I am an older woman who has been in a relationship with a younger man(11yrs younger) for the last 7yrs we have two children together and he has recently told me he has no plans on ever getting married. i on the other hand have always been a family oriented person and want to get married one day. the question i am asking is do i go my own way and let him grow-up or do i pretend to be happy and cheat until the children are of age and what if i meet the man of my dreams on the way how do i leave without to much heart ache for all of us?
2006-11-08 12:05:54 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i think u r wrong for making him have sex with u without marriage because i am sure he wont marry u
he is looking for someone else
its ur fault
now think of making him marry u because u have kids from him
2006-11-08 12:10:29 · answer #1 · answered by micho 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There is absolutely nothing wrong with age gaps in relationships. Relationships where one party wants marriage and the other doesn't work out very rarely. It has absolutely nothing to do with "growing up." Just because you want marriage doesn't mean that everyone who doesn't is immature. If you want something out of the relationship that he has no interest in, I would say there's no point in continuing.
Also, "pretending to be happy" for the children never works. You get stressed and I guarantee that your kids will pick up on that. My parents pulled that trick and it gave me all sorts of issues.
2006-11-08 20:10:32 · answer #2 · answered by evil little girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Neither. That you are not married by law does not free you of the commitment you both made by having children together. Make it work. This is not a matter of age. Are you sure you are the older of the two?
2006-11-08 20:13:10 · answer #3 · answered by David 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have tackled the marriage issue before bringing two children into this world. If he told you he has no plans to marry you , believe him. He probably just doesn't want to marry YOU.
And why cheat, if you are not happy with him, leave him.
2006-11-08 20:09:30 · answer #4 · answered by Marti M 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
personally i don't see the need for marriage but it sounds important to you and he should respect that. its not a question of age its more a question of where you both see yourselves heading. i think you should question why marriage is so important to you. there is no such thing as a man of your dreams i mean, they all have faults. and if you feel like cheating then maybe you should just leave.
be a strong independent woman, for your sake and your children's you don't need a man or to cheat as an excuse for leaving.
2006-11-08 20:12:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do you want to get married??
you are living togther as a married couple --- its committed with children
if you dont want to be with him then marriage will not change how you feel
i think he is the more mature one based on your words -- he is not cheating he is honest and he is staying
you both need to talk and find out what is really happening
2006-11-08 20:11:05 · answer #6 · answered by trader1867 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should have found out how he feels about marriage before you had kids. Now even if you left him you still will have ties to him because of the kids and that could effect on your next relationship.
2006-11-08 20:12:01 · answer #7 · answered by Johnny Transplant 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After seven years I think this is kind of a joke question. Ask the kids what THEY think.
2006-11-08 20:07:58 · answer #8 · answered by Scarlett_156 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YES MY WIFE IS 9 YEARS OLDER THAN I WE HAVE NOW BEEN MARRIED 25 YEARS
2006-11-08 20:08:58 · answer #9 · answered by rainsong41 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋