My boyfriend and I have know eachother scince we were born. Over the past 2 years our families have become closer and about 9 months ago we started going out, but the rule is no mushy stuff as in, no presents other than Christmas and Birthdays, harldy any phyical contact, ect... We come to the point where were uncomfterable hugging(which we haven't) due to our parents freaking out. Not to mention we have no alone time, we haven't even been on a date yet, the only time we see eachother is when our families get together. I wish I could say we see eachother at school but were both homeschooled. I understand our parents concern, were young (we both recently turned 15) but it dosen't even feel like were in a relationship and we've been going out for almost a year. My question is do you think our parents have gone a little overborde? Or am I going to have to give this even more time? Sereious replies please.
2006-11-08 11:15:20 · 14 answers · asked by JaneElaine 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Communicate the details you just expressed here to your parents and ask for their input. If you have feelings for one another then you should communicate that to them as well. Your parents will probably respect your honesty. Reassure them of any insecurities they might have.
2006-11-08 11:20:26 · answer #1 · answered by David W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well regardless to what we think.. as long as you parents aren't forcing you to stay in the house and they are still being reasonable and not harming you then you probably have to act acordingly until you move out. Maybe you can talk to them in an adult fashion.. if that doen't work, maybe you can bring in a family councilor.. (maybe from doctor/church/relative/neighbour) and somehow use them to help your parents see your point of view. Try telling your parents that you are afraid their strict rules might cause a rift in your family relationship... that you understand they are looking out for your best interest, and that they have raised you well and can trust in the choices you make.
If this doesn't work.. I suggest when you are 18 move out. Don't go now.. that will only set up problems for you in a new city. When you are a little older (18) you will have the tools to be on your own.
Are you wanting to be with your boyfriend because you know it is something you aren't allowed to do?
If you were allowed to see your boyfriend and be close and mushy with him would you stay in your current situation, they way things are at home?
Or is this a motivator for wanting to change your life.. realising that you want to live differently than the strict life your parents lead?
2006-11-08 19:24:41 · answer #2 · answered by Trudy Bell 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Both sets of parents are being too controlling. I'm guess they even check your email or buddy list to monitor whether or not you talk to him. If you have time to be on Yahoo questions, you could arrange to email your boyfriend outside the watchful eye of your parents.
If not, you should sit your parents down and tell them that a lack of a healthy social life could negatively affect your emotional development. You could negotiate going on a date with him if you both agree to tell your parents not to overstep the boundaries they set for your.
If they won't even allow that, then ask for a chaperoned date at the movies. And if that doesn't work, then your parents are overdoing it.
2006-11-08 19:20:24 · answer #3 · answered by Mangalita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents are the ones going over board. Do not feel like you are being crazy or ridiculous! You should be allowed to see you boyfriend! i started dating my boyfriend when i was barely 14 and we have been dating a really long time now, but back then we saw each other every other day or at least twice a week... You need to talk to your parents and tell them how you are feeling because it is ridiculous that you feel uncomfortable hugging your boyfriend
2006-11-08 19:20:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your parents are just trying to protect you. Maybe you could talk to them about asking your friend along on a family outing. That way you could see each other more often. What about going for a walk, while the families are visiting? Can you talk to each other on the phone? As frustrating as it can be, it's actually good to take things slowly. Good luck!
2006-11-08 19:28:50 · answer #5 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, i'm in the same position your in. My parents also freak out when my boyfriend and I want to be alone.
Maybe you should wait until you both get a car, then you could see each other more offen! I think your parents need to chill a little, if they trust you, then they have nothing to be worried.
2006-11-08 19:21:38 · answer #6 · answered by Kai-Kai 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You shud confront ur parents(in a nice, sweet way) and say, I kno you don't want me and ( so and so) to b too close but it makes me feel akward since he is my boyfriend and we can't show it". Then u cud say something like, " I'm not saying that I want to hav my way,all I'm asking is for u to trust me enuf to give me sum space". Try to sound as sweet as possible so u don't upset ur parents. Good luck
2006-11-08 19:30:33 · answer #7 · answered by diamond 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you discussed this with your parents,and ask them if you two could go to the movies or something. It is that time for you to earn trust among them so ask them to allow you to do that.
2006-11-08 19:19:10 · answer #8 · answered by Let's keep it real. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes...ur parents need 2 give u space...like go out 2 eat or sumthin...ive personally never been on a date...but still...dont give in til u really need 2...good luck girly
2006-11-08 19:17:59 · answer #9 · answered by cool chic 2no 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think your parents have gone a little overboard but their your parents and their always gonna worry about you but i think you two should be able to do whatever you want and you should tell your parents how you feel and they might listen
2006-11-08 19:20:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋