Me and my boyfriend have been on and off for the past 4 years. We recently got back together cause we can't seem to let each other go but we keep arguing over the most stupid things and now I think i've ruined things? I've got 2 weeks till we go on a make or break weekend away any tips on how to keep my man as I know he is the love of my life and that we just need to get through this rough patch.
2006-11-08 21:26:23 · 19 answers · asked by tasty.tan 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have a simple choice. Either stop arguing or split up.
2006-11-08 21:31:31 · answer #1 · answered by bluenose 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
on and off for 4 years? sounds horrible. Bet your friends are sick of seeing you in tears over him! If you argue all the time and make eachother miserable then perhaps you should ask yourself why you cant let eachother go.
But your question is how to keep him, so i think the answer is to be understanding in every situation that may present an opportunity for an arguement try to stay calm and put your self in his shoes (count to 10 if you have to!). Think about timing. If there is something you need to discuss that could be a potential argument think about doing this at a good time
Avoid times like:
when one of you has just got home from work (as tired and need to sit down and relax after a long day)
or
when you both are hungry (people are irritable when they are hungry - they might not even realise the reason for their mood is beacause they haven't eaten)
or
Late at night, or before going to bed (as obviously tired so not in best state of mind), and before going to sleep - it is best to keep conversations simple otherwise you wont get to sleep very easily and end up being tired and grouchy in the morning!)
try to be patient and keep control if you feel like an argument is brewing. If you think you are the one that has ruinned things then i'm guessing you flew off the handle at him. So just try to be the one in control in an argument, be calm, keep your tone level and avoid getting high-pitched and shouting. If you can do this when some one is winding you up then you are a better person than me! I try to stay calm but when some-one knows how to get a reaction from you then they will use it and it is hard to be the calm, mature and in-control one! Good luck, hope you enjoy your weekend away.
2006-11-09 06:13:00 · answer #2 · answered by Estee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOVE HAS NO GUARANTEES.
Anyway girl, you have to know by now that men are like babies. When they want something, whether it's right or wrong, they'll kick and scream about it until they get it.
My suggestion is when you argue about silly little things, let him win the argument, it'll give him a sence of power and you wont lose a nail over it. Tell him what he wants to hear, u'll get away with anything. Make him feel like the boss and in the meantime do what you like.
DO NOT SHOW HIM U LOVE HIM TOO MUCH, let him hunt for it!
Go easy on him, men are usually very sensitive,fragile beings with too much to prove.
2006-11-09 05:51:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the chemistry, nurture, nature likely will dictate that the arguing will continue. your hearts are in heaven but your heads make you put your feet in your mouths. there likely is great sex, thoughts and affections. it is what it is. maybe the two of you could have a born again religious experience, or something similar, that may be the only chance at real change to be selfless. maybe read about ghandi or some stuff there. it seems like the arguing relationships have the high highs...
2006-11-09 05:34:36 · answer #4 · answered by Millenium Man 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you argue so much?
Is it because you always have to be right?
Do you really like your boyfriend?
Were you brought up in a family that argued?
If you know the answers to these questions then no doubt you will solve the problem.
Do you really love him and all his faults?
Do you need to concentrate on his good quality's? If you are truthfull when asking yourself these questions you will find the answer.
2006-11-09 05:41:35 · answer #5 · answered by Supersammy :o) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't keep someone; love is supposed to be about free will; he'll stay if he wants to. If you really want to be with him, think back to when you first got together, how you felt and look at what the person your boyfriend fell in love with was like. If you are still that same person then you have your answer..
2006-11-09 05:33:03 · answer #6 · answered by madfairy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you keep argueing especially over things that are not important it means whoever starts the argument is looking for a way out psycologically.
good sex life does not mean love.
if you are in love you can overcome anything and the arguements will find thier own solutions and will be less of them!
therefore you wont need to "keep him" but love him.
2006-11-09 05:31:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop arguing... Let the matter drop before arguing... Or you could just go straight to bed when you feel an argument brewing.
2006-11-09 05:29:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
True love doesn't know 'Rough Patches' , Sorry to be harsh but let each other go - It will be hard of course,- but you are stopping each other from growing and being truly happy...
2006-11-09 05:30:40 · answer #9 · answered by mark leshark 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really want to know? Keep your mouth shut hon, especially on subjects you know that will cause arguments! This really applies to the both of you! lol. I really think you should show him this thread so he'll understand how serious it really is to you. Don't worry, it'll turn out for the good! And have a good day!
2006-11-09 05:36:12 · answer #10 · answered by wheeliebin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋