Do you think it is extremely mean of parents to forget your birthday..? Not once,not twice,......?

Question

But just about every year!! My birthday is the 8th & they almost always think it is the 9th!!!! How mean is that..?And then they think that like if they give me more stuff then I will forgive them..? And they never even say sorry..they just say " Oh, well the 9th was your due date..BYE!" And then they leave to their own partys and fun!! Are they really mean..or are they what they say the are "VERY , VERY, VERY BUSY"..?

I mean what would you do if you were me?

But I'm only 14! And I think at least when your young your parents should remember your b-day!

Answer 1

I don't know about your parents...they may just be two disorganized, scatterbrained, immature people....or not. By now you realize all too well that having children is no guarentee of competent parenting.

But I think you do realize that they do feel badly about this, because you see that they overcompensate with gifts and material things. It also seems that they just don't understand how important it is to you-birthdays aren't as important to adults, you know.

There are a couple of ways you can address this; one is with humor, and posting signs in advance, perhaps just the number 8 with a birthday hat on it. Ask them if it's on their calendars right, and offer to fix it if not. Be very up front and very specific about what you want from them-a day out with mom, whatever. Then, if they still don't make the effort, it would be more fair to conclude they were being deliberately mean about it.

The other thing you can do is just stop expecting to ever get any recognition on your birthday....and then, when and if you receive anything, you can go way overboard with the thanks and really just be amazed that they remembered at all.

I hope you do have some other close and caring adult female relative who can step in somewhat to fill this void in your life. You are certainly a special, unique, discerning and intelligent young lady with a very loving heart.

best wishes (and happy birthday!)
cryllie (my daughter was born on the ninth...)

ps-gee, maybe you can tell them every month that your birthday is the 8th, and get presents every month? (;D

Answer 2

Yes, your parents should remember your birthday. They are obviously very inconsiderate. There is a big difference between mean and inconsiderate, but they both hurt. Maybe next year you can talk about your birthday a bit before the actual day, and that way they won't be able to forget it. Parents are not perfect, some are a bit kinder, and a bit more considerate but they all love their children. Take a minute and think of some of the nice, loving things that they've done for you over the years. Sometimes it's the little things that can leave the most lasting impressions...Think of that the next time they hug you, or tell you they love you.

Answer 3

Yeah, same here. At least your parents remember that you actually have a birthday. My parents amazingly doesn't even remember that I have a birthday. Every year, my sisters have to remind them and all they would say is "Really? I thought we celebrated it already." And what's ironic about this is the fact that we've NEVER celebrated my birthday together before! I've always spent it with friends and cousins. I've practically given up on them. So when my birthday comes around, I just tell them I'm going out and all they'll say is "Sure, bring your keys." No "Happy Birthday", "Have fun" or presents...NOTHING! *sighs* Some parents huh? So you see, you actually have it better than I do.

Answer 4

I'd talk to them and tell them that my birthday is the 8th not the 9th! Don't argue with them, just let them know how you feel about it. If your parents are the kind of persons that are busy all the time, and don't pay attention to you, then you'll have to deal with this situation. Try to become a better person by demonstrating them that you love them and you DO remember their birthday.

Answer 5

I'm sorry. Sounds lonely. I don't know what I would do. Next year, put a reminder note on the fridge a couple of days in advance. Maybe talk to them about how you feel. Tell them that you are seriously hurt by it. Maybe they don't think it's that big of a deal to you. I hope you had a happy birthday anyway with your friends. Good Luck!

Answer 6

Write them a letter about your feelings. Ask them to take the time and sit down and read it in front of you. Tell them it's important to you.
Then say, isn't part of life about memories. The ones you'll have of them when you get older won't be very memorable. When they are gone your memories will be them always being too busy for you. It's not fair to you.
It might be a wake-up call for them, maybe not.
Happy Birthday Sweetheart!

Answer 7

They just sound very, very immature and more concerned with themselves than with anyone else. I would sit them down and tell them exactly how you feel and ask them how they would feel if the situation were reversed. It may be that they're so caught up in themselves that they don't use this opportunity to make changes, but hopefully they will.

Regardless of what they choose, and they honestly aren't trying to be mean - it's just their priorities are scewy - stop being mad at them and pray for them to be enlightened to what's really important in life. Good luck!

Answer 8

I'll trade you!
my birthday IS the 9th, but my mom even forgets what month it is...sometimes she sends no card at all, sometimes she sends it in the wrong month. No, she's not senile, she just doesn't like me much. I've learned to live with it, you will too!

Answer 9

Hi there..Well, darlin' I am so sorry to hear that.I have much sympathy for you.Just know that in this world,you are not alone having a disaster birthday.My family forgot about mine before,I spent the entire day and night in tears..Cause they forgot,my mother went
to the gym to work out,my brothers did not say happy b.day to me,
they got me no gift..(them lousy slobs) My father humiliated me..
It was a truly sad experience, cause at that time I had no friends,no boyfriend, no nobody,no nothing..Just myself.

I've had many horrible bday experiences and this is why I do not like to celebrate it on the day I was born.I ignore it,I work..Instead
I celebrate it on a different day,like whatever my favorite number is, in that month. I am sorry to hear that,really..nobody should
have to go through that.

Think about it..You are their child, they agreed to have you..you know?.I know that if I had a kid, especially a little girl I would not
not not ever forget the day she was born..She'd be soo special to me, I'd give her so much happiness..I'd be so angry at them if I were you. But guilt trips always work..But here, do this.when their birthdays roll around, dont do nothing..Don't you dare go out of your way for them ,after they treated you like crap..
They should get nothing,they deserve nothing..

Just be like, you didn't get me nothing,so why should I do somehthing special for ya'll? I mean it's fair right?..Think about it..It is fair.

Answer 10

OK um ya make a note or may banner stating tat Ur bdae is on 8 th haha.. well dnt take it to heart go out wit frens to actually drift tem awy frm ur mind ok all the best..