Tantrums at 14 months?

Question

I have been taking my 14 month old daughter to toddlers every week, however if she does not get her own way she screams (really loud) at the other kids. Also if I take her away from something as we have to go or whatever she kicks and trys to hit her head backwards. Am I the only one who is going through this?

Answer 1

Nope, welcome to the "terrible two's". But don't dispair because this is one of the most valuable learning times in your young daughter's life! At this age, your daughter is beginning to realize that she is a separate entity from you and she wants to explore that freedom -- this is a good thing. However, in her little burst of independence, she needs to learn limits and self-control. That's where you come in, you are going to be her first and greatest teacher! When she is doing these sorts of behaviors, start with a simple "No!" as a reminder. If she continues the behavior, you need to calmly remove her from the situation. When she has settled down and is ready to re-enter the game or playgroup or situation, you need to tell her something like: "Sweetie, I know you want to play the game but the other kids don't like it when you scream like that (or hit, or bite, or whatever the bad behavior was). You need to play nice." You can use your own words, but you need to use them. She won't understand everything you are trying to convey because of her age, but she will understand that you were disappointed and she will try to do better to make you happy again. This works for everything from touching the TV control buttons to temper fits in public. Be calm, and be assertive -- but don't be abusive. You are the parent, you are in charge -- help her remember that and she'll get past this stage. Good luck!

Answer 2

No, you are not the only one who has been trough this sort of behavior but you need to get her straightened out before she becomes too set in her ways. Stay calm: Do not yell at her or strike her or threaten her.

Does she see yelling and screaming at home? If she does then you need to stop that sort of action in up the household.

I did not have this problem with my son but my friend had the problem with her son and she was a nervous person who was always pushing her son to do things too advanced for his age

Time out is the best. Talk to the people at the toddlers week and see if they can offer suggestions. Together you should decide an effective way to react to her tantrums and how to remedy her problem. If she did that to me I would take her into her room and put her in her crib and let her get over her anger. If you approach her and she starts this sort of behavior again then leave her alone. Let her know you do not want to be around her and ignore her tantrums when she is acting in this manner.

http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/tantrums.html

http://www.comeunity.com/parenting/extinction.html

Answer 3

Not at all, my eldest daughter had terrible tantrums from 14 months. She would headbutt everything, I had to have a fringe cut into her hair to hide the horrible bruises on her forehead. She would headbutt corners of tables, skirting boards, doors walls. I dealt with it by just ignoring her telling that it was silly and mummy was not paying any attention to her. If she carried on, I would put her in the spare bedroom with a stairgate in the door so she couldn't get out until she had calmed down. You have to be firm and stay calm. She's still young to understand that she will be back to continue her play when you have gone where you need to go. It's just mixed up emotions and not being able to express herself in any other way than screaming and hurting herself to get attention. Don't give her that attention and she will learn that this is not the way to get it!!

Answer 4

My son is 3 years old and he is doing the exact same thing I give him time out ignore him but he hits and gets even agrier you are not alone my son just started these big tantrums about 6 months ago just be consistant with her when you discipline and go to their level when speaking with her calmly and make her look you in the eyes and explain how this is not acceptable behavior. Believe me it will get easier my son is the youngest of 4 boys and I made it through the other 3.

Answer 5

NOO!!! i read the title and i was like my daughter! no she gets cookies every once in a while when shes hit her head or been extreamly well behaved and if she wants another one and doesnt get it look out! its like mt. st helens all over again! i could be wrong but i think they are just trying to see what they can and cannot get away with. Also they are trying to learn and have fun and im not sure that they understand that things will still be there later or they can have more later. We hav a little couch for our daughter and when she throws a temper tantrum we just sit her on the couch and she seems to calm down and then when she stops crying she gets off the couch by her self... while you out i have no ideas!

Answer 6

We went through this with our daughter as well. At home we would just step over her and act like nothing was going on. This behavior stopped immediately. When she is in the presence of other children perhaps you should tell her in advance that if she acts improperly that she will not be allowed to do whatever she like to do. The key is to stick to what you say regardless of her antics. The more antics the more privledges she loses. Right up til she just has to go to bed. Hope this helps and remember just stick to what you say. It's tough but it's the only way.

Answer 7

No normal behaviour. She will come through it. Sometimes you just have to take her out of the situation which annoys her, hold her close and tell her she can't whatever. Its hard to expect her to rationalise. Stick with no if shes in the wrong! She'll grow up understanding there are boundary's in life. Sorry but a good strong willed child may do this for another of couple of years yet!
Each child has a unique personality and some are submissive and some strong willed but between 1-2 years children can be very self orientated.!!! Its very normal but very testing been there got the T shirt. You'll be fine!!!!!!!!!!! If she threatens to hurt herself strap her in her buggy. Good Luck.

Answer 8

No- shes just exercising her new found self. Not to worry its just one of many faces she,ll go through but what you need to do is make sure that this is not going to become a habit. Explain that shes not being nice and her behavior is bad but you love her abut because shes being nasty you have to give her 1 min of time out and sit here some where safe for 1 min. Lower your voice tone to let her know you mean business. It will not work the first or second time but after repeating this several times she will get the message. Good-luck.

Answer 9

Typical toddler tantrum. Normally they are something you should ignore but obviously if she's in a room full of other toddlers she's not going to be ignored when screaming. If she starts screaming when she's there, just pick her up and take her somewhere else. Explain to her that she's not going to play if she's going to scream and act up. Go back in (even if she's still screaming) and sit down with her on your lap. Don't let her get up and play again until she can calm down.

Answer 10

Stick to your guns. My girl is 12 months and is already starting to throw tantrums. Start giving her time outs, by having her sit in one place for 1 min. If she wants to hurt herself, let her. She's only doing it to get a reaction from you. Let her scream in her time out. Pick her up and put her back if she starts moving. When she's done, tell her what she did wrong, and ask for a hug and a kiss. I know she probably won't understand right away, but eventually, she will. Good luck!