If you've ever heard the words, "your tests came back positive for cancer," what was your first response?

Question

A week after the birth of my son, I was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 25. Since, I have had surgery and received treatment, but I can't explain how calm I was when I first heard the news.

Answer 1

My 17 year old son had not been feeling well. He had a blood test which indicated that he had hypothyroidism. His belly was also swelling. We went to see an endoconologist who tapped on my sons belly and than said he thought more was going on than hypothyroidism. We didn't have a clue. He sent us back to our family doctor, who referred us to a major medical center. We were told to drive him there as quickly as possible and not stop. He was admitted at 11pm and we were all exhausted. The pediatric residents on the floor examined him and that was the first time I heard the word cancer. He had a lump in his neck (lympth nodes), under his arm pits, and groin. His belly was swollen and filled with fluid. He couldn't eat anything at all, but they asked him to swallow a liter of contrast for a CT. I really don't know how he did it.

The entire time we were all calm, just anxious to find out the extent of the cancer. Everytime a doctor walked into the room the news just got worse and worse. My son at 17 handled it all calmly. A team of doctors came in (with the social worker - we quickly learned that when the social worker comes in with the doctors its probably not good news). My son had a volley ball size tumor in the abdominal cavity, tumors on the large and small intestine, rectum, spleen, liver, chest wall, spots on lungs, diaphragm, and malignant asicitis. Whew. I never felt so sick in my life listening to this news. My son was given a choice at that time . . to go home or to stay and fight his disease.

And, in that maddeningly calm and philosophical way he has he asked, "Well . . is there any treatment for this?"

He was told that there was a possibility that the tumors might respond to chemotherapy. Since it was a rare, very aggressive sarcoma, we were told that there were no guarantees, but they would help him fight it if that is what he wanted.

His response was, "Well. Let's do it than."

And, with every treatment he's had in the past 19 months he's had the same response. There is no protocol and few treatment options for his cancer but his pediatric oncologist and team has worked tirelessly looking for answers. They have been amazing.

After 8 months of high dose chemotherapy his tumors responded significantly to the treatment. His primary tumor shrunk over 50%, others disappeared totally, he was able to have one surgical debulking to remove 75% of visible tumors. Last year at this time he still had active cancer and was asked he would like to try an experimental procedure where they heat the chemicals and bathe the abdomen with them. This was to address the tiny and microscopic disease that had embedded onto the diaphragm. All he said was, "Let's go create some information about this. If it works . . we'll know its a good treatment . . if it doesn't work . . we'll still be creating valuable information."

He had the surgery, they removed his spleen, the tumors on his intestines peeled off, and scrapped as much of the tumor from the diaphragm that they could. The experiment worked and he had no evidence of disease for the past 8 months.

Very early on, I would say during those first horrible moments of diagnosis we all made the determination to remain positive. To face news whether it was good or bad. And enjoy each moment that we had. We also learned to 'live inside the box' when we need to . . to close out any thoughs of the future . . he is here now, in the moment . . and that is how we live each day. This is not to say that we havn't had some gut wrenching, pretty much primordial crying at times . . but at the end of the day, what good is that. You still need to face the facts, good or bad, and just deal with it.

After 8 months of remission, he has recently had two nodules reappear on the dome of the liver between the diaphragm. And, so we begin the fight again.

He starts chemotherapy next week . . on his 19th birthday, a day we thought we might never see. I cannot describe the joy we all feel to have him here with us. He has had excellent quality of life
and a fantasitc attitude. Yesterday he had his third central line put in and he joked with his surgeon all the way into the operating room. We go forward with hope. :-)

Thank you for sharing your amazing story. Give your son a hug from me.

Answer 2

I was diagnosed at the age 26 years old, after taking hormones for two years in the hopes of having another baby. When I was told I had Breast Cancer, I was calm as well. It seemed so unreal to me that I really don't think I got it at first and by the time I did realize that it was all 'real' I had all ready started treatment and it was a part of my life. I am still in treatment and my cancer has spread to my liver and cervix. Even was I was told that, I wasn't angry at first. In my heart I all ready knew things were not right. People always say to me....oh no did you cry and scream? No, I didn't have time. I just got up the next day and started planning the plans on how to beat this awful diease. I know my odds aren't the best on recovering from all of this, but I believe I will, and I believe my husband and I will have a 50 wedding annverisay. This diease will not kill me, if I die....it will be from the fight.
Take Care and I hope that things are going well for you. Best of luck with everything!

Answer 3

At the time you had a 1 wk old baby and this was something you just had to get through. I understand, the best I can. My middle child was diagnosed with a Wilms Tumor in July 2005. My youngest was just 2 wks old. I was very calm when the diagnosis came. What could I do? We just picked up and kept kept going. My son is doing great now! He had 6 radition treatments and about 6 months of chemo. For the record he was 3 1/2 at the time of diagnosis.

Answer 4

I was diagnosed with cancer when I was at the peak of my job , as senior management of one of the most reputed and expensive automobile companies in the world. It was by chance, when one day I lost my voice for about ten minutes, I decided to do something about it and thats when I was told about my cancer and the staging was at 4. That did not look too bad to me as I did not know too much about stages in Cancer- till I was told that it was the last stage! Surprisingly, I took the news very calmly and always treated Cancer like a cold that would go away in due time. The cancer did go away but certainly left its scars behind and heartaches for a lot of people. Even today, just as pre cancer, I enjoy my life with the same zest I always did. I have never looked back and have forgotten all the pain I went through. In fact even on date very few people know the extent of pain I have been through. The world sees me as a person always full of life and with a will to live a happy life. The cancer too had its positives and taught me a number of lessons. To name a few - it made me more humane, it made me more modest, it made me realise how many people suffered and the pain they were going through, it made me realise that life is a gift and should be used with a lot of tender and care and not abused as I would do earlier.
I really admire your guts as you took the news so calmly and that too a week after the birth of your son. It shows your inner strength and when you have this strength you can always fight cancer on its own terms and win. Well done.

Answer 5

My Mom was diagnosed about a year ago with breast cancer, and she took it better than any of us did. She was very calm when she heard the news. She's gone through all of the treatments, in fact she had her last treatment last Friday and everything is good. She told me that the reason she was so calm was a way of protecting herself and not letting the situation get out of control, she controled herself therefore has some control on the situation. Good luck with your treatments.

Answer 6

I had to leave a message with my doctor that it was ok to call me at work with the results of a biopsy. It was Memorial Day weekend and I couldn't stand not knowing any longer. So she calls and tells me, I call my husband and then told my boss, who lost his first wife to cancer. Everyone at work was surprised by how calm I was. I felt it better to keep busy than to roll up into a ball and cry (which I did a lot during treatement). My sister is a 13 year survivor and my dad a 7 year survivor so it didn't surprise me that someone else in the family may get cancer also.

My prayers are with everyone who has shared their stories by answering this question.

Answer 7

People react differently for sure. I found out just over a yr. ago that I had breast cancer. I was calm. I suppose there is an element of shock. I never told my family for about 2 wks. I wasn't particularly upset or afraid either. I think you use this time as a defense mechenism. I somehow knew I needed time to wrap myself around the situation. I finally told my husband & sons. But for awhile I didn't want to talk about it to others. Later I figured this much out. I had decided to put up a dam good fight, say the word cancer to people & immediately they become scared & negative thoughts come out of them. Not they mean to cause harm but I did not need or want this. Until I had built up my courage I was very selective on who know. There were some rough days to be sure, but I beat it, & I feel very good now. People often create their own coping mechenism. Letting them know that is okay is a big help.

Answer 8

I'm not sure if you are a Christian, but I am and I felt the very same calm that you felt. I never felt the gripping fear that many people experience with a cancer diagnosis, I knew that God still loves me and would see me through my treatment (I have my last one tomorrow, friday)

Now, when I heard that I'd have to do a bone marrow biopsy, that was a different story (I'm sort of a wuss for pain)

Hope all is well with you

Answer 9

The doctor told me.. you either have 3 things... leukemia, a blood infection, or you might get paralyzed...
i didnt say anything just left.. around the corner me and my mom burst out crying...
and then when she gave the news she said i couldnt hear it b/c it would make me more nervous and cause stress which would make my condition worse ...so the doc told my mom...
and from there on all i did was pray and hope that i could survive..
and today im here b/c God made a miracle.. b/c according to eveyr doctor i went i had 6 weeks to live...
hope you get better....
my stepmom just finished her treatment for breast cancer!
best wishes!

Answer 10

I had ovarian cancer when I was 19! I remember the day my doctor called me to tell me to "come in, bring my family, and have a chat". I was petrified for next 24 hours until I met with him. Then, when I actually started to listen to what he said, I was like, "I cna beat this!" I told my family. They were way more upset than I was. I just laughed it off and was like, "if I die, it's cheaper for you all! My brother can have my room!"

Anyway, that was 13 years ago! But I still get very nervous when I get the results of any type of medical tests. I've learned to ask a lot of questions about my health.