Myself and my hubby have the first 2 grandchild on his side of tha family but his father's site ONLY talks about the other children. Should be be angry hurt and upset? Not to meantion there is a poem there for the youngest baby!!!
2006-11-08 11:30:24 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I can understand your feelings. My in-laws definitely favor their other grandchildren. They don't even remember what size clothes to buy my oldest daughter. They send gifts that their other grandchildren like and just figure my daughters like the same things.
They never come to our house for Christmas and when we go out to see them, they will not celebrate the holidays unless my husbands sister and her kids are present. They don't make my children feel special...ever.
So I have finally decided that I can't take anymore. I don't send pictures to them anymore, I don't call them with updates of the kids anymore and I have decided that we are not going there this year for Christmas. I'm tired of being treated as second class family members. Besides that, there isn't much I can do since its my husbands family and he's too indifferent to get upset by it.
2006-11-08 11:38:32 · answer #1 · answered by tmreiber 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you should feel angry, who wouldn't? But having a go at him wouldn't solve anything. Next time you are with him, casually mention that you were reading his website and thought the poem for the baby was very heartfelt. Maybe say you showed it to your children and they commented that they can't wait to see what grandad will say about them on his site. Another approach is to mention it casually to your mother-in-law? Maybe she would talk to him. I know grandparents tend to have favourites, but it is very wrong to completely exclude the other grandchildren. Maybe your hubby could take a more direct approach and tell his dad that you feel hurt and ask for an explanation to his thoughtless behaviour. Whatever you do, all the best!!
2006-11-08 13:43:56 · answer #2 · answered by salstick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm it sounds like my grandparents on both sides. Try to plan group activities when you go there and the kids are older that they all get to participate in so it isn't as obvious to the kids most of the time, like baking cookies, where all kids get to mix and pour stuff in. Make rules that they can't obviously spend a lot of money on one kid and not the other. My mom and her husband were like that with their grand kids, and it took me to step up and give them a few ground rules so the kids don't know about favoritism. I knew who their favorites were and it was obvious to the adults but at least the kids didn't know, also we had them spend the night separately and in pairs so it helped out a lot. But the biggest issue we had was my step dad would want to spend 150 dollars on his daughter's son and wouldn't want to spend any money at all for my mom's direct grandchildren. So I made a rule about Christmas gifts. And if he is gonna buy extra still it needs to go to their home and be labeled from Santa so when they all come over to open gifts one child doesn't have more than the others. And the other kids don't know that pawpaw bought the other kid five gifts while they got one. Favoritism is horrible and childish, you gotta make some rules that fit your situation, so you need to get your sister your parents and your husband all make some coffee or tea and talk it over and work out how the favoritism goes. They can't continue being blunt about it, it is not right to the other children, they don't understand why Richard and Kayleigh. and fyi to your MIL twins and other multiples tend to be more mild tempered and they comfort each other so yes they usually cry a lot less than singleton babies. (not always, but it usually works out like that)
2016-05-21 23:01:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-04-27 14:38:36 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should tell him how you feel then get over that maybe your child/children or not the fav. no its not right but every grandparent does it
2006-11-08 12:57:51 · answer #5 · answered by allison b 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't worry about it. you might be reading too much into it. if you are not and he is being spitful that is not your problem, it's his. you can't do anything about it so there is no point getting angry.
2006-11-08 11:34:24 · answer #6 · answered by onlylove41 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not that you shouldnt be upset, but if this bothers you why do you go to his web site? stop going to it, its that simple.
2006-11-08 13:39:09 · answer #7 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't look for reasons to be hurt. it's his site, and he writes what moves him.
2006-11-08 11:33:29 · answer #8 · answered by no_wait_hes_spartacus 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋