldnt bear to live with and it couldnt possibly be the love of his child. Its normal to feel guilt, but let it go. Its simply not your fault, Im sure he woudl tell you that.
2006-11-09 22:35:04 · answer #8 · answered by metismaiden 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh honey, no. None of this is your fault - not in any way.
You should be receiving counseling for such a tramatic event. If you haven't been going, I suggest you do now.
2006-11-09 22:33:34 · answer #9 · answered by kja63 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
u were very brave to tell that in PUBLIC!!! special with me around but my answer is NO! It's not you're fault. Don't put all the blame on to yourself. CONDOLENCES!
2006-11-09 22:42:16 · answer #10 · answered by AnTon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋