How much time do you actually spend playing with your kids?

Question

I am a busy stay at home mom of 2 preschoolers. Sometimes I feel horrible because I don't spend hours a day playing with my children. Is this normal? I mean it's not to say that I don't interact with my children. I bring them along on errands, and I am physically around them all day. They are very independent, so a lot of times they are happily playing by themselves while I clean, do the bills, make dinner, or do whatever else that has to be done around the house. I am even "homeschooling" my 4 year old because he is too young for kindergarten, but I feel like he is ready for some academic stimulation (I'm a former school teacher).

The thing is that some days I feel like the day has gone by so fast, and then the kids are asleep and I go in to kiss them at night and I feel like I miss them--like I didn't spend enough time with them that day. Does anyone else feel like this? How much time would you say that you actually spend playing with your kids?

Answer 1

I think all moms feel this way. I spend sooo much time with my kids. I homeschool as well. I'm also a former teacher. I interact with my kids all day. We do school work. They help me around the house. They're with me when I run errands. We play board games just about once a day. I watch their favorite cartoons with them. We have a family movie night once a week. I play video games with my oldest. They help me in the kitchen during the day and they each have a night they prepare dinner. They have my attention ALL THE TIME. And yet there will be nights when I miss them and wonder if I did enough. My husband has to remind me that when we were growing up our parents never spent time with us the way we do with our kids. He is right. My mom was at home but me and my brother were sent outside to play in the neighborhood while she cleaned, watched soaps and read romance novels. I just remind myself of that and I know I'm doing a lot for my kids. I'm at home and here whenever they need me. That is more than many kids can say.

Answer 2

I don't think any parent feels like they spend enough time with their kids. You just have so much love for them. I work full time, as soon as I get home I play with my son for about 1/2 an hour then I cook dinner, eat, and clean house. We play again for about an hour then it is bath time and bed time. So really only 1 1/2 hours. There is 24 hours in a day so not nearly enough time. On the week ends I try to make it up to him.

Answer 3

I play with my son all day in between cleaning and household chores. Sometimes, it is okay if you don't get everything done, If the house isn't spotless, If you order takeout. I make time every day for him whether I have extra time or not. He only gets one childhood and I wouldn't miss it for anything. Not the dishes, the errands, not even the bills. I do it when he is asleep. Being physically around them isn't quality time at least not in my opinion. I work outside the home part time so I can stay at home with him (he has special needs so daycare isn't an option) while my husband works and he stays with him while I work. He always has one of us around. I do realize how lucky we are to be able to this for him, But it comes with a lot of sacrifice too.

Answer 4

Yes. I know exaclty how you feel. It is guilt. There are days that go by when my 4 year old girl asks me five or six times to spend time with her and I keep telling her....as soon as I'm done with this, honey. Then bedtime comes and I realize I never did read her that book, I never did go in her room and see how she had her toys set up, and I never took her to the park like I promised. When I look back, I realize guilt is for a reason, and we wouldn't feel this way if we were doing things right. We should both make a change and play with our kids....it might actually be fun!

Answer 5

I feel the exact same way, and I asked a question similar to this one a couple of days ago!

I guess it's totally normal to feel this way. I do feel guilty, though. I just wish I had more time/energy to play with my 3-year old. I do try to take her to the park if it's not too cold out, and read books to her. I guess that counts.

Even though I'm with her all day (and we interact-- she likes to help with "cooking", and doing chores), I guess that I can honestly say that I spend about half an hour to 1 hr of "quality time" with her per day.

Answer 6

I'm yet another mother who works external the house. If I did not my youngsters might no longer have meals to devour or a position to reside. I paintings nine-five and now we have matters to do during the week. Mondays now we have cheer (five y/o), Tuesdays counseling (five y/o, feasible PTSD), Wednesdays basketball (10 y/o), Thursdays ladies scouts, Fridays are household night time and utterly chaotic, Saturdays are their video games, Sundays now we have have church. In a nutshell...we get house in time to devour, do homework, and get competent for mattress. We reside in Ohio so for part the 12 months we are not able to do too many out of doors hobbies. Ice skating might be pleasant however we are living within the core of nowhere. Sledding? No, it is beautiful flat in which we are living too. During the summer time, or each time it is above fifty five or 60, we're regularly external within the evenings. If we do not cross to a playground or park we're mountain climbing. Neither of my youngsters look traumatized considering I do not play with them day-to-day.

Answer 7

I have a Great website for you. They have print outs and it grows up with them it goes up until they are 7 years old my 4 year old loves it and when i want to i can do it with him too. Yeah i am in the same boat you are in. I go to collegel and i am married and take care of my kids i am homeschooling my 4yr old too bc he tested out of the 4 year old program. But the website is clever island.com it updates itself and your child can go anywhere and get on it. I just make up things i do like 5 minutes with him sometimes while the laundry is on then i go do that things I do not spend a whole lot not hours and hours but i try to spend some time with him. I have a 1 year old too so sometimes he has to have more of my time then my 4 year old. My 1 year old and my 4 year old are independent. You are doing the schooling thing im sure he/she enjoyes that very much that is spending time with them i do that too and my four year old loves it too. I do quick crafts with him One time i went in the back yard got dirt and colored the dirt with different food colorings it too like not even 5 minutes to do that then we put it in a cup and he made sand art out of it. i print him out some thins to do off the net. I can not spend whole lot of time even though i would like too but i just set a time out for him and me to do things like do little crafts and drawings just easy stuff that does not cost money and i do that maybe couple days out of the week while the little one sleeps. I feel the same way i wish i could spend more time with them.
Youre not alone on this one. Maybe you can do what i do too i do let my 4 year old help cook dinner set the table and little things like that. He loves that too. You are doing your best and you are a good mother.
www.cleverisland.com is a very good website and very safe.

Answer 8

i have two preschoolers aswell....my son is 3.5 and my daughter is 22months......
there are always days where you dont think you have spent enough time with them...but you know what...ive come to the conclusion that there is only so many hours in a day...and so much to do in that day...
i try to do all my fun activities with the kids in the morning i find that works best we are all fresh and enjoy that time....leaving my chores and preperation of dinner for the afternoon.
its a balance and it doesnt always go to plan but hey....your one person...working 24/7 and have 6 jobs....the mother, the wife, the laundry maid, the cleaner, the cook, the nurse.....the list goes on.....

Answer 9

welcome to the real world, you do well too give the attention they get a lot of older parents feel the same but alot of the younger generation are the opposite and blame the kids for stopping the parents from doing what young people do, but the kids never asked to come into this world . In other words kids come first everything else follows

Answer 10

never nearly enough, mom of 3 full time 2nd shift job.