How can I get my husband to change his mind over getting a dog?

Question

My son would love a dog, and I suggested getting a rescue greyhound, but my hubby will not entertain it. He wouldnt see any harm come to an animal but says he just dosent want one in the house. (Germs, mess, smells etc.,)
I can see where he's coming from after working hard for nice things in our house and generally he'd give our son the world, so he must feel quite strongly!
But I think its important for kids to feel responsible for something and learn all about life.. and death

Answer 1

I think your view on getting a dog is absolutely right, plus it is such a wonderful companion for the entire family. But let me tell you something: if you force him or convince him against his will (or even worse, get one anyways, what a bad advice!!) he might turn against the dog. I am a dog rescuer and I've seen this happen many times. The whole family has to agree on it. The only solution is that you take your time (my dad took 10 years to convince my mom and I had my first dog at 13) to make him understand that it's not such a big deal if there's a little scratch on the carpet. True, money is money, but what would you do to your son if he puked on the sofa? Punish him? Accidents happen to kids, people and animals :) With proper training, love and patience, any dog can make a great addition to a family. Hope you'll find a way to make him understand! Otherwise how about a cat or any small pet to teach your child about responsibilities? Maybe your husband will like having pets and will be more open to the idea of a dog later on.

Answer 2

If your husband does not want a dog do not get one and try and force the issue as the dog is the one who will ultimately pay the price. You will end up getting rid of the dog or your husband and 9 times out of 10 it is the dog that goes.
I work in rescue and I see it way to often one person wnats a doberman and the other does not. The dog stays for a time and then has to go. It is heartbreaking for the people (they failed) and the dog who can not figure out what happened.
It is traumatic and hard on all involved.
If your husband feels that strongly about it do not force the issue.
Turn it around with something he wants and you do not think how it would feel.
Learning about life and being responsible come from many other things and not having a pet. Learning about life buy a good book or something don't let your child learn on a living being.

Answer 3

I understand your reasons for wanting a dog, but it just has to be a joint decision, with all members of the family happy and aware of the huge committment they are taking on. Please don't go behind your husband's back and get one anyway. Its not fair to bring a dog into an environment where he can sense that he is not wanted by everyone in the house...... Adopting a dog from rescue is the best way (in my opinion), but the last thing any dog, least of all a rescue needs is to spend a little time in a new home, only for it not to work and have to be sent back :( Perhaps as others have suggested, go for a smaller pet first, he'll hopefully see this as a compromise on your part, and then see how you feel about getting a dog in a year or so .....

Answer 4

A dog is a HUGE responsibility. It really needs to be a family decision because it will effect the whole family.
Even though you and your son would like to have a dog, your husband is part of the family and deserves to have his feelings taken into consideration.
If you fail to do this, your husband will feel resentful towards you. He may come to love the dog as much as you and your son, and he may not.

Getting one anyway, and taking the chance that your husband will feel resentful is a huge risk.

By the way, from personal experience, if you let a dog live inside the house with you.. your house will NEVER be the same again. Especially a large dog. I did ths very thing for my son who also wanted a dog. We got a 14 week old puppy and of course began immediately with potty training, but until he was trained completely... which took about 8 months... he DID go inside the house. Even though we bought him toys galore.. he STILL chewed on things we didn't want him too. Chair legs, and anything we happened to leave in his reach like library books etc.

That "puppy" is now over 70lbs.. and he is still growing. He's a good boy most of the time. But, a dog is still a big deal.

Answer 5

1) Ask for a greyhound, he may settle for a chihuaha.
2) Take home a rescue on a trial basis thru an animal rescue or If you have a friend with a good dog, ask to borrow for a trial run.
*do not get a high maintence dog:
*must be at least 1 year old and house trained and crate trained
*dont get a dog that sheds a lot (ex: dont get a lab, collie, husky, etc)
*get a small dog that is not high energy, try a daschund mix or a dog with a personality you think would mesh with your husband and be gentle with your son
3) Tell your son that you are babysitting and the dog has to go home (in case you get a bad match or your husband cant stand it)
4) Be prepared to be the primary care taker of the dog, if you cannot commit to this then don't try a dog, try a chincilla or a hamster or ferret or even a cat
5) make sure you discuss this with your husband and ask him to compromise, I wouldnt do it behind his back let him know that you can do this on a trial basis.

Answer 6

Please think carefully; if you want a dog then all members of the family must feel the same way. If you get a rescue it is very important, as one member of the family behaving towards the dog as if they don't like it will cause anxiety and behavioural problems; for which the dog will then be blamed.
And while its a nice idea to get a rescued greyhound they are notoriously difficult to housetrain.
If your husband feels that strongly about a dog it would be fairer to get a small pet that could live in your sons bedroom, rats are ideal and can be litter trained so the smell is kept to a minimum.

Answer 7

I think you should do plenty of research into the kind of dog that would be most suitable for your family. My husband was exactly the same but i thought sod this! i am an adult and i am not being told what to do, dogs give children so much. I have an autistic son and an older boy and i bought a cocker spaniel *****, and for children there could not be a better breed. My husband has fallen in love with our little dog now and she is a member of the family. My husband was not happy at first but every time i went out of the room he kept playing with it thinking that i could not hear. Dont expect him to clear up any dog mess though! that would be taking the mickey. Seriously, i would keep on at him until he agrees, and if he is being to stubborn, go behind his back. I did and it paid of. If he does not like it, tell him to go walkies, you will probably get more fun with the dog anyway. remember though if you get a pup, do not leave it on its own for long periods and infest in a puppy crate. That way your dog wont chew up your home.

Answer 8

My hubby was NOT a dog person either...I got him to visit a litter of 7 week old golden retrievers, one fuzzy little girl fell asleep while he was holding her, and I think you can guess, we came home with her. Seven years later we have two goldens, and our little girl (not so little anymore) never leaves his side. What if you tried to "kill him with puppy cuteness"?

Please make sure your son is old enough to take on the responsibility of a dog. Walks, exercise, training, clean-up, food, water etc, etc, etc, added to a school schedule and all the activities that go with it may not leave your son enough time for this BIG RESPONSIBILITY. Please make sure you research the breed that will best suit your family & lifestyle. This can make or break the hubby and how he relates to the dog.

As far as the germs, mess, smells...Granted, I do run the vacum daily, and dust every other day. I keep the dogs on a grooming schedule so they are never dirty or smelly. Above all, the dogs are well trained and know better then to beg for people food, jump on guests or mess in the house.

The rewards of having a loving, loyal pet far outweigh the work & responsibility they require. My hubby is the first to admit he never wanted a dog, but came around when he understood the happiness they can bring to a family.
Good Luck!!!

Answer 9

This is a tough one. Maybe suggest to your husband that you bring in a rescue dog for a month or two and see how it goes. It would probably be best not to look at puppies and to find an older dog that is beyond chewing phase and house trained.

So sorry your hubby is so against having a pet in the home. Back in my days of dating, I never got seriously involved with any man who didn't like animals and would have a problem living with them. I love my husband, but couldn't see living without a dog or two in my home either.

Good luck with this, I hope he gives it a go for you!

Answer 10

Has your son and husband talked about this? Definately have a family discussion about it first. When my fiance and I were still dating, i had 3 dogs in my house and he couldnt stand it. He loved animals but just felt they should be outside. Now that we live together, he cant stand the thought of leaving them outside when we go somewhere! If your son really wants one and can talk Dad into letting one in the house, im sure his heart will soften up. I applaud you for wanting to adopt a rescue dog. If one of the factors is Dad doesnt want an animal messing up things in the house, start out with an adult dog. He may freak out when he comes home and a puppy has had a field day with a pair of shoes.