A word of comfort for these females?

Question

I've been out with a couple of women now who's marriage had ended and they were very scared of being alone again and seemed to be anxious to tie the knot again. It's very creepy for a bloke to feel this on a first or second date.

Answer 1

I agree this sort of behaviour can be quite off - putting .
However there are males like that also - I have a 'mate ' like that.
just can't handle being on his own. when his first marriage ended he got involved with someone else within a few months - did end up marrying her & that has ended in a separation as well. within a month he was looking for someone else.
Also know another guy who did something similar ; was just out of a long marriage - but desperatley wanted to find someone ""special"" again immediately
these people tend to be very insecure in themselves & wonder why they tend to turn people off them.
I have been on my own for 5 years now ; am enjoyiong the company of various male friends, if 1 of these friednships develops further - that is fine ; if not fine also.
encourage these ladies to find new interests & to make new female friends as well as looking for male companionship.tell them to take the time to get to know themselves as they are now- as a person in their own right - NOT someones partner

GOOD ON YOU for being sensitive to this sort of dilemma

Answer 2

Yes there are some females like this - they seem tog o off a big tick box in their heads as to whether you'll get married or not - and they seem to want marriage or nothing at all. Very odd. You can either-

1.Learn how to use their insecurities to get your wicked way
or
2.Suggest that you'd prefer to be closer to being "friends" with them - take them on a few dates that aren't overly romantic, but fun - especially if you give them a chance to socialise with other people. They might have lost a lot of self esteem in the break up - you can help rebuild them by encouraging them to have more friends, then hopefully they'll be less clingy and less reliant on having a "bloke".

Answer 3

I'm divorced and I'm not scared of being alone at all. I raised my son and have had and still have a great job and career.
I won't ever get marreid again though. Surprisingly a lot of men don't want to hear that. BUT, doesn't mean I don't love men..DID take me awhile to trust them again...I did though in time...I think we mostly all do in time...but I like being alone and having my own space and independence...AND a boyfriend..who has his own place...lol.

I think men get a little gun-shy at tying the knot too after divorce...I don't think it's a woman thing - it's just human nature. Many after being married for some time will feel lonely soon after - some will find in time they actually like their own space (as I did) and some (most I think) do need to have someone to live WITH again. Everyone is different, but I think we are all gun-shy after divorce.

Answer 4

what type of woman would reveal that on a 1rst or 2nd date? Seriously are you sure you're not saying anything which brings the subject up, so they feel they have to let you know. By the way, i'm not having a pop at you. Good luck in meeting the right lady

Answer 5

They shouldn't feel anxious about tieing the knot again, theres no need to rush.
"Time is a healer" and eventually their hearts will heal.

Answer 6

I wouldn't know what to say to them. I'm divorced and have no plans on getting remarried ever! I think I would stay away from them. Desperation isn't very appealing!

Answer 7

I'd avoid them if you're not of the same mind. There's really nothing you can say.

Answer 8

difficult, they are not over the emotional things, it takes time

Answer 9

No rush

Answer 10

It must be.