you thought you knew but they turned out to be another way? i know it's common, but i was really really happy and in love with my guy for two years but right now he is real controlling and manipulative. anything bad gets turned back on me. even if it was his fault, like thinking about getting another woman's number he's like 'well, you made me do that. now YOU know how it feels when guys are checking you out'. the rest of the time is sweet as candy, he makes me laugh so much and is passionate and everything. I think the man i loved though has gone. but i loved him so much, that i stay. he's the one i stay for! have you ever had a relationship like that?
2006-11-09 03:50:41 · 6 answers · asked by sleepyme 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I can relate to what your are going through. I didn't understand it when I was in a similar relationship. But years later after, leaving the verbal & physical abuse that manifested from my guys personality change. And after many years of studying Psychology I reached a point of understanding. As individuals become more immersed in relationship toeach other you start to see one another at your best & at your worst ! Some emotions can be quite raw to say the least. Its sound like your guy has become more contolling and manipulative. Those are signs that he is feeling insecure. Perhaps he's afriad to loose you and possibly with good reason. He senses you're not in love with him any more and gets both jealous & insecure when other guys "check you out" It's easy to think the man you once loved is gone, But the truth his he's still there right in front of you when he's making you laugh and when his insecurites are rearing their ugly heads. If you want to continue to have a realtionship with each other you're both going to have to spell out what's disturbing to you about the others behavior. Your friendship will either deepen & mature. Or possibly end because you're not mature enough to identify & work through these issues. You can love someone and not like certain behavioral traits they possess. If you value your freindship you should be able to be open & honest, ( without being cruel) in discussing the issues and decideing together what you want to do...work things out of part ways.
2006-11-09 05:29:01 · answer #1 · answered by Brains & Beauty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, yes i have. It is not your fault it is control and mental abuse which almost always go to physical b4 too long. He has chosen to be an abusive man and no matter how much you love him...leave..it never gets better. the only thing getting better is his lies and the mean things he will put you through. come on ..that is like telling a woman it was her fault she got raped and killed or her fault her child was beaten down! it is the universal cop out for stupid abusive azzhole men!!!!!!!!
2006-11-09 03:55:59 · answer #2 · answered by ***BUTTERFLY*** 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to talk to him about it . There are certain "personalities" in realtionships that role play in a couple's relationship...
He may be on the edge of becoming a control freak and never wants to accept the blame for the misbehavior when he is with you....but expects you to accept it...
2006-11-09 04:01:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I married that kind of person. This is a big RED flag. You need to move on. He won't change. Trust me you will unhappy with part-time happy.
2006-11-09 03:54:25 · answer #4 · answered by Patty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess your happiness isn't worth much... you deserve to be in a relationship like that... learn he will never change... remember your the ONLY person who can make your self happy!
2006-11-09 03:54:02 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hes neurotic, he will always blame you for everything that goes wrong with him. he has the problem. ask him to go with you to couples counseling and if he refuses, leave.
2006-11-09 04:01:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋