By the way, my bf is very wishy-washy, afraid of confrontation. He wouldn't even call me to break up with me(we are long-distance). He just stopped calling and let myself figure it out. He broke up with me before. But as long as i show up in front of him, we went back together. It seems to me that his decisions can be changed by me if i keep showing up in front of him b/c he is indecisive in nature. He openly admits he's upset about us, he doesn't really know what to do, one way or the other. So i'm thinking whether i should do what i did before, fly up there and change his mind or not contact him for a month or so maybe he'll change his mind himself since he'll feel like i'm not chasing him any more, which made me attractive again? But i'm worried what if after a month he still doesn't want me back? then i should've done the "changing his mind by flying up thing". Please tell me a bit about guys' psychology. What to do to make a guy want you back again?
Thanks a lot!
2006-11-08 13:22:43 · 14 answers · asked by little asian gal in cresent city 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You cannot drag someone kicking and screaming into loving you or wanting you. Do you really want a man you have to intimidate back into the relationship.
Let him move on and you do so to. Find someone local that can treat you well and you can enjoy on a daily basis.
Seriously, if you manipulate the guy into staying with you and he really doesn't want to - he will end up cheating because you won't let him go.....move on sis, you'll be happy again...it just takes time.
2006-11-08 13:26:56 · answer #1 · answered by chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you sound like a very sweet and PROACTIVE girl. I really don't think you should have to do that much work for this guy. He should want you on his own. If he doesn't and you are willing to go that far for someone, I'm sure another guy would love and appreciate you for it. Honestly, he doesn't sound like he's really worth you right now, so I'd just let him be for a month or something. He'll come back, and if he doesn't then he lost a great thing.
2006-11-08 21:28:07 · answer #2 · answered by Tgrman80 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he is you bf tells me that you are considering him for marriage. From what you described,he doesn't sound like a very good catch. Good lord,you almost described me. Anyway,I had a girlfriend who I was thinking of breaking up with. But she broke up with me first. All of a sudden my thoughts of breaking up with her went out the window. She gave me a major attitude adjustment.
And you sound rather strong willed,where he is not. And what do they say ? Opposites attract? While my first thoughts were that of him being a bad catch, he sounds like he could really benefit from a strong er willed person helping him get along in life. He's got to have some good points about him or you wouldn't love him,right?
2006-11-08 22:05:09 · answer #3 · answered by doggybag300 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know its hard when u want a guy back but u dont want him to think that u need him if he wants u or even cares 4 u he will be back just let him go if its ment things will happen the way u want them to dont push things that is a big turn off thats the last thing u what things will get better if u let them by showing up at his door he will think that u r needie
2006-11-08 21:48:55 · answer #4 · answered by baby_lovenm69 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems desparate act, and somewhat stalker-ish. If I were in his shoes, I would bolt. He needs his space. Think about it, there's obviously a real reason why you broke up in the first place. I would not fly to where he is to change his mind. He's got to make that change on his own. I think the best thing for you to do is to move on.
2006-11-08 21:30:20 · answer #5 · answered by Steph L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have to show up in front of him just to remind him that he still wants you....girl, shouldn't want to make him want you again. When both people in a relationship do not make a FULLTIME effort to save or rebuild a relationship....you end up with a one sided house. If he truly cared about you, he'd adore you whether you were 3 ft. away or 3000 miles away.
2006-11-08 21:27:06 · answer #6 · answered by shibabigirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, why do you still want to be with him? clearly he has lost interest in you. and he is not man enough to tell you. i think showing up in front of him everytime he wants to break up with you is the solution to your problems. clearly he has some issues about your relationships. probably it is about your being in a long distance relationship. talk to him about it, find a real solution, and work things out. don't rely on just showing up in front of him and waiting for everythoing to be ok again. if you want your relationship to really last, find the right solution.
2006-11-08 21:49:29 · answer #7 · answered by Coolitz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really want your life to keep going on like a roller coaster, fly up there. If you'd like to finally have a stable, non long distant, MAN in your life, then I suggest you move on! Your choice. Do you want to waste time on him again, or try someone else out?
2006-11-08 21:28:02 · answer #8 · answered by yokrem 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not find someone who really wants you instead of someone who makes you do all the work?
2006-11-08 21:25:30 · answer #9 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep telling him that other guys are hitting on you.
2006-11-08 21:25:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋