I've been trying so hard to get guys to notice me. But every time I try to do that I start to feel that I'm to ugly for them or that I'm not good enough why is this?
2006-11-08 06:49:13 · 18 answers · asked by megan s 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it's not that i dress down or any thing i dress nice and i do have guys that are my friends but i just want ot knoow why girls do this because i do want this kid and he says he is my friend but he acks weird arond me and no one else. I feel that maybe he told my friend that he only liked me as a friend. that makes me think I am to ugly for him.
2006-11-08 07:09:39 · update #1
Honey, there is many guys for every girl. If you don't worry about it chances are they will come to you in no time. Plus, do no guys like you, or do no guys you like like you?
2006-11-08 06:52:21 · answer #1 · answered by zippo_lyp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You, like many women, are suffering from low self-esteem or anxiety. There also is a possibility that you may have a fear of actually receiving genuine attention from a man and therefore reject the possibility by thinking that you're completely undesirable. Many of us like the idea of love and romance in the abstract yet are terrified when the possibility that someone real may be attracted to us.
Personally, I'd recommend that you not be so desperate for romance and stop focusing so much on guys as love objects and more as people -- friendship. This is probably discouraging to you, but people are often more interesting and fun to be around when you're not trying to make them fall in love with you. Be assured that you're your own worst critic and that 99% of the things that you hate about yourself, other people won't even notice because they're too busy thinking about what other people think of them.
This is very difficult to overcome, but I've found that doing things to make you feel better about your looks can be helpful like doing your hair nicely, or wearing a new necklace, or a new shade of lipstick. Make an effort to look nice everyday because wearing baggy track pants all the time with only make you feel dumpy and unattractive. Wear attractive clothes, take care of yourself (working out can do wonders for your mood), and walk as if you own the world and as if people should admire you.
2006-11-08 15:03:37 · answer #2 · answered by Cybele 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I feel the same way sometimes! Don't worry though, I'm sure that there are guys that like you, they are just too shy or afraid of rejection. I always thought that too, but some of my guy friends said they get tired of being rejected, so a lot of times, guys won't even bother to ask the girl out. Also, you may be so pretty and nice that they think you are out of their league, and that they would never have a chance with you. In other words, they coudl be intimidated by you! Just stay strong and be patient! And no you are not "too ugly or not good enough" for them, God made you and you are special and beautiful in your own way, as everyone is. You need to have self-confidence and love yourself!! God has the right guy in mind for you, I promise! :) And if there is a certain guy you like, maybe let him know directly (tell him) or indirectly (flirting, smiling, eye-contact, etc.) He may just like you back!! :) Good luck and God bless!!
<3
2006-11-08 14:55:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You don't have high self esteem. In order to get that you have to believe that you're important and you have to have self love. That means you have to know that you matter and are valuable. Start by making a list of things you like about yourself and from there try to think of some of your talents and the things that make you happy. Then, delve into those things and try to believe that you are important and valuable. The superficial things won't matter to the man who loves you. From there take things one day at a time and slowly you'll have built your confidence. Then everything else will follow and if you don't find someone don't worry because it'll happen when it's supposed to and you'll be fine regardless.
2006-11-08 14:56:32 · answer #4 · answered by Mille_D-Gurl08 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This happens because people rely on others to validate their self-worth. If you feel you are 'good enough' only when a guy likes you, you are giving someone else the power to affect your view of yourself. Do things that will help you feel good about yourself (for example, go to the gym, read a great book, take an art class and learn to draw). You will feel great without depending on others to make you feel good about yourself. As an added bonus, people will be attracted to your positivity. Good luck!
2006-11-08 14:56:01 · answer #5 · answered by Noelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because the old (but wrong) conditioning is still out there that says a woman is supposed to be with a man...and that some how our lives cannot be full and happy if we are not in a relationship...some women base their entire self worth and happiness, on whether or not they have a partner...
It's sad...we don't "need" guys...we often want to be with them and that's a much preferable situation...I'd WAY rather someone be with me out of desire to be with ME, rather than because they just thought they needed to be with a chick to make their life whole...that's not flattering at all...
2006-11-08 14:53:19 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because girls have self esteem issues. They feel that they have to be perfect, when there is no such thing as perfection. I bet you are in highschool, where boys are shallow. Don't become a sl*t to get boys to notice you. Just be yourself, and the right guy will come along.
2006-11-08 14:53:13 · answer #7 · answered by johnsonjrod 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny you say that, cuz I feel the same way towards most women. Its harder for a guy to find a girl. Most good girls don't have to look, a guy will just come up to them. But hey, I'm always here
2006-11-08 14:51:51 · answer #8 · answered by Timmy Mic 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like you don't believe enought in yourself. Your looking too much for others to give you a "grade". Stop wasting your time looking for others and start believing on what you are really worth. And don't worry they guys will start comming quick enougth when they understand that theres a real "jet" around.
2006-11-08 14:54:48 · answer #9 · answered by Avi W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone wants to be wanted,you may be that girl that because you are pretty they are shy to talk to you.I bet that you are a very sweet girl and a bit shy.That`s good ,when the time comes you`ll get to much attention and then you won`t know what to do.
2006-11-08 14:56:27 · answer #10 · answered by Step 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try a new approach don't let the guy know u like him play hard to get it turns boys on ten times more. I have no idea why.
2006-11-08 14:51:05 · answer #11 · answered by MELISSA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋