i caught my 17 yr old son having sex what do i.?

Question

he lives with his grandmother and i know he would not have done that at her house.so i dont know why he thought it was cool at my house.

Answer 1

Well, for starters, if he is already having sex then you may not be able to stop him, especially since he doesnt live at home. Ironically both of my youngers sisters are pregnant, and I know what you are going through. My best advice to you as his mother is to sit him down and tell him the resposibilities of having sex, he is almost 18 and at that time he will be of legal age to participate in any activity he wishes to. So talk to him about safe sex and preventing STD's and pregnancy. He might think sex is fun, but when he finds out one day that he is going to be a dad, it will be too late. Try going to a planned parenthood in your neighbourhood and get pamphlets on STD info and safe sex, as well you can get information and samples on proper protection that you can show him to use if he continues to have sex. At least he will be prepared for the next time. As well, if you give him an adult to adult talk about sex, then he will be able to come to you in the future. The problem today is that many parents believe school will discuss all important sex info with students, when the fact is many teens learn more at home, because in class they may be afraid to ask questions is front of their peers or may just not pay attention. Give him that attention and talk to him openly, and let him know he can always turn to you. Its too late for my sisters now, but your son still has a chance to make things right, and go in the right path.
Best of Luck to you both!
Kat

Answer 2

Well, thank God that he is 17 and pray that this is the first time. As uncomfortable as it may make you, talk to him about condom use. Take him to the clinic in your town to get some information and to get some condoms. Tell him to talk to his girlfriend about how she should also be on birth control. Give him a lesson in unexpected pregnancy. As in the cost! Figure out a part time job salary, (on paper), take taxes out, take bills and rent out, then take him (by force if necessary) to the store with a pen and paper in hand. Have him write down the cost of diapers, Balmex, baby wipes, clothes, etc. also, make sure to include infant Tylenol, all of the things a baby HAS to have. Only the necessities. Then have him add all that up and subtract it from what is left of the paper paycheck. It will give him a rude awakening.

Answer 3

I would sit down and have a talk with him. I would try to not show how angry and disappointed I am but rather focus on the fact that you want him to have all the opportunities the world can offer. His life can change dramatically in seconds and you don't want him to have to limit what he can do in his life because he has the responsibility of being a parent before he is ready. Let him know that you understand his urges and feelings but those feelings have real consequences that he will have to live with for years to come. Talk to him about college and careers. Get him excited about his future. Let him know that you can't stop him but you want him to make good choices now so he can continue to have all the opportunities life can offer. Good luck.

Answer 4

i am unclear on whether you are upset because your 17 yr old is having sex or if it is because he is using your house. either way, go for the safe sex talk and remember that 17-19 yr old boys are one big walking hormone just looking to get laid.

and remember when you were that age before becomming shocked by his behavior.

although i didn't get pregnant for the first time until i was 26, i started having sex much yonger and had my first orgasm at 15. my sister gave birth to her first son at 17. let him know that there are many risks that last a lifetime in exchange for a few minutes of pleasure.

Answer 5

Hey, 17 yrs old isnt too old for his butt to be spanked. And this is coming from someone who's just that age. And have u talked to him about this and what it could do later on in his life? I don't know if you believe in not having premarital sex, but it could do a lot of damage, like making him a father sooner than expected... condom or no condom. Stuff like that and birth control aren't exactly fool-proof.

Answer 6

Buy your son some condoms so he doesn't pick up some kind of disease, or ending up getting a girl pregnant. I am sure he has done it at his Grandmothers house too, Remember being 17?

Answer 7

Punish him until he moves out from college cuz a 17 yr old should know not to do a thing like that!

Answer 8

Sit him down and tell him it's your house and not a hotel. Personally he is showing you disrespect and needs to be given a set of rules and boundries. Give him condoms for use elsewhere and make sure you call the girls parents. If it were my daughter I'd want to know and thus teach your son the respect he doesn't have.

Answer 9

Let me make sure I understand this .... Your son lives with his grandmother and you are surprised that he is having sex ??????

I dont know the reason that your son is living away from home .. but I gotta say that my kids will NEVER leave my house until they are old enough to live on their own.

It seems your son may be trying to make himself happy in lieu of his otherwise seemingly dis-functional childhood.

Answer 10

Well...make sure u have a talk with him about Safe sex and that if he is having sex to make sure he respects the girl and not pressure any girl into having sex with him...and be responsible! these r some important things a boy should know...if u want him to turn out to be a real man.