there's this guy i know but not really as friend, we used to work together on the same company but different department. he came one day for official reason and asked things. i told him been stressed out with work plus home plus the wedding plans plus the expenses etc etc etc..to cut it short, he offered to buy me my wedding gown, as a wedding present, any way i like it. he even called my fiance right there and then to ask if its okei. my fiance, caught unprepared said yes. when he left, my fiance said that he doesn't want the idea.
i've said yes and he had said yes to the wedding-gown-as-wedding-gift-guy, the idea would help us minimize our budget,
but how am i supposed to turn down his offer.
2006-11-08 19:16:28 · 15 answers · asked by enigma 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
While your fiance said yes initially he did let you know that he was unprepared for that and in the end didn't feel comfortable with it. And honestly I don't think I would either. If some woman had offered to buy my husband's wedding band it would not have been okay with me.
You just need to call this acquaintance and tell him. It will be a bit uncomfortable but just tell him that while you appreciate the offer you need to turn it down.
2006-11-08 19:20:46 · answer #1 · answered by Elisabeth R 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Say that you discussed this but your mother would like to pay for the dress. If that doesn't work, say that your mother / grandmother / relative has a wedding dress that you'll be using for the wedding instead so no thanks. Don't take this gift, its just too expensive and lie your way out of it....if nothing works, say that your fiance is not comfortable with the idea, it was a great offer and your're really grateful but you don't want to cause this problem in your wedding. Don't take this gift no matter how much you want it, he's not really a friend so it could get thrown back in your face later on...best to pay for it yourself, try a simpler one if the budget is so less and you can even rent because you'll never wear it again.
2006-11-08 21:02:18 · answer #2 · answered by DrSH 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At the first place, you should not have accepted the offer since you have mentioned that its just an acquaintance, not really a Friend. No wonder why your fiance is worried on his consent he had given without much thought.
OK, you can always tell him, without hurting his feelings that you have presented this idea to your parents, and that's when you knew that they have already planned to purchase it for you, and that you would not want to hurt them now. Put it nicely, am sure it will work out.
Congratulations on your wedding!
2006-11-08 19:41:14 · answer #3 · answered by lapiz lazuli 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should explain to your fiance how much this would help with the wedding expenses. You need to try to make him understand but with all that said you also need to listen to everything he has to say and try to understand where he is coming from. You also need to make sure that your friend understands that it is just a gift and that he will not be getting anything in return but a very nice thank you note. Be honest with each of them and explain your feelings. But I have to tell you if a guy friend of mine wanted to pay for my dress and my b/f did not like the idea I would just tell him that my parents or some other family member bought it for me. Good luck and congrats!!!!
2006-11-08 19:46:20 · answer #4 · answered by aprils242001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello, i think both yourself & your fiance should accept the offer because its an wedding gift to help you enjoy your special night together, and your fiance sounds he's jealous which he shouldn't.
Its a nice gesture from someone who wants to lend a happy hand, so just sit together & reason with your fiance not to be upset on the idea.....talking from experience i've came at the end a very happy person because the people i've helped were very gratefull at the end.
Bye from Australia!
2006-11-08 19:26:18 · answer #5 · answered by AGS429 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why turn it down, its a blessing - did this guy ever do anything to make u feel uncomfortable? If so respectfully reject his offer tell him your mom wanted to buy it as a surprise it wont hurt his feelings, but if hes been an ok guy why not accept his wonderful gesture some people are just that nice! Congrats on the wedding
2006-11-08 19:20:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are so right, it would really help you and your fiance with the expenses.. Speak to your fiance, tell him it would realy help out. He probably is hurt and doesnt like the idea because he isn't able to buy it for you himself. Tell him at the end of the day you are marrying him and you do love him so he mustnt worry about feeling taken aback or insecure.
2006-11-08 19:24:40 · answer #7 · answered by Ms innocent 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him you've had second thoughts, and would feel unduly indebted to him for his generosity.
I have trouble with the propriety of this situation, and think it's strange (both his offer and your willingness to accept).
Your fiance is right.
Good luck.
2006-11-08 19:24:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think I would rather get married I paid for even if it is not the top of the line or my first choice. After all, how can you commit the rest of your life and love to one man while clad in another mans dress?
Ewwwe
No thanks.
Good luck
2006-11-08 20:52:09 · answer #9 · answered by donamarie_1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hope that ur fren reads this question and understands ur dilemma..else speak to him...he may not like it thought but thats the best way to it
2006-11-08 19:18:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋