Any suggestions on how to deal with stress?

Question

I am very stressed! I have a stressful job, 2 small kids and the usual life stuff to deal with - don't we all....

How do people deal with stress when it builds up and you feel like you are going to explode - either into rage, myself into tears, etc.

I tried exercising but did not like it! Made me more tired and did not look forward to it.

Any suggestions/advice would be very welcome.

Answer 1

I havent read through all answers so my ideas may have been suggested before.

I think stress often boils down to the fact that you are doing nothing for YOU or nothing you like.

Can you look at your life and see how you can cut down on your responsibilities and get some 'me' time.

If, for example, you knew that on Mondays evenings for two hours someone was always going to have the kids, then it would be something to look forward to. I know these things are hard to arrange, and no good if you have to run round like a maniac getting food prepared etc just so you can have 2 hours off.

Can you swap kids with another mother? Could your partner do more? Could you cut down on your working hours, or change jobs?

With a job and two small kids, dont try and take anything more on. Good enough will do. you dont need to be perfect.

I hate exercising too - but recently i have got into have a half hour power walk a day and it does help. I know with kids its hard to get out - all those coats, and gloves, and little boots, but it does help getting out into the open air.

I do hope you are able to see where you could maybe cut down. Remember your kids need a mother who takes care of herself.

Best wishes,

Faith.

Answer 2

Hi,

I also work in a high stress job and with a family who gets into depression, etc. All the usual stuff. Some of the things that I do so that stress does not get to me is

(a) When there is a lot of babble from your partner. Close your ears. Let them talk. They will get off their steam without passing it on to you.

(b) Flirt a bit in office. It is good for your system. It also is a great stress buster. Mild flirting is great. (I know this is not the conventional but believe me this helps a lot.

(c) Use a stress buster ball or a lump of clay and leave it on your desk or in the kitchen and play with it to remove all the stress.

(d) Do go out on a holiday (just a weekend break) some times. It also is great for bonding.

(e) Send off your kids to stay overnight at friends and family and give yourself time to paper your body.

(f) Have you tried getting a massage. A good body massage does a lot of good. I did learn and do give massage to friends sometime and know that if done right, it is great but done incorrectly, it will create more trouble. So get the right person to give you a massage

Well try a few of these and you will feel better. Stress is more in the mind than any where else so clean your mind

Added:-

And yes as some people have suggested raw passionate sex is also a great stress buster (but with the right partner)

Answer 3

Stressful job and family life
I guess you want work-family balance
OK put a list of important things you want to do both at work and at home.
Prioritise the list
Things that need to be done now
Things that need to be done soon
Things that need to be done at some stage (shelf those for now)
Work list one as soon as possible
the second list you should priorities those as well and work through them on your pace
When you are dealing with a stressful situation stand back take a deep breath and see what is the cause of this situation and address the cause not only the situation.
Enjoy your self and take every opportunity to take pleasure in the small things in life. Sleep well, eat well and exercise
Good luck

Answer 4

Meditation is great for stress, best time to do it is when the kiddies are in bed or in your lunch hour at work, its easy to do and costs nothing, just put a nice chilled out CD on, personal cd player and headphones at work, make yourself comfortable, close your eyes, let your body relax from the roots of your hair to the tips of your toes, think of a place that is special to you or imagine your sat on a nice river bank on a warm sunny day, your toes are dipped in the water, there isn't a sound at all, now stay there for at least 10 minuets and chill, open your eyes very slowly and there you are, a bit better, I know you have kiddies but do it as often as you can as it really does help, good luck and hope your chilled out soon.

Answer 5

People can work - for a while - under pressure but not under stress - so:

1. see your GP now and ask him to refer you to a self help group in your area

2. Analyse with a loved one what the pressures are and address them

3. Avoid or reduce alcohol and cigarettes if you smoke

4. Gentle exercise - a walk in a park taking in the sights and smells of nature will help you to unwind

5. write down what bothers you and what triggers the anger. The stages are usually in an escalating order of - frustration, anger, aggression, violence - so work on the frustration and the other 3 will go away - good luck

Answer 6

Techniques of stress management include
self-understanding (e.g. self-identification as a Type A or as a Type B personality)
Cognitive therapy
self-management (e.g. becoming better-organized)
conflict resolution
positive attitude
self-talk
Autogenic training
breathing
Progressive relaxation
meditation
exercise
diet
rest
Stress balls
therapeutic massage
Nervous laughter
Some techniques of time management may help a person to control stress. For example:

becoming more organized and reducing the generation of clutter
setting priorities can help reduce anxiety
using a "to do" list of tasks that a person needs to complete can give a person a sense of control and accomplishment
Effective stress management involves learning to set limits and to say "No" to some demands that others make.

Good luck

Answer 7

I don't suggest chain smokin. smokin itself is a stressor to your body. at an early stage it's a help but when you get addicted, you'd be sorry you started smokin. stress is our body's reaction to stressors like your kids, work. One way to perk up again is to relax a bit. I guess you have a day off. spend it with yourself. if your kids are not bothersome, tag them along with you to the park or leave them at your parents' house for you to relax. pamper yourself during day offs. it pays.
another is your point of view to things you face with everyday. optimism could be a key t lighten the stress. love your household chores, love your work at the office. loving these stuff is a sure stress tab. = ) and another, teach your kids with love to do some household chores,--if they are big enough i believe you can ask favor with a 5 year old kid--that by the time you get home...you wouldn't worry too much. that's why it's called a family because you help each other up. = )

optimism+good diet+20 minute exercise 3-4x a week+relaxation time at weekends. i know it sounds a little complicated but once this gets to you system it becomes easy.
before facing your work try to stop, close your eyes, free yourself from any thoughts for a few seconds and take a three slow deep breaths. = ) and smile and say to your self...have a nice day!!!
and another...the most important...ask from God the help you need. The Lord said, ask and it shall be given...havefaith in god for he is a sure shelter. = )

Answer 8

Please don't use alcohol as it is a stimulant. Well I have been going to a hynotherapist and it has been great. My anxiety stopped almost immediately. However, hynotherapy is expensive so here are some things I learned in the process:

Learn to breathe - take deep breaths in and let them out really slowly. Fill your lungs!
When you start to feel nervous or stressed, refocus on something else, including the breathing. As soon as you feel the adrenalin kicking in, start the breathing exercise. Imagine the thing that is stressing you out to be a mountain and tell yourself that you don't need to climb that mountain, you can go around it or turn back.

Answer 9

It doesn't go away, but find a method of release, I can block it from my brain for the best part of the time, when it gets to be too much I go to bed early and sleep by any method I can find usually booze and wake up in the morning with the same problem but I have switched off for 8 hours and a new day is a good day.

Answer 10

I think that you need an escape. How about some relaxing music. There are some good meditation CD's, or maybe some nice classical music (Smooth Classics for Rough Days, maybe)?

Find some personal space, and listen to such music on an MP3 player. Perhaps treat yourself to some chocolates.

I would recommend the above for mild stress. If it's more serious, you should maybe see your GP.