The other day my 5 year said someone on television was a bully. I thought it was a good time to discuss it. He really hasn't had to deal with one yet, but I was trying to think of the long term concepts on how to deal. If I tell him to teacher instead of deal with it himself, what is he going to do when he is an adult. If I tell him to stand up to the bully, what is he going to think when he gets kicked out of school if it becomes a fight?
I have been reading so much lately about how little things from your childhood can affect you your whole life. That is why I am trying to think about this 40 years out.
2006-11-09 08:36:35 · 9 answers · asked by thebuffettour 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Every single one of these responses so far (except Starlers's) will lead to MORE bullying. If not by the first one, then by others who sense any weakness as well.
Bullies look for and pick on the kids that can't or will not stand up for themselves. If this starts in the first or second grade, these are the same kids that he will most likely be going to junior high, and HS with.
It doesn't matter how much bigger the bully is, they are all cowards. Every single one of them. The best thing you can do at this age is teach your kid to stand up for himself, even if it means getting beat up, the bully will know that he isn't an easy target.
There's no such thing as a fair fight, and if the bully looks like an offensive lineman and yours looks like a kicker next to him, then he needs to learn a few things to even the ball field.
2006-11-09 09:00:51 · answer #1 · answered by Manny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 4 1/2 year old was telling me about some of the things he has been putting up with from an incipient bully in his school. I thought about my response for a while before comming up with tell the bully in a clear, projectiong voice "KNOCK IT OFF" it is rude and serious enough to make the bully think before proceeding and the other verbal responses just sound so wimpy they would attract more abuse than solve it. The teacher should only be involved as a last resort, this is the kind of thing kids need to sort out on their own.
2006-11-09 11:05:25 · answer #2 · answered by togetheradecade 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The best way to deal with a bully is to stand up to him. Fighting is never the right answer but, it should be avoided. The people bullies fear the most are those who they have no effect on. The child should not ignore the bully, but he/she should not also cower to him. Bully feed off of fear, like tyrants. If no one fears them, they have no power.
2006-11-09 08:53:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
this is a serious problem. bullying problem changed my life, and i have alot of fears, angers, and hate. i just want to start killing ppl everytime i get mad. so many things happened in my life. well, i'll tell u this. watch ur 5 year old, and don't let him get bullied. if he has any news of it, just start telling the school and do something about it immediately. u don't want him to be like me.
he has the right to tell an adult or teacher. but if he gets picked on or get hit by some bully he has the right to fight back, because its self defense. if he gets kicked out of school then the school is wrong.
2006-11-09 08:52:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
It is acceptable for a child to go to an adult because bullies are usually physically bigger than they are. Telling them to stand up to them could be harmful. You can not just deal with bullies once, it will be an ongoing process you deal with them differently as an adult because while you still might be smaller, or less powerful, you have the law on your side.
2006-11-09 08:40:14 · answer #5 · answered by fancyname 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
One think you can tell him is "Use your words!" He's allowed to say things in a clear, no-nonsense voice. He can say things like "I don't like it when you talk to me like that!" Or, "That's not nice!" Or, "You are hurting my feelings and I don't like it!" You can role play with him at home. You can pretend to be the bully and get him to say the appropriate thing in a no-nonsense voice. AND - you can let him play the role of the bully too - and you be the child that gets picked on. If a bully will not stop - have him practice walking away. If the bully gets physical - that's the time to bring the teacher or playground duty into the picture.
Hope that helps! You sound like a great Dad!!
2006-11-09 08:49:16 · answer #6 · answered by liddabet 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Tell him to stand up for himself, even if the bully beat his A ss, that it's important to get back up and defend your self
2006-11-11 09:03:42 · answer #7 · answered by This is just my opinion! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The idea is to teach him now what's the right thing to do. 1st - talk to the bully - tell him to stop. If that doesn't work - tell the teacher. That's what they are there for!
2006-11-09 08:40:42 · answer #8 · answered by Amy 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
They appeared to have observed you for the incorrect motives. on account that they are no longer your beginning mum and dad, and that they manage you incorrect, it is okay to sense such as you desire to go away. attempt going to varsity. if your sisters are your blood sisters, then according to risk you ought to discover a thank you to get extra effective preserve them, yet stay with them, by way of fact they're your blood kin. i assume that your adoption mum and dad are family contributors, so it could be no longer effortless to go away. it is okay to tell others approximately stuff, merely it is not any longer one hundred% secure on account which you're under no circumstances one hundred% confident on the topic of the persons you tell stuff to. you ought to be attentive to what's nice for you and the ultimate people who can get you there. so an prolonged way as facebook, is your mom actually looking over your shoulder, or did she pal you and that's how she examining your stuff? do no longer submit inner maximum information, or information that should ocmpromise your secure practices, and there are a thank you to make your facebook inner maximum, so google a thank you to make facebook inner maximum or look on the facebook pages of privateness and secure practices placing etc. while people do no longer want you to tell others approximately how they manage you and it is incorrect, speaking approximately it is "betrayal", there is a few thing incorrect with them so watch them, watch how they deal which includes your sisters, by way of fact some people have stuff to cover while they do no longer want you telling even your persons approximately them, in case you have genuine acquaintances. don't be discourage by way of fact the demean you, your existence, your sisters and your destiny are the bigger photograph. attempt new child conserving centers/police if issues get extremely undesirable, yet save your sisters, they're immature naive babies with out stable influential mum and dad to tell them to hearken to you by way of fact the mature vast sister. do no longer run away, it merely isn't on your prefer. in the event that they bodily abuse you or the psychological/emotional abuse gets worse, checklist it. save the guidelines yet do no longer do something to harm your self bodily or your destiny or your sisters. Technically you're a youngsters (so an prolonged way as you have under no circumstances had any studies, you're merely 18, yet legally an person so which you will talk for your self.
2016-12-14 04:28:09 · answer #9 · answered by vogt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋