My 38 year old bf and I got into an argument.I havent liked the way he has been living his life drinking, partying etc...His friends are a**es & are dragging him down. So I pulled away to distance myself. Last week he calls & says that he is going to stop hanging with his friends and he is ready to act like a mature adult. Later that evening (Holloween night) I get a call at 2:30 AM from him.He tells me he is in a limo with his friends, he was very sarcastic. I can hear guys yelling, girls hollering and loud music. So I hung up on him. What the hell did he call me for? To rub it in my face? If he wouldn't have called me I would have never known. I havnt talked to him since. Its been a week. Yesterday he blew up my phone begging me to pick up.We have been together for a long time. But it is scaring me because I honestly don't care anymore. His immature ways has really turned me off. I never thought I would see the day when I didnt care anymore. What is going on with me?
2006-11-08 19:42:44 · 22 answers · asked by sweetie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To answer a couple questions, I am 33 years old. Yes he has been like this all of his life. But enough is enough its time to grow up I mean gosh hes pushin 40! and he hangs with guys half his age (20's). I like to go out to sometimes. But I don't make it my life. With the friends he picks and the things he does, I have lost all respect for him. I think I have outgrown him.
2006-11-08 20:29:40 · update #1
Nothing is wrong with you. You finally came to your senses. Be proud of yourself.
2006-11-08 19:47:17 · answer #1 · answered by Jules 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello, one thing is important to know, 1) how old are you? It is natural that women are more mature then men, roughly a difference from 6 years. There are pros and cons to this as I have noticed this in my own relationships. As a Virgo I am a bit more level headed as most males in my age (39) but my desire to still have fun and enjoy life bothered my soon to be ex wife who would have rather spend a quiet night on the couch watching TV. There is only one reason to stay home at night and TV is not it ;-)
But like I said, men do not want to grow up and this could be good in a way, with the right woman who can keep up and keep him in line at the same time it will keep things jumping, with the wrong woman who does not understand or wants to slow down, it is deadly, the man will feel bored and he will get wilder. Something to think about.
2006-11-08 19:59:28 · answer #2 · answered by Charlie 1967 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you wish your 7 yr historical round anybody smoking weed? If it does not hassle you, then opt for it. But it most likely bothers you. As does his mendacity. Mature folks don't inform lies to their SO. What is the factor? I would not have a crisis with him going out along with his peers as soon as a month. In truth, that's no longer very ordinarily in any respect. But going to a strip membership?? Really???!!! That is immature. Ask your Dad whilst was once the final time he went to a strip membership. Mature guys wish intercourse simply up to more youthful guys, and should you feel they do not you're an fool. Mature guys simply do not waste their cash on whatever as dull as a strip membership. Geez, spend the equal sum of money and honestly GET a few rather of simply watching at it.
2016-09-01 09:40:42 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are all guys immature? no Is his behavior normal? yes.
behaviors are "learned". he acts out now because he saw this type of behaviors in the past- whether it was his parents, aunts and uncles or other adults that were a part of his life growing up.
he is obviously not ready to grow up. he still enjoys his partying lifestyle and sadly, there is nothing YOU can do to change him. He has got to want the change.
What is going on with you? nothing. you've come to realize that these behaviors are not for you. despite the history you both share, it's normal and okay to move on.
once you leave, he may realize what he had was great and may come back a changed man. :) let's see. Good luck!
2006-11-08 20:00:11 · answer #4 · answered by angel eyes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how old are you but probably this is the last moment to change and establish your life. Is nothing wrong to be with somebody immature if is guiding to the future, but here is just dead end of the road. If you leave him is going to be hard because you used to be and spend time together. You get freedom and mind, you can depends on yourself and respect yourself and get the goals to go for. In life is like you have to give something to get something - nothing for free. I hope you don't want pay more of your life time to be torture by sarcastic funny playboy but that's what he likes to be.
2006-11-08 19:58:48 · answer #5 · answered by Toto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am saying this from a man's point of view. Yes, men can become asses sometimes and act in unexpected ways. If he will clean up his act and stop hanging with his immature friends, then that's a beginning. However, it is your life and your feelings that you are in touch with. If you feel you can no longer respect him or even like him, then call it quits.
2006-11-08 20:02:20 · answer #6 · answered by seek_fulfill 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
better now than never. its never too late to dump him like a hot potato, before he does that to u and breaks ur heart. just move on and u'll find a better guy who loves u and cares for u, and most importantly respects u. this guy does'nt respect u and u should'nt bother about him any more. just tell him that that's it and get over with it. just be stubborn and dont let him cajole u back into it all over again. just make up ur mind and stick by it. u r more important to u than him. so be strong and firm. take care.
2006-11-08 19:53:56 · answer #7 · answered by wow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very mature and he is as you say very immature.
You are right in ignoring him. I would change my telephone number to make him understand you don't want any thing more to do with him.
Not all men are like him and I'm sure you will eventually find a decent mature male somewhere out there.
2006-11-08 19:52:52 · answer #8 · answered by sadgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reality. You finally get it. He just wasn't that interested. If he was, why would he try to hurt you and make you feel so uncomfortable. As far as him begging to come back, would you ever really trust him if you did take him back. Wouldn't you always wonder if he was talking or telling private stuff to his friends so they could ridicule you? I hate this kind of behavior...Sorry girl, I've been there and put up with that..NO MORE!!!! He is actually pathetic if you look at him in broad daylight!
2006-11-08 19:48:59 · answer #9 · answered by e_piphany214 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There is nothing wrong in your way of thinking, it is his thinking that is messed up. It is time to move on. You want a mature relationship while he still wants to live like he is 20 years old.
2006-11-08 21:13:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
guys are late bloomers, but i dont think your bf is considered as one.... his not immature... its his choice of living... all the partying and going out with his friends proves his choice... honestly you did the right thing he didn't even care for your feelings and besides if ever you get back with him and one day decided to marry him... how sure are you that he will never ever do it again... as i've said its a choice he made and possibly thats the way he wanted to live his life
2006-11-08 19:58:03 · answer #11 · answered by *Pretty Pink* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋